Obaa Yaa
Unpleasant day in my life
Dear ObaaYaa,
We fell in love through strange circumstances and since then the expression of love between us in the first few years has been lovely and attractive to hundreds of our admirers.
The two of us came to the realisation that we were for each other and nothing could separate us.
Though we were mates in the university and completed the same year, she was employed three months before l secureda job and things were moving on well with us.
With time, l discovered to my surprise a change in her character, as conversation between us was not as fluid as it used to be. She retorted to my comments and complained about steps that l took.
I was utterly surprised with the change of events and, therefore, sensed that the future looked bleak for the two of us.
Despite these disturbing challenges, l was shocked to the marrow when one evening she sent me a message that she was no longer interested in the relationship and for that matter we should end it there.
After reading the message l called her to find out whether she was the one who sent the message and she confirmed to me that she did. Since she failed to provide an answer, l suggested that we meet and trash out whatever the problem was but she demanded that l should give her time to think about it.
I did all l could but she would not change her mind. This was indeed an unpleasant day in my life. Since that day, l went through sleepless nights, but it later occurred to me that life must go on despite the challenges.
Since then the idea of getting a partner in life has eluded me.
What shall l do?
Kojo, Tema
Dear Kojo,
I would like to encourage you to be courageous, maintain your youthful exuberance and be optimistic in life.
You are not the first person to experience a failed relationship, having enjoyed the promises and assurances which pointed to a lovely marriage life. Additionally, you will definitely not be the last person to fall into such trouble so do not lose hope.
Be reminded that marriage thrives when genuine love is in place and the two lovers are compatible. Otherwise, whatever you do will not be successful.
Be grateful to God that you have identified your differences early for which reason she requested that you should break up the relationship.
This is the time for you to pick up the pieces and position yourself for your life partner who will love and understand all that you do. Be consoled with the words in scripture which says that we should be thankful to God in all circumstances.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We bumped into each other on orientation day as freshers on campus. I liked his smile, his choice of words, and charisma. I didn’t hesitate at all when he asked for my contact. Who wouldn’t want to be friends with a guy like this, I said to myself.
We texted more often, had conversations on phone, and our friendship literally grew very strong. We attended lectures together, studied together, hanged out together; everyone thought we were lovers.
He did everything for me—surprise dates, thoughtful gifts, pays my academic fees, and gives me a listening ear everyone would wish for.
One evening at a friend’s birthday party, standing in the middle of the audience, he proposed and asked me to be his girlfriend. I declined his proposal; this was because I have no feelings for him, and I just want us to be friends.
He is a man with good morals, so gentle, God-fearing, ambitious, a man every lady would wish for, but my heart just wasn’t in it. I wondered if love was supposed to be this complicated: the more he did, the more I felt like a friend, not a lover. He still wants me, but I want us to be just friends. What should I do?
Naa Kwarley, Kaneshie.
Dear Naa Kwarley,
This is a tough situation, and you’re handling it with both kindness and firmness.
Since you’ve already told him you’re not interested in a romantic relationship, it’s crucial to be clear and direct while still being respectful. I’d advise you to reiterate your feelings to him, emphasising that you value him as a person and appreciate what he’s done, but you see him more as a close friend. Make it clear that you hope you can still maintain a strong friendship, but it can’t be anything more.
It’s essential to be prepared for him to need space or time to process, so be patient and understanding.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a regular reader of your highly esteemed paper and I would like to know whether some amount of money is paid to those who write short stories for publication on the children’s page of your Weekly Spectator.
I wrote a short story which was published last month, and my friends who saw it told me that a token will be paid to anyone whose story is published.
A.J., Kwabenya.
Dear A.J.,
We don’t pay for short stories published on our children’s page. That opportunity is to encourage school children to develop the habit of writing. We believe that by publishing their short stories, they’ll be encouraged to write more.
The paper is open to everyone who wants to share ideas or write about a concern.
