Obaa Yaa
Abortion made me lose interest in her
Dear ObaaYaa,
I find it interesting reading your column and wish to commend you for the able manner you have responded to letters sent to you.
I am deeply in love with a pretty lady and she also loves me just as l do. We are both happy together and wish to get married so that our happiness will continue. My friends are always happy when they see us together and support our decision to marry.
One interesting aspect of her life was that she was always around to lend her support in times of difficulties, a gesture l tried to reciprocate. Time without number, we did not hesitate to reaffirm our love for each other.
We were taken by surprise and embarrassed when she got pregnant. Though not ready for a child then l told her to take it easy and maintain the pregnancy as we quickly find an amicable solution to the problem.
l cited instances of ladies who had caused abortion and could not conceive when they needed to conceive. I explained to her that despite the initial mistake we made, she should maintain it and that l would not like to be associated with an abortion. Despite my explanation, she went ahead to abort the pregnancy.
Her behaviour has made me lose interest in her and l have planned not to marry her any longer.
Should l maintain my stand?
Kodzo, Accra.
Dear Kodzo,
The paper would like to thank you for reading this column to enrich your knowledge and also learn from it.
Reading this column constantly will provide you the opportunity to learn from the numerous problems that confront others and the solutions provided to guide you.
You have espoused the good qualities this lady possessed, and from your description she will be a good wife.
Why don’t you depend on the love you have for each other, forgive her for defying your orders and let bygones be bygones?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My marriage is falling apart because I spent more than an hour at the market, and I honestly do not know what to do anymore.
Anytime I visit the market, my husband gives me only one hour to return home regardless of wherever I have gotten to.
This has brought disagreement between my husband and I .What started as a disagreement between my husband and I has now become a family affair.
I never imagined that a simple trip to the market would lead to such a painful situation in my marriage.
He has told me to pack from our matrimonial home until further notice.
Baaba, Apam
Dear Baaba,
Do not allow family pressure to determine the future of your marriage.
Your husband’s family may genuinely want peace, but their desire to restore the marriage should not take priority over your emotional well-being.
Marriage reconciliation should not be about getting a woman back to her husband’s house at all costs.
You can respect your husband’s family without allowing them to dictate your decision.
On a more serious note, your husband should acknowledge the harm caused by his actions and apologise sincerely if he wrongfully sent you away. However, an apology alone is not enough to repair a marriage.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 27 years, living in a single room at Lapaz. I have stayed there for three years and I always pay my rent on time.
Last month, my landlord called me and said he had doubled the rent c from GH₵600 to GH₵1,200.
He says everything had increased so I must pay double or leave by the end of this month. I don’t have anywhere to go and I don’t have that amount. When I tried to beg him, he said if I don’t pay, he will lock my room.
Please advise me, what should I do? I am stressed.
Worried tenant.
Dear worried tenant,
I don’t know why your landlord is acting this way. He cannot just lock your room or eject you like that. In Ghana, the Rent Act mandates a landlord to give proper written notice and go through the Rent Control Department. Locking your room or throwing your things out is illegal.
You can explain to him that you cannot afford 100% at once. Propose something you can afford, maybe ask for time to adjust.
Go to the Rent Control office near you (with your old receipt and any message from your landlord). They will invite him and help you both agree on a fair increment. Usually, an increment should be reasonable, not 100% overnight.
While Rent Control is handling it, quietly start looking at other options, just in case he insists on not renewing your rent after your current rent expires.
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