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Obaa Yaa

Our daughter is pregnant

Dear ObaaYaa,

Our daughter is a third-year student in one of the Senior High Schools in the country and we have the conviction that she will complete with good grades.

Unfortunately, we have received information from the school authorities that our daughter is four months pregnant and it is prudent to inform us.

Though the school authorities have not suggested any solution to the problem, neighbours and some friends who have heard about the case have asked that we should quietly abort the pregnancy for our daughter to continue her education without interruption.

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They argue that since she is too young, she may probably not be capable of taking good care of the baby by herself. They say we should consider the education of our daughter more important so we should safeguard her future.

Though my religion forbids abortion, l am of the view that our daughter is not old enough to bear the pressure of motherhood, therefore, she should be assisted in this case.

Is my opinion good or appropriate? I wish to hear from you.

Joseph, Accra.

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Dear Joseph,

I quite agree with you that education is one of the best gifts parents must give their children in order to sustain their future. Additionally, parents have the responsibility to ensure that they train their children to receive good moral education which is also a necessary requirement for the development of children in the future.

However, this should not be an excuse for you to abort the pregnancy, secondly, your religion also forbids it. In order not to attract the wrath of God, ignore the promptings from others and allow your daughter to give birth.

Your wife should take care of the grandchild after some period to enable your daughter to return to school since you value education.

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Do not tamper with the life of that innocent child since you do not know what that child will become in future.

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Obaa Yaa

 I don’t like his dressing

 Dear Obaa Yaa,

I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.

He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.

At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.

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Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.

And to add salt to injury, my sis­ter is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?

Alodia, Accra.

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Dear Alodia,

IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.

You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.

On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.

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The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send sig­nals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.

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Obaa Yaa

My mum sleeps with other men

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrass­ment to my family, and I need your advice.

She is single and in my neigh­borhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.

Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.

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Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?

I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.

I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.

T.K, Bantama.

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Dear T.K

There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.

That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.

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Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.

Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.

I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a re­sponsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleep­ing around.

You can also report her be­haviour to your family head to talk to her.

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