Obaa Yaa
My sister is pregnant for a married man
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My younger sister, 26, is two months pregnant for a married man. The man is rich and responsible and can take care of my sister and the child but he is, at the same time, a close family friend who our parents respect so much.
My confused sister has told me she wants to keep the pregnancy but the man wants her to abort it. I am equally disturbed because our parents must not discover that my sister is pregnant for our family friend else hell would break loose.
Again, the married man responsible for the pregnancy says his family will fall apart if the truth is told. My sister has sought my advice on this but I do not know what to tell her. Please help me to advise her.
Mavis,
Dodowa.
Dear Mavis,
This appears to be tough but it can be resolved amicably. But first of all, abortion should not be an option. An innocent soul has nothing to do with an illicit affair between two adults. Your sister should keep the baby and gather the courage to tell your parents what has happened.
There would be initial resentment from your parents but this it would eventually fade away. The married man is only finding an excuse to make your sister abort the baby but she must not allow that to happen.
The ‘family friend’ should be ready to face the consequences of his actions. Perhaps he may convince his wife to allow him marry your sister as a second woman.
Obaa Yaa
I am sexually attracted to children
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young man residing in Tamale. I am 40 years old and I have got my own business which is going on successfully.
The nature of my job had made me richer and am able to afford anything that I want.
My only problem is that I need a partner but I don’t fall in love with matured women. I am attracted to children.
I have had an encounter with so many women who are ‘marriage materials and type’ but none of them touch my heart.
In my previous relationship, the girl I dated was 15 years. She took me as a big brother but to me she was my lover.
Now that she is 22 and I can marry her, I have lost interest in her.
Obaa Yaa, what do you think is actually wrong with me? Is it normal? How can I have a partner if I continue to feel this way?
Dabo, Tamale.
Dear Dabo,
I don’t even know how to start this conversation. It is not everything that your heart desires that you should go for.
You need to understand that your desire for children sexually is criminal under the laws of this land so it should not be entertained.
I suggest you seek the assistance of psychologist to advise you or else you might end up in jail.
You might be suffering from pedophilia which is a condition of being sexually attracted to children. You need psychiatric help.
I suggest you also speak to your pastors to help you in prayers, in case it might be spiritual.
Obaa Yaa
The banker deceived me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I fell in love with a banker who told me he wasn’t married and therefore, wanted to marry me.
We started going out and spending time together. He went to the extent of going to see my parents for the engagement list.
It was only after I got pregnant when he confessed he was already married and could not afford to marry me as a second wife.
The problem is that for the past five years, this man has refused to provide for the upkeep of the child.
He is not showing any commitments towards the child and making things difficult for me.
I am currently finding it difficult to take care of the child’s feeding and clothing.
My child is very brilliant at school and my fear is that I cannot give him the best of education since I am not working.
Prisca, Dodowa.
Dear Prisca,
Your story is a sad and unfortunate one. He just ‘toyed’ with you and was successful.
It’s about time women check about the men who propose to them.
And in the first place, why were you intimate with him, knowing very well that you were not married?
Report the matter to the Domestic Violence and Victims Support Unit (DOVVSU) of the Ghana Police Service, formerly known as Women and Juvenile Unit (WAJU) immediately.
They would summon him and question him about the upkeep of his child and employ legal means to make him accept responsibility for the child.
