Obaa Yaa
Should l accept his proposal?
We have been good friends from primary school through to the tertiary and a lot of friends predict that we are good couples in the making.
My friend has been in a stable relationship for many years and friends have concluded that the two love birds will definitely make a good couple.
Unfortunately, close to the end of our studies in the university, my friend suddenly allowed herself to be influenced by a rich man who visited the son on campus.
From the beginning, l thought this interaction would not cause any problem, but it has degenerated into a serious amorous affair.
Now, my friend has decided to leave her longtime friend for this rich man. My repeated appeals and pieces of advice could not help change her mind.
Secondly, her boyfriend who knows me as her best friend, continues to spend sleepless nights on the telephone with intermittent sobs, pleading with me to talk to her to rescind her decision and return to him.
Aware that all his efforts would not work and that my friend was determined to go ahead with the proposed wedding with the rich man, the boyfriend’s attention is now on me.
According to him, having observed me all these years, he has come to the conclusion that l will be the best replacement for my friend. He has promised to see my parents in the shortest period should l accept his proposal.
When l objected, he said it was my friend who abrogated the friendship and that he has decided to pick me as a good replacement, adding that l should not disappoint him either.
Meanwhile, this is a serious gentleman who is capable of becoming a good husband in the future.
Should l accept his proposal?
Nancy, Cape Coast.
Dear Nancy,
This is a thought-provoking issue which ought to be handled by an objective mind and better management for a good result.
I can envisage the pressure on you and the confused state in which you find yourself.
Though you are not responsible for the break in their relationship, you should not accept the offer from this gentleman because it will come with unexpected problems.
Judging from how close she was with this gentleman, one cannot rule out an intimate relationship, a situation which has the potential to break your friendship with your best friend.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I wrote sometime back in 2024 to discuss an ordeal I went through. I contracted a sexually transmitted disease (STD) when I was doing my national service. Initially, I thought it was a normal sickness, so I visited a nearby hospital for treatment. I still feel itching and pains in my manhood.
I began to worry about the whole situation. I wrote to you and you directed me to see a specialist. The doctor did what he could, but the disease still persists. I have also gone through a lab test which shows that there is nothing wrong with me. A few doctors and pharmacists I contacted claim it could be psychological.
There is a sore at the tip of my male organ, and I am disturbed. Not only do I find it difficult to urinate, but it gives me continual sharp waste pain. Currently, I’m not only going through serious physical pains but psychological, because I cannot concentrate on my job for five minutes. I have also been praying and fasting. Can this be spiritual?
Mawuli, Keta
Dear Mawuli,
I hope you are doing well. I will advise you to take your medication regularly. There is still hope for your situation. See a urologist at the Korle-Bu Teaching Hospital for assistance.
I cannot say if your condition is spiritual or not. However, do not stop praying to God. Your miracle may just be on the way.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I’m a lady in my late 30s who wants to give love a second chance, despite all the pain and scars love has caused me.
Tony was just a new staff my company recruited to work in my department. We became friends, and our friendship became stronger when we realised we were both of the same tribe. We fell madly in love, and dating each other was the best option. I got pregnant and less than a month later, we did our traditional wedding and later signed in court.
I found out that my husband, Tony, had a wife and a child in the United Kingdom (UK) when I was eight months pregnant and five months married. What should I do?
Patricia, North Kaneshie
My dear Patricia,
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It takes a lot of courage to open up about your pain. It sounds like you’ve been through a really tough experience with Tony.
First, let’s acknowledge your strength and resilience. You’ve been through a lot, and you’re still standing. That says a lot about your character.
It sounds like Tony presented himself as a good man, and you believed him. You connected well and he seemed to have good family values, but it turns out he was hiding a big secret.
My advice to you is to take time to process your emotions. It’s okay to feel angry, hurt, and confused, but allow yourself to grieve the loss of the relationship and the future you thought you had.
You might want to consider seeking support from loved ones, a therapist, or a support group. Talking through your feelings can really help.
In terms of the next steps, you may consider getting legal advice to understand your rights and options. As a pregnant woman, you have certain rights, and it’s essential to prioritise your well-being and the baby’s well-being.
