Obaa Yaa
Should l accept his proposal?
We have been good friends from primary school through to the tertiary and a lot of friends predict that we are good couples in the making.
My friend has been in a stable relationship for many years and friends have concluded that the two love birds will definitely make a good couple.
Unfortunately, close to the end of our studies in the university, my friend suddenly allowed herself to be influenced by a rich man who visited the son on campus.
From the beginning, l thought this interaction would not cause any problem, but it has degenerated into a serious amorous affair.
Now, my friend has decided to leave her longtime friend for this rich man. My repeated appeals and pieces of advice could not help change her mind.
Secondly, her boyfriend who knows me as her best friend, continues to spend sleepless nights on the telephone with intermittent sobs, pleading with me to talk to her to rescind her decision and return to him.
Aware that all his efforts would not work and that my friend was determined to go ahead with the proposed wedding with the rich man, the boyfriend’s attention is now on me.
According to him, having observed me all these years, he has come to the conclusion that l will be the best replacement for my friend. He has promised to see my parents in the shortest period should l accept his proposal.
When l objected, he said it was my friend who abrogated the friendship and that he has decided to pick me as a good replacement, adding that l should not disappoint him either.
Meanwhile, this is a serious gentleman who is capable of becoming a good husband in the future.
Should l accept his proposal?
Nancy, Cape Coast.
Dear Nancy,
This is a thought-provoking issue which ought to be handled by an objective mind and better management for a good result.
I can envisage the pressure on you and the confused state in which you find yourself.
Though you are not responsible for the break in their relationship, you should not accept the offer from this gentleman because it will come with unexpected problems.
Judging from how close she was with this gentleman, one cannot rule out an intimate relationship, a situation which has the potential to break your friendship with your best friend.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am torn between two guys and finding it very difficult to make a choice.
I have known the first guy for three years. We respect each other a lot. We started as just friends, but we recently began dating. Even though we don’t have much in common, he makes me feel loved and special.
Interestingly, I met the second guy only two weeks ago through a mutual friend. From the beginning, it has been nothing but good vibes between us. I enjoy his company, and we share many things in common. He is basically my type of man, both physically and mentally.
Now I feel like I have to choose, but I am lost and unsure who to go for.
—Esinam, Legon
Dear Esinam,
When it comes to love, everyone must take time to think carefully. You’re not just choosing a partner—you are choosing a potential husband and the father of your children, regardless of your current feelings.
Consider your priorities. Which of the two aligns better with your values, goals, and aspirations?
You might also reflect on:
- Emotional stability — Who offers long-term security and respect?
- Compatibility — Who truly understands you and shares your vision?
- Consistency — Who has shown genuine care over time?
- Future plans — Who fits into the life you want to build?
Attraction and good vibes are important, but so are character, compatibility, and long-term intentions.
Take your time, listen to your inner peace, and choose the one who fits not just your heart today, but your future tomorrow.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 22-year-old lady at the University of Ghana, Legon. I realised my Grade Point Average (GPA) was very good and could even get a First Class if I put in more effort.
It is rather unfortunate that in Level 300, I have noticed a significant drop in my academic performance, which has left me both confused and worried about my future.
The increased workload and expectations at this level have been overwhelming, making it challenging to balance demanding courses with extracurricular activities and personal responsibilities.
This pressure has fuelled my anxiety, making it even harder to maintain my grades. The coursework is substantially more demanding, and I often find myself struggling to keep pace.
This sudden shift has been disheartening, and I can’t help but worry about the long-term impact it may have on my future.
Chelsea, Accra.
Dear Chelsea,
Although you have realised a significant drop in your grades, it does not mean that you should throw in the towel. See it as a signal to change your approach to studies.
Identify the subjects or topics you are struggling with and put in more effort. Create a study timetable to manage your time well, making sure you revise regularly instead of waiting until exams.
Don’t hesitate to ask teachers for clarification or join a study group with friends who understand the subject better.
Also, cut down distractions such as too much time on the phone or the use of social media when studying.
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https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VbBElzjInlqHhl1aTU27
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