Obaa Yaa
He is too bossy
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I AM in a relationship with a man I love very much but he upsets me a lot with his bossy attitude.
He also expects me to come to his house to clean-up, wash and iron for him regularly.
When I fail to do so, sometimes he threatens to break-up with me, saying I am lazy.
The idea of marrying this man frightens me sometimes, or am I the one giving out wrong signals?
Abi, Dansoman.
Dear Abi,
ATTITUDES in a relationship are often set unconsciously before a couple marry. Greetings.
In marriages one tries to adjust and stop living the pretense, he or she disappoints the other partner, thus causing problems.
Your man must understand that marriage or a premarital relationship only works well on a foundation of mutual respect and partnership.
He, therefore, should show gratitude when you do him the favour of cleaning up for him. He has no right to throw a tantrum when you don’t, especially when he has not even married you.
What is really disturbing is the fact that he gives you the options to be a ‘good servant’ or lose him.
A relationship is not a ‘master and servant’ affair. You would be better off losing him than being in a relationship where your partner or spouse regards you only as a servant.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 20 and she is 19. We have been lovers for the past four months and have promised to get married to each other.
We love each other badly that one cannot leave the other for long. Our relatives know about our affair except her grandmother who will be in the country soon.
My problem is that, I doubt if the grandmother will be excited about this relationship. Her grandmother is very strict and I doubt if this relationship can be successful.
Her grandmother has been like a mother and everything to her, so her final decision may count.
We have promised each other to stay holy and clean.
Lartey,
Sunyani
Dear Lartey,
I don’t think your fears are justified if the girl’s parent do not object to your relationship with her.
What makes you think her grandmother will oppose the relationship if her parents endorse it?
Be positive about the relationship. There is no cause for alarm.
I am very happy you guys are staying holy and clean until marriage.
Both of you are student and need to be careful about any decision you take.
I believe you should try as much as possible to support each other and stay away from any negative act.
I have a girlfriend who is ‘allergic’ to me and ‘allergic’ to men in general.
Because of this, I barely touch her. I do not sit too close to her. I do not even hold her hands for long.
We have tried before. Even recently, we tried again. At first, things looked normal.
Then suddenly she lifted her hands and started scratching her back aggressively. We stopped immediately. Moments later, she ran to the bathroom and started vomiting.
She spent almost four hours there, weak, nauseous, and drained.
Watching someone you love suffer while you cannot do anything about it is painful. Is it a curse or an allergy?
Hello Christian,
What you’re describing sounds frightening and emotionally exhausting for both of you. But it is important not to jump to the idea of a curse.
Severe reactions after touch, closeness, stress, or intimacy can sometimes be linked to medical conditions, allergies, anxiety responses, trauma, or psychosomatic reactions.
The safest and most loving step is encouraging her to see qualified doctors, especially an allergist and mental health professional, so the cause can be properly understood.
Your patience already shows deep care. Do not blame yourself or search for supernatural explanations first.
Focus on support, medical guidance, emotional safety, and honest communication while protecting both her health and your relationship.
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