Obaa Yaa
She must leave my house
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Having prayed seven years for the gift of the womb, l was blessed with a bouncy baby boy. This has brought about the need to arrange for a babysitter to step in when my maternity leave expires after three months.
Very helpful as she has always been, my mother arranged for a lady who has started work with zeal.
I was really impressed with the performance of this lady, and thought she was the type who l could confidently hand over my house schedules to and be rest assured that everything would be done according to my desire.
The sort of love that has developed between this lady and my first child is quite pleasing and attracts the attention of all visitors to the house.
Pleased with the performance of this lady, l once mentioned to my husband that it would be ideal if we arranged for an entrepreneurial skill training in addition to the monthly allowance we pay her.
This is to serve as a way of compensation for the invaluable services she has been rendering ever since she stepped foot in our house.
Unfortunately, reports from different sources had revealed that this lady was secretly comforting my husband in bed.
Without trying to verify the authenticity of these gossips, l am inclined to believe them because of my husband’s sudden change in character towards this lady.
My husband used to complain bitterly about all that this girl did, but he surprisingly sees no fault in this girl any longer.
What should l do to save my marriage?
Cynthia, Accra.
Dear Cynthia,
This is a dicey issue which must be carefully weighed and the possible options considered before you make a formal allegation.
You should imagine how embarrassing you will feel if this allegation turns out to be unfounded.On the contrary, you may end up worsening an already suspicious atmosphere in the house.
Any rational person with a good conscience will definitely feel uneasy when such matters are being alluded to in a conversation.
This is an opportunity for you to test their bodylanguage at different times to know their reactions. This will give you a clear picture of what is at stake, together with any further investigations you may decide to undertake.
Having done your underground checks, the next step for you to take is to expel your babysitter. Though it will be a difficult decision in view of the invaluable services that she has been rendering, you have to do it in order to save your marriage.
Know that it is not all men who have the ability to keep the marital bed intact.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I wrote sometime back in 2024 to discuss an ordeal I went through. I contracted a sexually transmitted disease (STD) when I was doing my national service. Initially, I thought it was a normal sickness, so I visited a nearby hospital for treatment. I still feel itching and pains in my manhood.
I began to worry about the whole situation. I wrote to you and you directed me to see a specialist. The doctor did what he could, but the disease still persists. I have also gone through a lab test which shows that there is nothing wrong with me. A few doctors and pharmacists I contacted claim it could be psychological.
There is a sore at the tip of my male organ, and I am disturbed. Not only do I find it difficult to urinate, but it gives me continual sharp waste pain. Currently, I’m not only going through serious physical pains but psychological, because I cannot concentrate on my job for five minutes. I have also been praying and fasting. Can this be spiritual?
Mawuli, Keta
Dear Mawuli,
I hope you are doing well. I will advise you to take your medication regularly. There is still hope for your situation. See a urologist at the Korle-Bu Teaching Hospital for assistance.
I cannot say if your condition is spiritual or not. However, do not stop praying to God. Your miracle may just be on the way.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I’m a lady in my late 30s who wants to give love a second chance, despite all the pain and scars love has caused me.
Tony was just a new staff my company recruited to work in my department. We became friends, and our friendship became stronger when we realised we were both of the same tribe. We fell madly in love, and dating each other was the best option. I got pregnant and less than a month later, we did our traditional wedding and later signed in court.
I found out that my husband, Tony, had a wife and a child in the United Kingdom (UK) when I was eight months pregnant and five months married. What should I do?
Patricia, North Kaneshie
My dear Patricia,
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It takes a lot of courage to open up about your pain. It sounds like you’ve been through a really tough experience with Tony.
First, let’s acknowledge your strength and resilience. You’ve been through a lot, and you’re still standing. That says a lot about your character.
It sounds like Tony presented himself as a good man, and you believed him. You connected well and he seemed to have good family values, but it turns out he was hiding a big secret.
My advice to you is to take time to process your emotions. It’s okay to feel angry, hurt, and confused, but allow yourself to grieve the loss of the relationship and the future you thought you had.
You might want to consider seeking support from loved ones, a therapist, or a support group. Talking through your feelings can really help.
In terms of the next steps, you may consider getting legal advice to understand your rights and options. As a pregnant woman, you have certain rights, and it’s essential to prioritise your well-being and the baby’s well-being.
