Obaa Yaa

She doesn’t seem to love me

Published

2 years ago

November 18, 2023

Dear Obaa Yaa

I am a final year student at the Pentecost University where I met a lady and fell in love with her during my internship.

Though I have expressed my feelings to her, she insists we move our relationship at a steady pace.

Honestly, I am not worried about her suggestion for that approach, so far as the relationship is concerned. Why should I pretend to love and be her friend when my feelings for her are more than that?

Meanwhile, there are moments she wants us to go out and have fun, yet when I make advances towards her, she brushes me aside.

What should I do?

Kofi, Accra.

****

Dear Kofi,

I don’t believe you have a problem as your letter explains.

There is nothing wrong to fall in love with this lady and tell her about your feelings.

It is interesting to know that this lady has adopted an intelligent approach of building the friendship gradually.

Note that this relationship could progress into marriage if things go on planned. Do not forget that marriage is a life-long journey which demands you to take the right decision at the right time so that you may not regret in future.

I think her decision to adopt a gradual approach to the relationship will prevent the two of you from taking hasty decisions.

Going out for fun forms part of the gradual approach in a relationship.

Allow her to take a decision at the appropriate time as you do well to also control your feelings.

Obaa Yaa

He introduced me wrongly

Published

5 days ago

April 11, 2026

WeeklySpectator

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I visited my boyfriend at his office only to meet him and a young lady having a serious chat.

He politely introduced the lady to me as his workmate and also introduced me as a friend without telling the lady that I am his lover.

When he came home and I went over to spend the night, he seemed not to find any fault with what he did.

He was rather giving attitude and pretending as if I don’t even exist in his life.

I then told him I was not happy that he did not give me the proper acknowledgment as his lover.

Do you think he has something up his sleeve and did not want the lady he called workmate to know that we are lovers?

Greetings,
Araba, Mamobi.

Dear Araba,

FOR very good reasons, certain individuals would not want to publicise their love affairs. They believe love is a private matter and not for public consumption, and would prefer to run their relationships quietly.

Others also think that once they are not married and have not found the right person, there is no need introducing anyone until they are fully committed and envision a lifetime relationship.

So you cannot immediately judge the motive of your boyfriend for not introducing you appropriately, although it is also possible that he could have feelings for the other lady.

However, do not get worked up. Stay calm, and with time, the truth will become clear.

Obaa Yaa

My wife wants 2 more children

Published

5 days ago

April 11, 2026

WeeklySpectator

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I HAVE been married for five years with three children. They are two boys and a girl.

Due to the economic situation prevailing in the country, I advised my wife to stop making babies. This is to enable us to cater for them and give them the best of education.

Unfortunately, my wife is not in agreement with the proposal but is bent on having two more children before she ends it.

As a result, she has stopped taking the family planning precautions and wants us to have unprotected sex.

I am contemplating going in for vasectomy which will make me unable to produce children but all the same enjoy our sex life.

My fear is that if my wife discovers that she is not getting pregnant, she may be tempted to cheat on me.

Please advise me.

Amevi, Ho.

Dear Amevi,

THE Bible says the two shall be one. In my opinion, one person cannot decide on the number of children to have.

There must be a mutual understanding between the two of you. You must be more communicative to agree on what will suit both of you.

You must be able to convince your wife that the economic situation is not favourable for more children. And you must make her know that until your (both of you) financial circumstances improve, more children will be a burden on the family.

If she insists on more children, then she must justify it with an increase in her income and her willingness to take up the extra burden.

If she cannot justify it, then you can go for your vasectomy and let her know. That way, I think she cannot cheat on you and bring you a pregnancy that belongs to another person.