My mum wants me to end my relationship

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am a 26 year old driver, and she is 24 and an apprentice seamstress. We have known each other for three years.

I was having launch when my girl entered with another man but she didn’t see me.

When I asked who the man was, she said he was from her hometown and was invited by him for a drink. I just slapped her and she left.

Obaa, I had seen this man with my girlfriend another night and when I questioned them, he tried to fight.

I slapped him and he went to the police station to report that someone had assaulted him and stolen his necklace, watch and an amount of money.

The matter got to my mother and I was asked to pay Gh¢8,000 for assault.

My mother says, I should break up with the girl but I love her and can’t do that. What should I do?

Efe, Mallam.

*****

Dear Isaac,

Your girlfriend needs to be talked to instead of slaps. Let her understand that you felt threatened by the man who is not a mutual friend to the two of you.

You must explain to her that even though this man is from her town, she should have introduced him to you and also make an effort not to be with him at places and times that arouse suspicion.

This would be the first part of saving your relationship. The second part is that you need to control your temper as violence would always land you in trouble.

Finally you need to reassure your mother that you would never act the way you did again.

Mummy has disowned me

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am a 25 year old man who completed Kwame Nkrumah University of Science and Technology (KNUST) last year.

I had a confrontation with my mother after stealing her money to travel abroad; but this failed.

As a result, she has disowned me. My brother and I have sought the assistance of elders in our family and pastors to reconcile us but she has rejected all these.

She doesn’t talk to me nor cook for me. We leave like strangers in our home and I am uncomfortable.

I have pleaded with her countless times, but she doesn’t give ear to my plea.

I am burdened with this problem and I can’t cope anymore. I am sad and miserable. What should I do?

Ofori, Brekum.

Dear Ofori,

I guess you are just paying the wages of your sins. Come to terms with the fact that you have brought all of this upon yourself. Since you are so miserable, begin to work on yourself and turn away from your deeds.

You have already taken the first step by recognising your fault.

Now, begin to seek counselling from your church pastor and family elders.

When your mother sees and hears that you are now a changed person, I believe she will accept you back.

Obaa Yaa

I saw her with four boys

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am a boy of 25 years and she is a 19- year old Junior High School graduate. We are neighbours and our relationship started a year ago. I made her understand that I am a Christian and therefore, our relationship would be platonic.

Everything was going on smoothly until I started getting complaints from her relations and friends about her immorality. When I confronted her, she denied it.

On June 30 this year, I personally saw her in the company of four boys. I reported her to my father and when he asked her, she could not utter a word.

On our way out, a man called her and she excused herself but did not return till later in the night.

I broke up with her the same day because I couldn’t stand the betrayal.

But my problem now is that she is going around insulting me.

I find this really embarrassing.

Nii, La

Dear Nii,

Try and get your parents or other family members to get in touch with the girl’s family to talk to her.

Besides at 25 years, you are still young. Concentrate on your studies or whatever you want to do in life for a career and stop getting involved in affairs of the opposite sex until you are ready to marry.