Obaa Yaa
I love him and his child
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We met in church and have since become very close to the extent that people refer to us as siblings. Though we stay far from each other, we make time to meet at the least opportunity during the day.
With time, l got to know that he has a child with a lady but has not married her due to the threats he had received from her parents.
He told me he had lost interest in the lady because of the sudden change in her behaviour.
What made matters worse was that her parents said they would not allow me to marry their daughter because l was poor and she would suffer if l married her.
Though matters had gone this way, he loved this lady and they often talked about their child. The two of us have decided not to indulge in sex throughout the period of our courtship and thank God we have kept to this promise.
We enjoyed the best of life, no quarrels and we always tried to patch up any misunderstanding between us.
My fear is that since l have not received any confirmation from him, don’t you think he can possibly go back for this girl, since they have a child?
Mary, Accra.
Dear Mary,
I think you have met a good young man who can support you as a reliable husband.
Judging from what you have said about the two former lovers, the possibility of the two coming together is great.
Secondly, the young man’s fortune could change to pave the way for re-marriage. Should this happen, you have nothing to lose because you have played it safe by not indulging in sex, which could probably cloud your ability to take the right decision.
This lady could easily convince people that you have forcefully taken her husband from her.
You could be jumping before the horse, therefore, control yourself and see how things will unfold as time goes by.
The Woman Seduced Me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old student who lost both parents at the age of 16.
I stayed with my late mother’s friend, a woman about 40 years old who lives in the same area.
After the death of my parents, she told me to come and stay with her. She promised to take good care of me because of the good relationship she had with my mother.
I moved from my former house to the woman’s place. In fact, she was kind to me and gave me all that I needed.
About three months later, the woman forced me to have sex with her. Since then, she has been making advances toward me and I am uncomfortable.
Obaa Yaa, how can an innocent boy like me escape from this trap?
Ramsey, Kasoa New Market.
Dear Ramsey,
YOU are indeed in trouble. If a woman who has assumed the position of a mother in your life has seduced you, then it is virtually equivalent to incest.
I suggest you begin to think about leaving the place.
Where are your relatives? Can’t any of them offer you a place, especially since both parents are late?
That should have been your first step instead of moving in with a friend.
Meanwhile, be on your guard and avoid being caught in any compromising situation with her now that you know what she is capable of.
Ask God for protection as you search for a new home. Commit your entire situation to prayer.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I AM 18 years old and she is also 18 years.
We have been lovers for the past two years.
I have a friend who knew about our relationship. This best friend of mine came home from school with his friend with the intention of giving him a girlfriend from his hometown.
This best friend of mine introduced my girlfriend to him and when I returned from school I was told about this sad issue.
I asked the girl and she replied negatively for several times. I was then advised by my friend to stop asking her about it.
For the second time my friend came with the same boy, but this time, I was there and in fact I really saw what happened and it was too horrifying.
Obaa Yaa, I made my mind to fight both boys but I later changed my mind.
She is very supportive and assists me with some of my needs in school.
What should I do, Obaa Yaa? She has still been visiting me but I’m worried.
O. D. Kennedy, Koforidua-E/R
Dear Kennedy,
I DOUBT if the person you claim to be your best friend is indeed a friend at all.
Why didn’t you confront him about this?
In any case, you don’t have to worry about her being snatched because it appears she loves you.
The only problem is that you are being over-anxious about the situation and feeling jealous.
For the time being, if you claim the boy trying to give out your girl is your best friend, then confront him and ask him to stop being treacherous — but don’t fight him.
