Obaa Yaa
I am planning to end the marriage
Dear ObaaYaa,
We had a traditional marriage and sealed it with a memorable wedding. The congregation that attended the wedding was suggestive that the ceremony was grand.
God has graciously blessed me with the fruit of the womb with two beautiful daughters in succession.
I lost my job when l was delivered of my second child and things started to change from bad to worse.
At that time, my husband was very caring and constantly responded to the needs of the family, but one year down the lane, things changed when my husband fell in love with another lady at his place of work.
l could not complain because l had no grounds on which to stand.I, therefore, kept quiet until a friend of mine gave me a vivid account of what had gone on for some period.
Though he had denied having an extra marital affairs with her, as most men would do, l later caught him in the comfortable arms of his lover in the woman’s home.
Having discovered this, he packed out of the house and his attitude towards me and the children suddenly changed. He has refused to give me money for the upkeep of the children and has failed to find out about their welfare.
The lady is nine months pregnant and l understand he is happy about this development.
The situation is unbearable and l am contemplating leaving the marriage. Can l carry out my plans?
Francisca, Accra.
Dear Francisca,
It is appropriate to pour out your frustrations and problems which are disturbing your mind at this crucial moment. The austere economic conditions are not favourable and people are taking alternative steps to survive.
Since times are hard and families find it difficult to make ends meet, l would like to suggest that you kindly rescind your decision for now and stay in your marital home for the sake of the children.
Some men who had indulged in extra marital activities, had to eat the humble pie after serious regrets and re-united with their wives.
Your husband could possibly identify his mistake and return to you. When you leave your matrimonial home, he will presume that you are married to another man and would fail to be responsible for the upkeep of the children.
It is ideal that the two of you raise the children together.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
MY fiancé is a journalist with one of the reputable media houses in Ghana.
Plans are far advanced for us to tie the knot but my worry is that he’s always busy and comes home late every evening when I am in bed.
By the nature of his work and schedule, as soon as he comes home, he takes his bath and supper. The next thing is to sleep without spending time with me.
He has no holiday. On Sundays, he goes again to work after church service. I am beginning to entertain some fears that things will get worse when we get married.
I am the type who like to be pampered but my fiancé is not pampering me.
Please advise me to make an informed decision before it becomes too late.
Paulina,
Dodowa.
Dear Paulina,
THERE are no specified working hours for journalists. In short, they are always on the move.
That is why it appears they cannot be good husbands.
And if you want a man who will be at home and pamper you, then a journalist might not suit that purpose, unless he is on leave.
However, I wouldn’t discourage you. Journalists are very interesting people who learn a lot and can help you to widen your outlook.
Don’t look at the romantic aspect of it only; consider the future of the relationship, your self-development and the future of your children. I wish you all the best.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a Christian sister who believe in the biblical code of modest dressing as a mark of a true Christian.
My dress is always the long type, covering my knees.
My boss addressed me yesterday that such dressing was not needed in the company, particularly as a Personal Assistant.
He says my dresses should be office mini type to show my legs to attract a lot of customers since we are in the business of selling.
Obaa Yaa, I am confused about my boss’s demand as this will affect my Christian principle of decent and modest Christian dressing.
Please advise me.
Emefa,
Sogakope.
Dear Emefa,
Normally, Personal Assistants are generally expected to be smart in skirt and top of the same material or white top and blue- black skirt.
Unusually long dresses or skirts do not make Personal Assistant look smart, so employers will normally require that very long dresses are not worn by their PAs.
You could get skirts that are long enough to cover your knees so that your thighs are not exposed. You can look decent in that and do your job.
However, if your particular church does not allow the exposure of even your legs, then the only option is to resign and get another job where your kind of dressing will be tolerated.
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