Obaa Yaa
Can l marry this lady?
This lady and l belonged to the youth group of our church and we became very close in the process and this led me to develop an interest in her.
Going by the advice of my parents that l should do well to keep my moral life above reproach, l ensured that l did not take advantage of any of the girls in church.
I decided to study the lifestyle of this lady after sometime before l will make a definite decision as to whether l will marry her.
With time, l discovered to my surprise that this lazy is the type who will not lift a finger in the house and does not know how to prepare food.
Though l am always in her company together with her elder sister, it has never crossed my mind to propose love to her as a voice kept telling me to take my time.
It was not quite long when l became aware of the enviable qualities in the elder sister and naturally, my attention was drawn to her.
l have decided to marry this elder sister instead of the younger one l had fixed my eyes on.
Though l have made up my mind to marry, l have not disclosed my intention to either of them.
Will l be wrong if l decide to marry this lady instead?
William, Cape Coast.
Dear William,
How l wished the youth copied your example because this is the best way to study people, especially someone you will spend the rest of your life with.
That is why marriage counselors and parents always caution the youth to distant themselves from premarital sex because it is a way of promoting promiscuity and the complex problems associated with it. An intercourse would have made it impossible for you to identify her shortfalls and probably end relations with her.
It would have been impossible for you to marry this second lady if you had had an affair with the younger sister.
You are at liberty to inform this lady of your decision to marry her. The problem would have arisen if you had promised to marry the younger sister who caught your attention at the first instance.
The Woman Seduced Me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old student who lost both parents at the age of 16.
I stayed with my late mother’s friend, a woman about 40 years old who lives in the same area.
After the death of my parents, she told me to come and stay with her. She promised to take good care of me because of the good relationship she had with my mother.
I moved from my former house to the woman’s place. In fact, she was kind to me and gave me all that I needed.
About three months later, the woman forced me to have sex with her. Since then, she has been making advances toward me and I am uncomfortable.
Obaa Yaa, how can an innocent boy like me escape from this trap?
Ramsey, Kasoa New Market.
Dear Ramsey,
YOU are indeed in trouble. If a woman who has assumed the position of a mother in your life has seduced you, then it is virtually equivalent to incest.
I suggest you begin to think about leaving the place.
Where are your relatives? Can’t any of them offer you a place, especially since both parents are late?
That should have been your first step instead of moving in with a friend.
Meanwhile, be on your guard and avoid being caught in any compromising situation with her now that you know what she is capable of.
Ask God for protection as you search for a new home. Commit your entire situation to prayer.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I AM 18 years old and she is also 18 years.
We have been lovers for the past two years.
I have a friend who knew about our relationship. This best friend of mine came home from school with his friend with the intention of giving him a girlfriend from his hometown.
This best friend of mine introduced my girlfriend to him and when I returned from school I was told about this sad issue.
I asked the girl and she replied negatively for several times. I was then advised by my friend to stop asking her about it.
For the second time my friend came with the same boy, but this time, I was there and in fact I really saw what happened and it was too horrifying.
Obaa Yaa, I made my mind to fight both boys but I later changed my mind.
She is very supportive and assists me with some of my needs in school.
What should I do, Obaa Yaa? She has still been visiting me but I’m worried.
O. D. Kennedy, Koforidua-E/R
Dear Kennedy,
I DOUBT if the person you claim to be your best friend is indeed a friend at all.
Why didn’t you confront him about this?
In any case, you don’t have to worry about her being snatched because it appears she loves you.
The only problem is that you are being over-anxious about the situation and feeling jealous.
For the time being, if you claim the boy trying to give out your girl is your best friend, then confront him and ask him to stop being treacherous — but don’t fight him.
