Relationship
Avoiding cheating in your relationship
There is just so much cheating and disloyalty these days in relationships. It would be safe to assume that there is a substantial bulk of people who would willingly cheat in a relationship. And why is that? Well, it can be challenging to give a general answer for all couples. There are just so many variables that go into determining one’s disposition to remain loyal in a relationship or not. But what we can do is spot certain trends that will make it easier for you to gain a better perspective on cheating, and it will allow you to prepare yourself in your relationships better.
Talk about what cheating means to both of you.
You need to be able to define the parameters in your relationship. You both need to talk about what it means to be loyal to each other. You both need to talk about your standards for commitment. You both need to talk about what constitutes cheating in both of your eyes.
Meet each other’s needs as much as possible.
The more you can meet each other’s needs, the less likely you are going to cheat one another. Meeting each other’s needs and expectations breed a sense of contentment. And when you are both contented in your relationship, you won’t go trying to shake anything up.
Do activities that you can bond over as a couple.
Try to connect with one another. When you bond with each other, you get the chance to build the level of intimacy in your relationship. You create a sense of camaraderie, and you act more like a team.
Communicate as much as possible – and listen.
Communication is key. And remember that communication isn’t purely about just saying what’s on your mind and in your heart. It’s also about really being able to listen to each other. It’s about making your partner feel safe to talk to you.
Don’t be possessive or jealous.
The tighter your grip, the more suffocating you become in a relationship. So loosen up a little bit. Let your partner feel free to be their people. Don’t try to imprison them.
Get therapy if you need it.
You have to consider the possibility that you are not able to address all of the problems in your relationship on your own. And that’s okay. There is no shame in seeking outside help, especially from licensed professionals.
Have a healthy attitude towards sex.
Have a healthy and active sex life. The happier you are in the bedroom, the happier the relationship becomes overall.
Be humble and own up to your shortcomings in your relationship.
You aren’t always going to be perfect in your relationship. And the moment you feel that you’re doing everything right, you put yourself at risk of stagnancy. And you never want to stay stagnant in your relationship. You always want to work on something. There is always something that you can be improving on.
Source: www.gistping.com
Marriage is meant to be a safe place where two people build, grow, and support each other. But what happens when one partner’s need for admiration, control, and self-importance slowly erodes the emotional safety of the home?
As a marriage counsellor and mental health professional, I meet women who say, “I feel like I’m walking on eggshells at home,” or “No matter what I do, it’s never enough.” Often, what they are describing are patterns linked to living with a narcissistic husband.
Narcissism exists on a spectrum. Not every selfish or proud man is a clinical narcissist. But when these traits become consistent patterns that harm your mental health, self-worth, and sense of reality, it is time to pay attention.
Here are seven realistic signs you may be married to a narcissistic husband:
1. Everything is about him
Conversations, decisions, and even your achievements somehow circle back to him. If you share good news, he quickly shifts the focus to his own success or minimizes yours.
Over time, you feel invisible in your own marriage. A healthy marriage makes space for both partners’ voices. A narcissistic dynamic makes space for only one.
2. You feel constantly blamed and criticised
No matter how hard you try, you are made to feel inadequate. He may use subtle sarcasm, public criticism, or outright blame to keep you off balance. This is not constructive feedback—it is a tactic to control and diminish you. You begin to question your memory, judgment, and worth. In psychology, this is called “gaslighting,” and it is a common tool in narcissistic relationships.
3. Empathy is missing when you need it most
When you are sick, stressed, or grieving, a narcissistic husband often appears emotionally distant or irritated. He struggles to validate your feelings unless it benefits him. Real empathy requires stepping outside oneself. Narcissism keeps the focus inward, making emotional support feel transactional or absent.
4. Control disguised as “Love” or “Protection”
He may monitor your phone, dictate how you dress, or isolate you from friends and family under the guise of caring for you. Healthy love promotes freedom and trust. Narcissistic control seeks to keep you dependent and manageable. Over time, this erodes your independence and confidence.
5. Love feels conditional and performance-based
Affection, praise, and attention come when you meet his expectations. When you do not, you face silent treatment, anger, or withdrawal. This creates a cycle where you work harder to “earn” love that should be freely given. Marriage is not a performance stage—it’s a partnership.
6. He avoids accountability
When issues arise, he rarely apologizes sincerely or takes responsibility. Instead, he deflects, blames you, or rewrites the story to make himself the victim. A marriage cannot heal if one partner refuses to own their part. Accountability is the foundation of trust.
7. Your mental health is declining
Perhaps the clearest sign is what is happening inside you. Do you feel anxious, drained, confused, or less confident than when you got married? Living with chronic emotional invalidation and control takes a toll on your nervous system and self-esteem. Your mental health is a reliable indicator that something is wrong.
What can you do?
Recognizing these signs is not about labeling and leaving. It is about seeing clearly so you can make informed choices for your mental and emotional well-being.
1. Seek clarity through professional support: A trained counsellor can help you separate reality from manipulation and rebuild your self-worth.
2. Set healthy boundaries: Boundaries are not punishment. They are protection for your peace and dignity.
3. Build a support system: Isolate yourself less. Share with trusted friends, family, or support groups. You are not crazy, and you are not alone.
4. Prioritise your mental health: Therapy, journaling, prayer, and self-care are not selfish. They are necessary for survival and clarity.
Marriage should add to your life, not subtract from your sense of self. If you recognise these patterns, know this: naming the problem is the first step toward healing, whether that healing happens within the marriage or through creating a safer life for yourself.
Source:
Counselor Prince Offei is a leading Mental Health Professional, Marriage Counsellor, Author, ADR Expert/Arbitrator, and Spectator Newspaper Columnist. He writes on relationships, marriage, parenting, special needs support, and their connection to mental health.
Marriage is meant to be a safe place where two people build, grow, and support each other. But what happens when one partner’s need for admiration, control, and self-importance slowly erodes the emotional safety of the home?
As a marriage counsellor and mental health professional, I meet women who say, “I feel like I’m walking on eggshells at home,” or “No matter what I do, it’s never enough.” Often, what they are describing are patterns linked to living with a narcissistic husband.
Narcissism exists on a spectrum. Not every selfish or proud man is a clinical narcissist. But when these traits become consistent patterns that harm your mental health, self-worth, and sense of reality, it is time to pay attention.
Here are seven realistic signs you may be married to a narcissistic husband:
1. Everything is about him
Conversations, decisions, and even your achievements somehow circle back to him. If you share good news, he quickly shifts the focus to his own success or minimizes yours.
Over time, you feel invisible in your own marriage. A healthy marriage makes space for both partners’ voices. A narcissistic dynamic makes space for only one.
2. You feel constantly blamed and criticised
No matter how hard you try, you are made to feel inadequate. He may use subtle sarcasm, public criticism, or outright blame to keep you off balance. This is not constructive feedback—it is a tactic to control and diminish you. You begin to question your memory, judgment, and worth. In psychology, this is called “gaslighting,” and it is a common tool in narcissistic relationships.
3. Empathy is missing when you need it most
When you are sick, stressed, or grieving, a narcissistic husband often appears emotionally distant or irritated. He struggles to validate your feelings unless it benefits him. Real empathy requires stepping outside oneself. Narcissism keeps the focus inward, making emotional support feel transactional or absent.
4. Control disguised as “Love” or “Protection”
He may monitor your phone, dictate how you dress, or isolate you from friends and family under the guise of caring for you. Healthy love promotes freedom and trust. Narcissistic control seeks to keep you dependent and manageable. Over time, this erodes your independence and confidence.
5. Love feels conditional and performance-based
Affection, praise, and attention come when you meet his expectations. When you do not, you face silent treatment, anger, or withdrawal. This creates a cycle where you work harder to “earn” love that should be freely given. Marriage is not a performance stage—it’s a partnership.
6. He avoids accountability
When issues arise, he rarely apologizes sincerely or takes responsibility. Instead, he deflects, blames you, or rewrites the story to make himself the victim. A marriage cannot heal if one partner refuses to own their part. Accountability is the foundation of trust.
7. Your mental health is declining
Perhaps the clearest sign is what is happening inside you. Do you feel anxious, drained, confused, or less confident than when you got married? Living with chronic emotional invalidation and control takes a toll on your nervous system and self-esteem. Your mental health is a reliable indicator that something is wrong.
What can you do?
Recognizing these signs is not about labeling and leaving. It is about seeing clearly so you can make informed choices for your mental and emotional well-being.
1. Seek clarity through professional support: A trained counsellor can help you separate reality from manipulation and rebuild your self-worth.
2. Set healthy boundaries: Boundaries are not punishment. They are protection for your peace and dignity.
3. Build a support system: Isolate yourself less. Share with trusted friends, family, or support groups. You are not crazy, and you are not alone.
4. Prioritise your mental health: Therapy, journaling, prayer, and self-care are not selfish. They are necessary for survival and clarity.
Marriage should add to your life, not subtract from your sense of self. If you recognise these patterns, know this: naming the problem is the first step toward healing, whether that healing happens within the marriage or through creating a safer life for yourself.
Source:
Counselor Prince Offei is a leading Mental Health Professional, Marriage Counsellor, Author, ADR Expert/Arbitrator, and Spectator Newspaper Columnist. He writes on relationships, marriage, parenting, special needs support, and their connection to mental health.
