Relationship

Some signs he only sees you as a backup plan

Published

4 years ago

November 13, 2021

He doesn’t make an effort to plan your dates. HE really isn’t invested in the idea of getting close to you. Everyone knows that couples do get closer to each other through dates. It’s when two people spend time with each other where they really establish and build a connection together. But he’s not so interested in getting closer to you. He’s probably not so interested in getting to know you better at all. And that’s why he doesn’t put any effort into planning dates with you. For him, you can come and go as you please.
He makes it so hard for you to get a hold of him whenever you’re not together. He’s practically on another planet whenever you’re not together. He never makes it easy for you to reach him. The truth is that he doesn’t want to be reached at all. He’s spending time away from you because he would rather not be in your company. And that’s why he’s making it hard for you to reach him.
You find it so hard to get him to open up about anything. He isn’t going to want to tell you anything about his life at all. He will pretend to listen to you talk and talk about yourself as a person, but he isn’t going to return the favour.
He will do nothing to give away how he feels about you. He isn’t going to want you to know just how he feels about you. He doesn’t want you to know that he’s not all that interested in you. He wants to keep you on the leash, and so he will do just enough to make you think that you have a chance with him. But he isn’t going to give you too much to the point that you feel like you have him in the palm of your hand. He is always going to keep you guessing because he doesn’t want you to feel comfortable with him.
He looks more at his phone than he does at you when you’re together. Another sign that he just really isn’t invested in establishing a connection with you is when he is only on his phone for whatever time you spend together. He is frankly more interested in finding out about the things that are going on in his news feed than he is about the things that you might want to tell him. His phone gets more intimate time with him than you do.
He is very strict about his privacy with you. He doesn’t want to let you in because he doesn’t trust you enough. He doesn’t want you to feel like you are afforded an intimate spot in his life. He doesn’t want you to believe that you are unique to him at all. And that’s why he’s going to be very private and secretive with you. He will not want you to enter his apartment, or at the very least, he will not want you to spend the night. He won’t want you browsing through his phone or personal belongings. He doesn’t feel that level of comfort with you yet.
Source: dreamyhub.com

Relationship

Tips on Building and Maintaining Healthy Relationships

Published

2 weeks ago

February 21, 2026

WeeklySpectator

Building and maintaining healthy relationships is an important part of looking after our mental health. Here are six top tips to support you:

1. Get to know yourself
Take time to appreciate yourself and connect with your emotions. Being aware of your feelings allows you to express yourself clearly and effectively. Poor emotional regulation can negatively affect your mental wellbeing.

2. Put in the work
Healthy relationships are built, not found. They require commitment and a willingness to accommodate each other’s needs.

3. Set and respect boundaries
Boundaries communicate what you appreciate and what you don’t like in a relationship. For example, respecting your need for alone time helps prevent unrealistic expectations and reduces pressure on the relationship.

4. Talk and listen
Disagreements are normal. Focus on listening to understand, not just to respond. Be open about your emotions and vulnerabilities with people you trust.

5. Let go of control
You can only control your actions, not those of others. Accepting this reduces stress and saves time while fostering healthier interactions.

6. Reflect and learn
Healthy expression of feelings helps you respond appropriately to others. Often, anger stems from hurt; recognizing this allows for better communication and relationship building. Reflect on the relationships that work well in your life, identify their positive qualities, and apply these lessons elsewhere.

Relationship

Discipline, culture: The 2026 parenting playbook for Ghana’s future leaders

Published

2 weeks ago

February 21, 2026

WeeklySpectator

As parents on a mission, raise children who are not just successful, but cultured, morally upright, and ready to lead. The secret? Blend biblical principles and traditional values with practical parenting strategies that work in today’s world.

Ghana’s culture is built on respect, community, and integrity, and when combined with Christian values like love and forgiveness, it is a powerful combo for parenting. Teaching children about traditions, biblical truths, or the importance of greeting elders is not just about preserving culture—it is about building character.

5 Practical steps to raise disciplined, cultured kids

1. Set clear expectations
Explain rules and values clearly. For example, “We respect elders because God says ‘Honour your father and mother’” (Ephesians 6:2). Also, “We respect elders because they have lived longer and know more.” Align household rules with cultural values like obedience and responsibility.

2. Lead by example
Children mimic what they see. Show respect to elders, speak kindly, and demonstrate honesty in daily life. Proverb: “If you show a child how to behave, they’ll behave.” Moreover, Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way they should go …” You can also introduce them to traditional games like “Oware” or “Ampe,” which teach strategic thinking.

3. Teach emotional intelligence
Help children label emotions (“You’re feeling angry”). Encourage resolving conflicts peacefully—like using “sorry” to mend relationships. Ghanaian proverb: “A smooth sea doesn’t make a skilled sailor.”

4. Assign responsibilities
Give age-appropriate chores (e.g., fetching water, helping with cooking). It builds accountability and pride in contributing. Link chores to cultural values like communal living (“We all help in the community”) and biblical stewardship.

5. Embed culture and faith in daily life
Cook traditional foods like Banku, Jollof rice, or Fufu, tell folktales, or celebrate local festivals with prayer and gratitude. Discuss values like ubuntu (I am because we are) to teach teamwork and empathy; alongside God’s love for unity (John 13:34-35). Make culture fun and relatable.

Some other awesome ways to make Ghanaian culture relatable for children include:

Sharing popular Ghanaian artists like Joe Mettle, Uncle Ato, or Obaapa Christie, and teaching traditional dances like Kpanlogo or Adowa.
Exploring Ghanaian crafts like kente weaving or bead-making through online workshops.
Talking about festivals like Homowo (celebrated by the Ga people) or Aboakyer (a deer-hunting festival) using cool videos and pictures online.

Why this matters for Ghana’s future leaders

Respect and integrity: Cultured children grow into leaders who respect others and uphold ethical standards.
Community mindset: Values like cooperation and serving others (Galatians 5:13) prepare them to contribute positively to society.
Resilience: Cultural roots give children a strong identity, helping them navigate life’s challenges.

Parenting in the digital age

Balance screen time with cultural activities. Use Anansi stories or Bible stories on YouTube or play Oware to teach strategy and patience.
Discuss social media etiquette through the lens of respect, responsibility, and biblical wisdom (Proverbs 15:4).

Final thought for Ghanaian parents
February 2026 is a fresh start. Blend Ghana’s timeless values with modern tools to raise leaders who are grounded, respectful, and ready to thrive.

To be continued …

Source: REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI and Counselor Blessing Offei’s insights on relationships, marriage, and parenting in Ghana. He is an author, mental health professional, lecturer, and marriage counsellor at COUNSELOR PRINCE & ASSOCIATES CONSULT (CPAC COUNSELLOR TRAINING INSTITUTE). He is the author of several books, including “Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage” and “A Counsellor’s Guide to Using ‘Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage’ Effectively.”