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Stop damaging your love life!

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Sometimes, unknowingly, we are doing things that don’t positively impact our lives. These habits have a way of subconsciously seeping into our daily life so we don’t even realise that the fault might be our own. We always have someone else to blame for our failures. Possibly, you are doing a lot of things right, but one of these might be reducing your chances of being in a healthy relationship. If you are doing even one of the following, you need to stop right now!

Cutting yourself off from social interactions

If you are looking to meet someone while you stay inside a shell, waiting to be discovered, then I’m sorry to tell you that the chances of that happening are scarce. Life is no Disney movie. You need to put yourself out there. If you keep turning down every invitation, don’t indulge in group activities, excuse yourself from conversations; you are reducing the chances of ever meeting the one with some potential. The game rules are; you need to play if you want to win.

Settling for a temporary relationship

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Many people choose to be with the wrong person over being alone. If you are settling for someone not suitable for you, killing time as you wait for the right one to come along, you need to burst this bubble. You will never meet your right match if you are stuck with the wrong one, and how do you even explore your options if you are not even a hundred per cent available, not without cheating on your present partner, of course. So be honest with yourself and your partner, and don’t settle for a mediocre relationship if that’s not what you were looking for.

 Coming off as desperate

Remember that creepy guy/girl from college who was always found around you, not giving up any opportunity to talk to you? Think back to what a big turn-off it was, and even if they were a nice person, you always ran in the opposite direction because of how desperate they were. So, unless you are trying to attract that freak from college, be available but don’t appear too desperate. Be subtle in your approach, don’t lose your poise, and appear overly eager.

Being around people who are cynical about love

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Do most of your friends have negative opinions about love and relationships and can’t stop going on and on about what a waste of time love is? If yes, you need to spend less time with them, else this negativity will affect you and your perspective towards love.  It’s okay if they try to cheer you up from your recent break-up, but if this is who they are, you don’t want that kind of disapproval for love in your life. You may have had a couple of unsuccessful relationships, but that should not make you bitter about ever finding love again. How will you find something you don’t even believe exists, and by all means, love does exist? You just need to give yourself a chance to be accepting of it.

Overindulging in comfort food/drinks etc

You will never see an emotionally healthy person constantly drowning in their sorrows in comfort food, drinks, maybe even alcohol, etc. It’s okay to do it occasionally, but if you are always seen with a big bag of chips or can’t function without a bit of hash, this is a big turn-off. Nobody wants to be with a person who has labelled himself or herself  as unhappy and emotionally unstable, and chances are if you keep up with this detrimental habit, very soon your physical health will start showing the signs too.

Having a negative mindset

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Many people who have been single for a long time or have had unsuccessful relationships develop a pessimistic mindset. In this kind, even though you are open to dating, you know it’s going to be of ‘no use.’ If you keep having a hopeless outlook towards finding the right partner, this will be visible in all your social interactions, and your overall energy will be below. You won’t put in enough effort in building up a conversation because you think it’s a waste etc. Your perspective will affect your actions and how much you invest in communicating with someone.

Source: www.dreamyhub.com

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…Tips on healthy eating for children during holidays

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 During the holidays, it is important for children to enjoy it and indulge in holiday treats while maintaining healthy eating habits and making balanced choices.

Setting children up for healthy eating during the holidays is an excellent way to begin building their holiday eating habits as they grow into adults.

Here are some tips to help parents and guardians ensure healthy eating habits for children during the holidays.

  1. Be a role model.

Parents and caregivers play an essential role in influencing children’s eating habits. Offer children the same balanced meal you cook for yourself and other adults. Avoid making negative comments about food or the meal and keep mealtimes.

Keep to a consistent schedule.

A routine schedule can help minimise grazing and boredom eating. Try to offer three balanced meals and set snack times. Do not offer an alternative to the meal you plan to make for the family. But if your child does not like what is provided, don’t force them to eat if they are uninterested. Let them know that if they are hungry later, they can eat what was offered.

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Involve your children in meal prep.

Focus on balanced meals that include vegetables, lean proteins and complex carbohydrates.

Make healthy swaps.

Consider making healthy swaps, such as using whole wheat flour, offering whole fruits, reducing the sugar in baked goods, and limiting added sugars, especially from sugar-sweetened beverages like hot chocolate and eggnog. Consider making your beverages at home to reduce and control the amount of added sugar.

Encourage active play.

Make the holidays a time to engage in family activities. Take family hikes, spend a day at the beach or the bay, or enjoy a stroll in the neighborhood or a local park. These activities can help improve appetite and relieve boredom.

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Till death do us part? The changing face of marriage, divorce in Ghana

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Marriage has long been celebrated as a lifelong union built on love, commitment and mutual support. Across Ghana, wedding ceremonies continue to bring families together with the hope that couples will remain together “till death do us part.” Yet, behind the colourful ceremonies and joyful celebrations, an increasing number of marriages are ending in separation and divorce, reflecting the changing realities of modern family life.

According to the 2021 Population and Housing Census, about 42.9 per cent of Ghanaians aged 12 years and above are married, while 4.8 per cent are divorced and 3.5 per cent are separated, indicating that marital dissolution affects thousands of families across the country.

These figures suggest that although marriage remains a cherished institution, divorce has become a growing social reality.

For Ama, a 38-year-old businesswoman in Accra, divorce was never part of her plans. “We loved each other deeply when we got married,” she recalled. “But after years of constant arguments, financial pressure and poor communication, we realised we were hurting each other more than helping each other.” After ten years of marriage and two children, Ama and her husband decided to divorce. Her experience mirrors that of many Ghanaian couples who begin their marriages with hope but later struggle to overcome life’s pressures.

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Marriage counsellor, Mr Patrick J. Tengey explained that poor communication remains one of the leading causes of marital breakdown. “When couples stop talking and listening to each other, unresolved disagreements gradually become resentment,” he said. He added that financial difficulties, unemployment, infidelity, domestic violence, substance abuse and unrealistic expectations continue to place enormous strain on marriages.

His observations are supported by research conducted by psychologists Joseph Osafo, Kwaku Oppong Asante, Charlotte Asantewaa Ampomah and Annabella Osei-Tutu of the University of Ghana. Their study, which analysed divorce cases from courts in the Greater Accra Region, identified infidelity, financial problems, abuse, lack of intimacy, third-party interference and conflicts over gender roles as the major factors contributing to divorce in Ghana.

Marriage counsellor, Grace Mensah, believes many broken marriages could have been saved if couples sought professional help earlier. “Communication, trust and conflict resolution are skills that must be learned,” she said. “Unfortunately, many couples only seek counselling after the relationship has already reached a crisis.” The emotional and financial consequences of divorce often extend beyond the couple themselves.

Mrs Ofosu, a resident at Bohye, explained that children frequently experience anxiety, emotional distress and academic difficulties following their parents’ separation. “Children deserve stability,” she said.

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“Even when divorce becomes necessary, parents must continue working together for their children’s welfare.”

Family lawyer, Evans Nii, noted that many divorce cases involve disputes over child custody, maintenance and property distribution.

He explained that under Ghana’s Matrimonial Causes Act, 1971 (Act 367), the court may grant a divorce only when it is satisfied that the marriage has broken down beyond reconciliation.

The law also considers issues such as adultery, unreasonable behaviour, desertion and prolonged separation when determining whether a marriage has irretrievably broken down.

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He further explained that Article 22 of the 1992 Constitution protects the property rights of spouses during and after marriage, while the Children’s Act, 1998 (Act 560) requires that the best interests of the child remain the court’s primary consideration in custody decisions.

Religious leaders continue to encourage forgiveness, patience and reconciliation where possible. However, many acknowledge that marriages characterised by persistent domestic violence or abuse require immediate intervention to protect victims.

 Experts believe strengthening marriages requires both personal commitment and institutional support.

Premarital counselling, relationship education, financial planning and accessible counselling services, they say, can help couples navigate the challenges of married life before problems become overwhelming.

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French-American journalist, Mignon McLaughlin, once observed that, “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” Philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche similarly argued that “It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” Their words continue to resonate with many relationship experts who believe lasting marriages depend on continuous effort rather than romantic feelings alone.

As Ghanaian society evolves, so too do expectations surrounding marriage. While divorce may sometimes provide safety and a fresh beginning for those trapped in abusive or unhealthy relationships, many experts believe stronger communication, mutual respect and timely counselling can help preserve marriages that might otherwise end in separation.

Ultimately, the promise of “till death do us part” remains a cherished ideal. Whether that promise becomes reality may depend not only on love, but also on patience, understanding, shared responsibility and the willingness of couples to grow together through life’s changing seasons.

By Sandra Obeng

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