Odd News
Short Jokes
“Sofishticated.”
- “I’m afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.”
- “My wife said I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.”
- “Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?” “In case they get a hole in one!”
- “Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera.”
- “What do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common?” “They’re both Paris sites.”
- “What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?” “Sofishticated.”
- “How do you follow Will Smith in the snow?” “You follow the fresh prints.”
- “If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?” “Pilgrims.”
- “I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. Turns out it was the refrigerator all along.”
- “How does dry skin affect you at work?” “You don’t have any elbow grease to put into it.”
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I AM in love with Adwoa, a 25-year-old banker. She has a 10-month old daughter and I am not perturbed about that. She said the father of the child broke up with her even before the child was born. I loved her even before I knew she had a child, and when she told me she had a baby, it didn’t change anything. Love was still love, and care still flowed between us.
I spent some nights with her, and the behaviour of her baby makes me feel like there’s another man she knows. She cries when I pick her up.
The same thing happens when she wakes up and sees me in bed with her mother. I’m not comfortable with the way that baby looks at me. It’s as though there’s someone else looking at me through her eyes. She doesn’t blink an eye. She looks at me as if I’m not the one she’s expecting to see. Is this normal?
Papa, Swedru.
Dear Papa,
IT’S understandable you’re feeling a bit uneasy about the baby’s behaviour. Given the situation, it’s likely the baby is just picking up on your energy or adjusting to a new face.
Ten-month-old can be particular about strangers. Try engaging with her more during calm moments, like playtime or when she is fed. Build a bond through activities she enjoys and have an open chat with your girlfriend about how you’re feeling; she might notice things you’ve missed. The intense staring could be curiosity; babies are like that sometimes. Take it easy, and don’t overthink it.
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A man who bed-wets went to see a psychiatrist…
Psychiatrist: Does a dream usually precede your bed-wetting?
Man: Yes.
Psychiatrist: Tell me how it happens.
Man: A little demon appears to me in my sleep and says, “Hey… Let us pee.” Then, I wake up to see the bed wet with my urine.
Psychiatrist: This is what you must do. If the demon comes tonight and tells you “let us pee”, just reply him that you have already peed.
The man left and returned the following day with tears streaming down his face.
Psychiatrist: Why are you weeping? Didn’t my therapy work?
Man: You have worsened my case!
Psychiatrist: What? How?
Man: When the demon came, I told him I’d already peed. Then he said, “OK, let us sh*t.”
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