Obaa Yaa
She has set spies on me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a Christian brother of one of the churches in Accra. I am 28 and she is 22 and an apprentice in a salon.
Both of us attend the same church and we have finally decided to tie the knot.
She is been catered for by her two brothers who considers her to be too young for marriage.
Both brothers asked me to stay away from their sister because she is still young and has a long way to go.
I confronted her about the actions of his brothers. Her response was that we should end the relationship.
She told me point blank to find another woman and marry because her two brothers were against the marriage.
Ironically, she has set spies on me, telling my friends she will cause trouble if I don’t marry her.
Barima
Kofrom,
Dear Barima,
Are you prepared mentally, emotionally and financially to get married this year or you are getting married because of pressure from family?
Your former girlfriend is obviously hurt and still loves you that is why she has set spies on you.
But I must say her approach was wrong and immature.
I suggest you approach one of the marriage counsellors in your church and ask them to advise you and resolve the uneasiness between you and your former girlfriend.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I PROPOSED to a lady I have always admired during our university days. Interestingly, this woman was so much into me as well.
The only thing she always asks from a man is a gold chain, a new dress and sandals close to GH₵2,000.
According to her, if the man is able to get her all these items listed, then it is a win and yes for the man.
She demands these things because of the way a man treated her. Her argument is that if I should decide to end this relationship, she would have had something from me at least.
Obaa Yaa, is it worth venturing into?
Kelvin, Ofankor.
Dear Kelvin,
ANY love affair that is based on money or exchange of money for love or sex is an affair that begins on a wrong premise.
Such an affair is conditional and would encounter challenges sooner or later, because it is not grounded on mutual love and affection.
Besides, you are a student, how are you going to afford the gold chain? It looks as if this whole relationship would stress you. I will advise you to stay away from the lady.
Though you didn’t state your age in the letter, I plead with you to give yourself some time and relax. The beautiful one’s are not yet born.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
MY wife is a trader. She travels frequently to a neighbouring country almost every two weeks for two days.
While she was away, her step-sister comes over to do some cooking for me.
I have noticed that her step-sister has been making advances at me.
Recently, she entered the bathroom while I was in there, and realised I was bathing. She stood looking at me until I threw some water at her.
I intend to tell my wife about her sister’s behaviour, but friends say this may cause tension between the sisters. I need your view.
Ben, Togo.
Dear Ben,
IT is true that such revelation to your wife will cause some tension between the two sisters.
You can also sit your sister-in-law down and give her a stern warning. Let her understand that you intend to report her to her sister if she makes that mistake again.
Then you will have to see how you can arrange with your wife for her to cook enough food to store while she is away for those two days. If necessary, you may have to buy a fridge or freezer for that purpose. In that case, there would be no need for your sister-in-law to come and stay over. You will also have to take good care of the children if there are any.
A marriage only works when those involved are prepared to make sacrifices.
However, if after this arrangement this woman should persist with her advances, then bring the matter out into the open and let your wife and her family know about it.
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