Connect with us

Obaa Yaa

Poverty is preventing me from marrying

Published

on

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I was in two serious relationships, we loved each other and had wanted to marry but this could not go on as we had planned.

Though l was disturbed when l broke up with the lady in my first relationship, l felt very bad when the second one  also ended abruptly.

But l must be quick to point out that my inability to support the two ladies caused the break up in the two relationships.

Advertisement

I made the necessary efforts to get a job in order to improve on my economic fortunes but things could not work out well.

Unfortunately, other men who were ready to marry succeeded in snatching the ladies from me. The situation has left me under pressure and has given me a lot to think about.

The second lady said she loved  me but my inability to secure a job caused her to accept the proposal from the other man. She confided in me that she still loved me despite all that had happened between us.

According to her she had to accept the proposal from the husband because of too much pressure mounted on her by her parents.

Advertisement

Given the opportunity to make her decision, she would accept to marry me but was afraid of what her parents would say.

What should l do?

Tawiah, Accra

Dear Tawiah,

Advertisement

I find your letter quite disturbing because of the series of disappointments you have had so far.

It is good to be forthright in this matter and you must be commended for identifying the cause of  ypour problem.

Though you are making frantic efforts to secure a job in order to stop the recurrent problem of unsuccessful marriages, it is believed that you have the prerequisite qualification and luck will surely shine on you one day.

Having accepted to marry that man should be enough to sever relations with your former girlfriend who can easily find trouble for you.

Advertisement
Continue Reading
Advertisement

Obaa Yaa

My Stepfather at ‘war’ with me over my late mother’s house

Published

on

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am a 39-year-old woman and the eldest of four children. My mother died five years ago. Before her death, she owned a house where she lived with my stepfather and my younger siblings. My stepfather had been married to my mother for more than 20 years.

After the death of mother. My stepfather has gone to court, claiming that the house belongs to him. He says he contributed money towards the construction and maintenance of the property and that my mother’s children have no right to interfere with it.

He has even accused me and my siblings of trying to take the house from him.

Advertisement

I am shocked because my mother was the person who acquired the land and started the building. She also told us several times that the house was meant to remain in the family.

There is no written agreement between my mother and my stepfather about who owns what, and I am worried that this case could divide the family permanently.

My younger siblings are also angry with me because they believe I should fight my stepfather until the house is given to us.

Obaa Yaa, should I fight him in court or try to settle the matter outside court?

Advertisement

From Frimpongmaa,

Assin Praso.

Dear Frimpongmaa, 

I am sorry you are going through this. A dispute over your late mother’s home can be very painful, especially when it involves your stepfather. Do not give up on the house or sign any document simply because he has sued you. Being sued does not mean that he automatically owns the property.

Advertisement

Find out exactly what your stepfather is claiming, for example, whether he says the house belongs to him, that he is the beneficiary, or that you have no right to the property.

The court will determine who legally owns the property based on the applicable succession law and the evidence.

The exact answer can change considerably depending on where the house is located, whether your mother left a Will, how she acquired the house, what type of marriage she had with your stepfather, whether there are other children, and the applicable customary/statutory law.

Advertisement
Continue Reading

Obaa Yaa

I can’t meet demands from my husband’s family

Published

on

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am a woman married for over 17 years and blessed with three children.

My father passed away two years ago and left some property to me and my two siblings.

Among the things I inherited was a piece of land and a house which I intend to keep for my children’s future.

Advertisement

My husband’s family are putting pressure on me to give up the property and allow my husband to take control of it. They are saying that because I am married, anything I inherit should benefit my husband and his family as well.

I have tried to explain that my father deliberately left the property to me, but they accuse me of being selfish and disrespectful to my husband’s family.

I am now confused. I love my husband, but I don’t want to lose what my father worked hard to leave behind.

What should I do?

Advertisement

Adzo, Ho

Dear Adzo

If the inheritance legally belongs to you, you should not feel pressured to surrender it simply to be at peace with your husband’s family.

Advertisement

 At the same time, avoid making a rush decision based on anger or fear.

I don’t see the reason why your husband’s family wants to take control of the land.

Keep copies of relevant documents and, if necessary, seek legal advice.

Do not sign any document transferring, renouncing your interest until you fully understand its consequences.

Advertisement

You should also have a good conversation with your husband. Ask him why his family wants you to hand over your inheritance to them and whether he supports their position.

Remember that family pressure is not the same as a legal obligation. You can respect your husband’s relatives without surrendering something that is rightfully yours.

If you eventually decide to share part of the inheritance, let it be because you genuinely wanted to, not because you were intimidated or emotionally overstretched.

SKIP THE QUEUE, TAP THE NEWS

Advertisement

You can now read the Ghanaian Times and The Spectator newspapers from the comfort of your device via TimesNewsPlus.

Join our WhatsApp Channel: https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VbBElzjInlqHhl1aTU27

Continue Reading
Advertisement

Trending