Obaa Yaa
My husband disowns pregnancy
We have been married for seven years and blessed with three children. Two years ago, my husband relocated to Kumasi on postings and he occasionally comes back to the family to spend weekends.
When l informed him that l was pregnant, he asked me of the last time l had my period. After this information, he did not show any sign of annoyance and everything went on smoothly until he left for Kumasi.
Four months into my pregnancy, my husband has become angry under the pretext that since he was in Kumasi per his calculations and not physically present with me, he could not have been responsible for the pregnancy.
He said my pregnancy has confirmed reports he had received from some sources of my association with a certain man in our locality.
He asked that l should pack my belongings from the house for good and leave the children with him.
Despite my explanation that l cannot indulge in extra-marital affairs, he does not want to believe what l tell him.
Can l inform my parents about the current development and the next step to take in order to salvage my reputation?
Ama, Tema.
Dear Ama,
It is unfortunate things have changed in your marriage and a serious allegation is being levelled against you at the time you are pregnant.
From the tone of your letter, your husband has kept the information he had received about you without verifying the truth from you, the wife.
This is a case of mistrust which has emerged and could have been resolved easily by employing the tools of patience, tolerance and being frank in your deliberations.
You have every right to inform your parents who can take this matter up with your husband at their level.
The surest option is to go for a DNA test at the hospital to ascertain the paternity of the child after you have been delivered of the child.
Dear ObaaYaa,
I am 22 and she is 20. We have not grown to a marrying state. My problem is that anytime I see this lady, I feel nervous and try to use a different route.
Both of us are Christians and belong to one church. I have been together with many girls, but this strange thing has not happened to me before.
Meanwhile, I am a student, and it will take some time for me to complete my education and get a job before marriage, so I can take care of my children.
Should I be bold one day to tell her to wait for me till I complete my education and then get a job, or should I stop her from coming to visit me?
—PK, Suhum
Dear PK,
Sometimes, when people are in love, they get excited and nervous when their loved one approaches them. However, this feeling should not be permanent. This nervousness normally gives way to relaxation, comfort, and joy.
If this nervousness should persist, then it means there is a problem. If there is something about her character that makes you uncomfortable, then talk to her about it. If it’s something negative and she has the power to change, let her do so.
At the age of 20, I also think both of you are very young for marriage. Just take the relationship easy—no serious commitments and no sex.
Give priority to a good education and a good job. That is one of the pillars to a happy marriage.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a regular reader of your column. I admire the extent to which you go to help get solutions to some of the problems readers present to you.
I have an interesting concern which I hope you can help address just as you do with relationship matters. This has to do with taxi drivers.
Obaa Yaa, all I want to know and understand is why taxi drivers always want to count their money during rides. I don’t know whether that is to show off to passengers what they have or not.
I believe they can sit comfortably in their cars and count their proceeds without any inconvenience or interference when they end their rides or reload their car. Interestingly, they sometimes do so about two or more times before reaching their respective destinations.
What makes it more fascinating is that I have asked over five taxi drivers why they always want to count their monies when driving. The answers I got amused me. After the laughter, they told me they came to meet the practice.
Obaa Yaa, can you please use your platform to get some answers for me or other passengers that may also have wondered about this practice?
—Sammy Tee, La Wireless
Dear Sammy Tee,
We appreciate your kind effort of reading and enjoying our stories. It’s quite funny and interesting to hear about this fascinating story involving some taxi drivers.
This practice has been ongoing since time immemorial, and I don’t believe it will change anytime soon. I have personally encountered such drama when I gave a taxi driver a huge amount for my change. He quickly brought out his sales and started shouting at me that he didn’t have smaller denominations.
In my opinion, taxi drivers count their monies to keep track of earnings and to give accurate change. Also, some taxi drivers usually deal with different denominations. Counting helps to separate notes and coins for easier transactions with the next group of passengers.
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