Odd News
Let us pee
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A man who bed-wets went to see a psychiatrist…
Psychiatrist: Does a dream usually precede your bed-wetting?
Man: Yes.
Psychiatrist: Tell me how it happens.
Man: A little demon appears to me in my sleep and says, “Hey… Let us pee.” Then, I wake up to see the bed wet with my urine.
Psychiatrist: This is what you must do. If the demon comes tonight and tells you “let us pee”, just reply him that you have already peed.
The man left and returned the following day with tears streaming down his face.
Psychiatrist: Why are you weeping? Didn’t my therapy work?
Man: You have worsened my case!
Psychiatrist: What? How?
Man: When the demon came, I told him I’d already peed. Then he said, “OK, let us sh*t.”
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I said to my wife “1-0”.
She farted and said “1 all”.
I farted and said “2-1”.
She farted and said “2 all”.
I then had a wet fart which soiled the bed.
My wife said, “What was that?”
I said “Half time. Switch sides”.
A drunk man comes home late. His wife sees him and angrily exclaims, “Are you drunk again?!”
The man shakes his head and answers, “No, I am not drunk!”
“Okay, then prove it. There’s a clock over there. Can you tell the time?”
“Of course I can!” says the man.
He turns toward the clock and screams, “Hey! I am not drunk!”
