Features
Health, worry and the human stomach
SIKAMAN is gradually becoming a health-conscious nation because piles is now a national disease. Some natives claim that piles, alias kooko, has gone on strike and has attacked different parts of their bodies — buttocks, forehead, inner ear, inner nose, lips, and hair. Now they do not know where next it would attack, and soon a petition would be sent to Parliament to declare piles a national tragedy.
It is interesting when you consider the way people assume that even common malaria is caused by kooko. Well, the medical authorities have come out to say that piles is a disease of only the last end of the alimentary canal. It has a name. Go and check the name in your biology textbook, or ask the nearest herbalist.
The health consciousness of the average Sikaman native is not limited to kooko, though. People are becoming very much aware of their pot-bellies. They can’t be carrying it all their lives, taking into consideration that half the time, it is laden with gallons of beer.
Even Kwame Alomele is gradually trying to unload the burden that precedes him. “I no longer have the stamina to carry a pot. I am now health-inclined and want to be a slim-macho, doing a sport. I am applying to be a member of a golf club and hope to do wonders with the tiny ball. Fact is I want to be up-and-doing like Gordon Avernogbor, the Grandmaster of GBC fame.”
The media have helped to carry this health idea far. Ghana Television does weekly health programmes, and the FM stations have various programmes and tit-bits on health. Radio Gold is on a Diabetes Month health beat, and patients are made to acquire some knowledge about what they may be suffering from and how they can manage their conditions.
In the print media, the Weekly Spectator has singlehandedly launched a powerful health crusade, and the sky is the limit. In fact, the Spectator has been hailed in medical circles as one of the papers that have zealously carried the health mantle aloft in recent times. The Mirror also runs a health column with my good friend Dr. Anyah in the chair.
Tune in to any of the FM stations and you’re likely to hear a health tit-bit that can be useful to you. You’ll hear something like, “if you eat too much yorke gari, you’ll develop coccidiosis, which is a fowl disease. So check the level of gari and beware of zorzor.”
COCKROACH DIET
Well, healthy living in general has to do with healthy eating. At least, that is what the nutritionists say. And the cockroach has been the most qualified nutritionist in the world. The reason is that the common cockroach is so health-conscious that it eats only a balanced diet — anything from rotten fruit to human excreta. It doesn’t reject food.
The experts say fruits and vegetables, which are alkaline in nature, are good for the human body. There is some truth in this. The silver-back bear, perhaps the most powerful animal in the world, is a vegetarian. It can uproot a tree almost effortlessly, and the power in its arms is attributed to its vegetarian diet.
Anyhow, man cannot continue eating fruits and vegetables perpetually as the main diet. The stomach would get bored, the tongue will revolt, and the human body will subconsciously start crying for banku and okro soup plus giant crabs.
Ideally, a balanced diet — carbohydrates, protein, fats and oils, vitamins and minerals — in their correct quantities are enough to ensure healthy living. It means that you can’t fare well when you eat bread in the morning, bread in the afternoon, and kenkey and shito for supper. There would be a traffic jam in your intestines. And believe me, the traffic lights will also go off.
The killer menu is maintained for three days, and you’ll have what is termed as “treasonable constipation,” a sin against your body. No purgative can save you unless rice and okro soup. That combination is the best purgative in town. In 1983, it used to be one of the famous diets in Legon when famine besieged Sikaman. Students had to abandon lectures and stay close to the WC. Anything can happen. You can’t trust your own stomach.
Exercise also begets health, and brisk walking is the golden rule. I have a friend who is a positive thinker, and he told me walking is no problem to him. He once walked from Osu Christianborg to Circle to Abeka and back to Christiansburg.
No ice-water. No one gave him an award, but I congratulated him. Not that the guy is broke and can’t fix himself up in a trotro or taxi. Walking is his hobby. And his health is always excellent, his appetite ever-ready — no need for bitters. As for his sex life, your guess is as good as mine. He can deliver more than AK-47.
Exercise is good, but it must not wear you down. Do not over-exert. What about sex? Research has shown that excessive indulgence in sex is harmful to the central nervous system because it drains the body of its vitality.
Sex is basically for reproduction, but Ghanaman thinks quite differently. Some experts say twice a week or less is just what the body can cope with. Others say abstain and live long.
But what is the body’s most formidable adversary? It is WORRY. Worry has killed many more people than the Second World War did. About 90% of the population are chronic worriers. People are so addicted to worrying that even when there is nothing to worry about, they worry that there is nothing to worry about.
Worry causes hypertension and its attendant complications of heart disease, stroke, renal failure, and mental illness. The question is, how can man stop worrying? There is a formula by which you can stop worrying.
Make a date with Sikaman Palava in the coming weeks and get your formula for longevity, your life without worry.
This article was first published on Saturday, August 16, 1997.
THE state of feeling rejected, could be a terrifying experience especially for those who have become used to fame. If not properly addressed, it could lead to depression and the consequences, could be disastrous.
When you are on top of your game in whatever profession you find yourself such that you become famous, a lot of people try to associate with you. The phone never ceases to ring and one is tempted to feel loved and very important.
When a disaster strikes and the fame or the money which was the source of the attraction fades away, the circle of friends and fans begin to shrink and the phone will start to stop ringing until the call stops voting completely.
You will be shocked at how people you considered friends, will no longer be calling you or pay casual visits as they used to. You will begin to notice that messages you leave after calling them and not getting a response are not replied to and that is when you begin to know who your true friends are.
One of the most popular movie stars was an actress called Sharon Stone. In an interview with one of the media houses that was published, she spoke about how people who should have come around to encourage her in her moment of depression, shunned her. The calls stopped coming.
This is what the Bible admonishes that the arm of flesh will fail you and therefore we should put our trust in God. It could be a very frightening experience and can easily lead to depression.
Human nature being what it is, people will want to get close if things are okay. Everybody wants to associate themselves with interesting things, famous people, rich people etc for mainly selfish reasons.
We need to develop the habit of putting our trust in God and relying less on human beings. The lesson we have to take along in life is that, no one marries his or her enemy so how come people who took vows that they will love each other become so hostile to each other that they want to go their separate ways in life? Such is the reality of life.
It is therefore prudent for people to recognise that, life is full of uncertainties and so there is the need to prepare your mind for uncertainties so that when they occur, they do not disorganise your mental sanity.
A lot of people have experienced situations where people who they could have sworn will never betray their trust have disappointed them when they were through challenging moments.
If there is one thing famous people should desire, it should be the ability to identify who are true friends are. Countless stories abound regarding incidence of celebrities who have lost their shine and their wives divorcing them soon after.
It is sometimes useful as a famous or rich person to sign a prenuptial agreement before marriage to safeguard or protect yourself from any future unpleasant surprises.
People can be very pretentious these days, it goes both ways. There is this real life story where a man married a divorced wealthy woman and convinced her to sell her house so they could build a new one together, with the excuse that people are gossiping that he is being housed by a woman.
The woman agreed and they put up a new building. After a few years the man asked for a divorce, only for the woman to realise that the land on which the building was situated, was bought in the man’s name.
This can drive a person insane, if you are not mentally tough and this happens to you. When people hear that you are homeless, a lot of your so-called friends will stop calling, so that you do not become a burden on them.
By Laud Kissi-Mensah
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‘But, er …. I don’t even know your name’.
‘Paul. Paul Allotey. I’m Sarah, by the way. Paul, why don’t you leave me here, since this is the last important thing I’m doing today’.
‘Okay. Now Sarah. I was just thinking. You will be here at the cafe for about an hour. By then it will be about twelve thirty. Then, you would be thinking of buying yourself some lunch, to eat here or to take home. So if you would please allow me, I will take you to one of the nicest eating places in town, and after you have sorted that one out, then I can drop you home. Just that one errand, then I won’t bother you again’.
‘You are not bothering me at all. You are being very kind to me. And I just realised you are a mind reader too. The last item on my agenda was lunch’.
‘I’m so glad I appeared at your doorstep, just in time’.
‘Okay. Now Paul, since you say the cafe is a comfortable place, let’s go in together, and you can do your work while I get my application done’.
‘Okay, Sarah. Thanks. Let’s go’.
We got back in the car at eleven forty-five.
‘So where are we going, Paul?’
‘To Royalty restaurant. It’s a twenty minute drive away’.
‘So, do you enjoy your job?’
‘Most certainly. I won’t change it, not even to be President. And am I right to say that you are preparing to enter the university?’
‘That’s my plan. I hope it works’.
‘It will, if you are determined, and disciplined. You look very much like a disciplined person’.
‘Thank you very much’.
We arrived at Royalty in twenty-five minutes, ‘You are joining me for lunch, Paul’.
‘Thanks for the honour, Sarah. But the bill is on me’.
‘Aren’t you taking on too much for one day?’
‘I never do anything that is bigger than me, Sarah’.
Over the next hour and a half, we discussed fashion, local and international politics, and sports, as we ate and relaxed. Finally, he drove me to the shop.
‘I will never forget you, Paul’.
‘I’m glad to have been helpful. But if you don’t mind, I’ll say it again, your husband is extremely lucky. You are really beautiful’.
‘Thanks again. But do you mind if I call you sometime in the future?’
‘Certainly not. Let me write it here. I will not ask for your number, for obvious reasons. But I will be looking forward to hearing from you. And hopefully, I will see you next month, when I call to drop your bill’.
‘Okay Paul. See you then’. What a lovely day, I said to myself as I opened the front door. I closed the shop and got home by seven. I went straight to the bedroom, stood in the mirror and took a good look at myself. ‘You are a very beautiful woman, Sarah. Never forget that’. I will not forget that, again.
Over the next several weeks, Martin and I had very little to do with each other. In the morning he ate his breakfast and after a shabby ‘I’m going’, he left. He came home around eight at the earliest, ate his dinner and, already soaked in beer, went off to sleep.
He spent the greater part of the weekends at the club house with his friends, playing tennis and partying. My mind was focused on furthering my education, so I didn’t complain to him, and didn’t bother to inform my parents about what was happening. I had decided that I would only take action if he lifted his hand against me again. I spent my free time reading all manner of interesting stuff on the internet, and chatting with my sister on WhatsApp.
One evening, he came home at about eight, rushed to the bedroom and rushed out. An envelope, obviously containing money, dropped out of his pocket, and I picked it up and followed him. I was going to call him and give it to him, but I noticed that there was a young woman in the car, so I went back in, counted it and put it in a drawer in the hall. He came back after some ten minutes.
‘Excuse me, I dropped an envelope containing money. You must have seen it’.
‘Yes, I saw it. Actually, I followed you, and was about to call you and hand it over to you when I realised that there was a woman in the car, so I came back in. I counted it. One thousand cedis.
‘Well let me have it. I have to be going’.
‘I will let you have it if you will tell me who the woman in the car is, and why you are going to give her that amount of money’.
‘Listen, if you waste my time, I will teach you a lesson you will never forget. Give me the money now!’
‘Here’s what we will do, Martin. I know you will give money to her anyway, so I will give it to you, if you will withdraw the threat you just issued. But I want you to know that I will be taking some steps from tomorrow. Things are getting out of hand’.
‘Okay, I’m sorry I threatened you. Can you please give me the money’. I handed it over to him, and he ran out’.
The following morning, I waited for him to finish having breakfast, and told him I wanted to have a word with him urgently.
‘You better be quick. You know I’m going to work’.
‘Well, I want to inform you that I will inform my parents, and your parents, about the situation in this house. As I said yesterday, things are getting out of hand. You spend most of your time drinking. You get drunk every evening, and through the weekend. And you are also spending your time and money on a prostitute’.
‘How dare you? One more stupid word from you …’
‘Am I lying, Martin? You have just started life, yet you are behaving like a rich, elderly man who has already seen his children through university, and can afford a life of fun. As I said, I’m going to inform our parents. Maybe your parents can straighten you out before it is too late’.
‘Look, we can talk this evening. It’s nothing like what you are saying’. He walked away, shocked.
That evening, I was expecting to have a meaningful discussion with him, but his mother called early in the evening to offer me some ‘advice’. Her son had called to say that certain developments at home were disturbing him so much that they were beginning to affect his work.
And, ‘as a loving mother to her daughter’, she was advising me to submit to my husband, and support him in prayer, and not ‘drive him from home’. Men would always be men, and she was telling me ‘from experience’ that no matter how much time Martin stayed away from home, he would always come home to me.
She had been a young wife before, so she understood the challenges I was facing. So I could be assured that if I followed her advice, all would be well. And, of course, she didn’t allow me to tell my side of the story.
Martin came home very late, and very drunk. And from the next morning, he carried on as before. With some hesitation, I called my dad and told him all that had gone on.
‘Well, my daughter. I’m not going to say “I told you so”. I was only trying to protect you. So here’s what we’ll do. Continue doing the best you can, and try not to give him any excuse to harm you, but if things continue to deteriorate, I will take you back.
A couple of days later, my cousin Dinah arrived in Accra from Brussels, having completed her medical course. With Martin’s agreement, I went to Koforidua and spent a couple of days. I spent most of the time chatting about her experiences in the US, but we also discussed my relationship with Martin, and she endorsed Dad’s decision to take action if Martin’s behaviour did not change after two weeks Elaine informed Mom and Dad. We endorsed Dad’s decision to take action if there was no change in two weeks.
Dinah returned with me to Takoradi. Her plan was to spend a couple of weeks, and return to Accra to be posted. I called Paul Allotey, and asked if he would meet her for lunch and, if possible, show her some interesting spots. Delighted, he suggested that we meet at Royalty the next day.
I told Martin about it, to remove any possibility of future disagreement over ‘going out with men’.
‘It’s fine with me’, he said, ‘if, of all the people who could show your sister round this town, you chose a borla man. Doesn’t that indicate the kind of person you are?’
‘ First of all, Martin’, I’ve spoken to him a few times, and he comes across as a decent guy, so I think it is rather unfortunate that you are writing him off when you don’t know him’.
By Ekow de Heer
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