Obaa Yaa
He is back for his child after 8 years
Our marriage was blessed with a lovely boy who has become the delight of many in the family.
Eight years into the marriage, my husband travelled to the USA. While there initially, he was communicating with us frequently but stopped at a point and all attempts to reach him were unsuccessful.
After five years, he called to inform me that he was married, therefore, l should accept proposal from any man who will express interest to marry me.
Eight years after, he has returned to Ghana to take my child away, who is my companion and my only source of joy.
This man does not respect me and my family. I will resist any attempt by him to carry out this paln.
What should l do?
Akua, Accra.
Dear Akua,
The close union which has developed between you and your child has reached a stage that separation will be difficult for you under the circumstance. This is where the problem lies.
Secondly, things would have been better if you had re-married and preoccupied with serving the interest of your new husband.
Though you are no longer together, the two of you can reach a workable settlement to your mutual benefit.
You should work towards shaping the holistic development of this child for a better tomorrow.
Try to involve your elders if it is becoming difficult to help find a workable resolution to the problem.
Greetings
Mr George Kudiabor. Our hearts are glad on the occasion of your birthday. Though belated, we still wish to indicate that we love you and cherish you for playing an invaluable part in the family. May God bless, protect and guide you towards the right path in life. Hold onto your maker and enjoy the beauty of life.
From: Your lovely wife, children and members of The Third Generation.
Madam Lydia Som Yeboah. March 6,was your birthday and we would like to celebrate you for the efforts made to train the youth to enable them to assume responsible positions in the society. We very much appreciate this and pray for God’s protection and guidance for you.
From: Alfred Nii Arday Ankrah
Mr Edward Ansong. March 8, was your birthday and we wish you the best in your endeavours. May you be a blessing to your generation and grow in the grace, peace and love of God. Belated happy birthday.From: New Royal International School Old Students
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Due to a small misunderstanding, my wife has left her matrimonial home and had gone to stay with my in-laws. I have been invited by them to come for the matter to be settled.
However, I have been reliably informed that my wife and my three-year-old son are currently staying with a man.
This is so annoying, I want to call in the police to arrest and charge this man for abduction.
Philip,
Accra.
Dear Philip,
You don’t have a problem with this man. You have a problem with your wife.
Also, do not rely on hearsay to act. I suggest you go to your In-laws to ask of your wife and listen to what they have to say.
Go along with a mature member of your family and discuss the issue.
If it is just a ‘small misunderstanding’ as you say then let your attitude lead to reconciliation.
If it is true that your wife is living with a man and her parents endorse it then that is another matter.
Your family must meet her family squarely on the matter to decide whether your marriage to their daughter is over or not.
But don’t go for a divorce no matter how complicated things may turn out to be. You owe your child his happiness. The police is a last resort.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a girl of 25 years. My fiancé is 30 years. We met about three years ago when my fiancé was in training college. The plan was to get married after his schooling so we started making initial preparations towards that.
Now, my fiancé has started working in readiness to carry on with the engagement but his father says he should hold on because he started work not long ago.
His father doesn’t object to our relationship but he insists that my fiancé should further his education at the University before the engagement.
He warned, however, that if we insist on carrying out with the engagement, then he should be counted out. He would have nothing to do with his son again.
My fiancé also thinks marriage without the consent of the father can be disastrous because the Bible even talks about honouring one’s parents.
Obaa Yaa, my problem is that I cannot wait any longer. I feel like walking out of the relationship because my fiancé is being dictated to by the father. Please what should I do.
Ekua,
Obom.
Dear Ekua,
Probably your fiancé’s father is concerned about a better future for the two of you since marriage can be financially demanding.
What you are calling ‘engagement’ is customary marriage.
I believe you need to accept your boyfriend’s father’s advice and also use the opportunity to either further your education or be financially stable.
It is good to be married but it is better both partners are financially stable so that both of you will not be financially or emotionally drained in the marriage.
Real security is when you and your partner have no ulterior motive for marrying each other but for the sake of mutual love and respect which is based on the fear of God.
