Obaa Yaa
I am planning to end the marriage
Dear ObaaYaa,
We had a traditional marriage and sealed it with a memorable wedding. The congregation that attended the wedding was suggestive that the ceremony was grand.
God has graciously blessed me with the fruit of the womb with two beautiful daughters in succession.
I lost my job when l was delivered of my second child and things started to change from bad to worse.
At that time, my husband was very caring and constantly responded to the needs of the family, but one year down the lane, things changed when my husband fell in love with another lady at his place of work.
l could not complain because l had no grounds on which to stand.I, therefore, kept quiet until a friend of mine gave me a vivid account of what had gone on for some period.
Though he had denied having an extra marital affairs with her, as most men would do, l later caught him in the comfortable arms of his lover in the woman’s home.
Having discovered this, he packed out of the house and his attitude towards me and the children suddenly changed. He has refused to give me money for the upkeep of the children and has failed to find out about their welfare.
The lady is nine months pregnant and l understand he is happy about this development.
The situation is unbearable and l am contemplating leaving the marriage. Can l carry out my plans?
Francisca, Accra.
Dear Francisca,
It is appropriate to pour out your frustrations and problems which are disturbing your mind at this crucial moment. The austere economic conditions are not favourable and people are taking alternative steps to survive.
Since times are hard and families find it difficult to make ends meet, l would like to suggest that you kindly rescind your decision for now and stay in your marital home for the sake of the children.
Some men who had indulged in extra marital activities, had to eat the humble pie after serious regrets and re-united with their wives.
Your husband could possibly identify his mistake and return to you. When you leave your matrimonial home, he will presume that you are married to another man and would fail to be responsible for the upkeep of the children.
It is ideal that the two of you raise the children together.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 20 and she is 19. We have been lovers for the past four months and have promised to get married to each other.
We love each other badly that one cannot leave the other for long. Our relatives know about our affair except her grandmother who will be in the country soon.
My problem is that, I doubt if the grandmother will be excited about this relationship. Her grandmother is very strict and I doubt if this relationship can be successful.
Her grandmother has been like a mother and everything to her, so her final decision may count.
We have promised each other to stay holy and clean.
Lartey,
Sunyani
Dear Lartey,
I don’t think your fears are justified if the girl’s parent do not object to your relationship with her.
What makes you think her grandmother will oppose the relationship if her parents endorse it?
Be positive about the relationship. There is no cause for alarm.
I am very happy you guys are staying holy and clean until marriage.
Both of you are student and need to be careful about any decision you take.
I believe you should try as much as possible to support each other and stay away from any negative act.
I have a girlfriend who is ‘allergic’ to me and ‘allergic’ to men in general.
Because of this, I barely touch her. I do not sit too close to her. I do not even hold her hands for long.
We have tried before. Even recently, we tried again. At first, things looked normal.
Then suddenly she lifted her hands and started scratching her back aggressively. We stopped immediately. Moments later, she ran to the bathroom and started vomiting.
She spent almost four hours there, weak, nauseous, and drained.
Watching someone you love suffer while you cannot do anything about it is painful. Is it a curse or an allergy?
Hello Christian,
What you’re describing sounds frightening and emotionally exhausting for both of you. But it is important not to jump to the idea of a curse.
Severe reactions after touch, closeness, stress, or intimacy can sometimes be linked to medical conditions, allergies, anxiety responses, trauma, or psychosomatic reactions.
The safest and most loving step is encouraging her to see qualified doctors, especially an allergist and mental health professional, so the cause can be properly understood.
Your patience already shows deep care. Do not blame yourself or search for supernatural explanations first.
Focus on support, medical guidance, emotional safety, and honest communication while protecting both her health and your relationship.
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