The banker deceived me

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I fell in love with a banker who told me he wasn’t married and therefore, wanted to marry me.

We started going out and spending time together. He went to the extent of going to see my parents for the engagement list.

It was only after I got pregnant when he confessed he was already married and could not afford to marry me as a second wife.

The problem is that for the past five years, this man has refused to provide for the upkeep of the child.

He is not showing any commitments towards the child and making things difficult for me.

I am currently finding it difficult to take care of the child’s feeding and clothing.

My child is very brilliant at school and my fear is that I cannot give him the best of education since I am not working.

Prisca, Dodowa.

Dear Prisca,

Your story is a sad and unfortunate one. He just ‘toyed’ with you and was successful.

It’s about time women check about the men who propose to them.

And in the first place, why were you intimate with him, knowing very well that you were not married?

Report the matter to the Domestic Violence and Victims Support Unit (DOVVSU) of the Ghana Police Service, formerly known as Women and Juvenile Unit (WAJU) immediately.

They would summon him and question him about the upkeep of his child and employ legal means to make him accept responsibility for the child.

Mummy has disowned me

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am a 25 year old man who completed Kwame Nkrumah University of Science and Technology (KNUST) last year.

I had a confrontation with my mother after stealing her money to travel abroad; but this failed.

As a result, she has disowned me. My brother and I have sought the assistance of elders in our family and pastors to reconcile us but she has rejected all these.

She doesn’t talk to me nor cook for me. We leave like strangers in our home and I am uncomfortable.

I have pleaded with her countless times, but she doesn’t give ear to my plea.

I am burdened with this problem and I can’t cope anymore. I am sad and miserable. What should I do?

Ofori, Brekum.

Dear Ofori,

I guess you are just paying the wages of your sins. Come to terms with the fact that you have brought all of this upon yourself. Since you are so miserable, begin to work on yourself and turn away from your deeds.

You have already taken the first step by recognising your fault.

Now, begin to seek counselling from your church pastor and family elders.

When your mother sees and hears that you are now a changed person, I believe she will accept you back.

Obaa Yaa

I saw her with four boys

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am a boy of 25 years and she is a 19- year old Junior High School graduate. We are neighbours and our relationship started a year ago. I made her understand that I am a Christian and therefore, our relationship would be platonic.

Everything was going on smoothly until I started getting complaints from her relations and friends about her immorality. When I confronted her, she denied it.

On June 30 this year, I personally saw her in the company of four boys. I reported her to my father and when he asked her, she could not utter a word.

On our way out, a man called her and she excused herself but did not return till later in the night.

I broke up with her the same day because I couldn’t stand the betrayal.

But my problem now is that she is going around insulting me.

I find this really embarrassing.

Nii, La

Dear Nii,

Try and get your parents or other family members to get in touch with the girl’s family to talk to her.

Besides at 25 years, you are still young. Concentrate on your studies or whatever you want to do in life for a career and stop getting involved in affairs of the opposite sex until you are ready to marry.