Obaa Yaa
My mother is stressing me.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We have been friends for the past two years and our parents know about our relationship. Her parents have even asked me to perform the marriage customary rites.
Recently, my mother returned from the hometown and told me that she has found a girl for me to marry.
I tried to convince her that I was not interested in any girl apart from my present one, but she won’t listen.
My father, however, told me that he would support whatever decision I take.
My uncle then said that I should respect my mother’s decision and go by it.
I can’t do that because I promised to marry my girl, besides my girl has spent so much money on me when I was down financially and was not working.
Apart from that we never had any disagreement because we love each other. How do I convince my mother that she is the right girl for me.
Barima,
Bogoso
Dear Barima,
You should let your mother explain to you why she doesn’t like your current girlfriend and is ready to give you a new lady.
If your mother is currently accusing the lady of so many things try and probe further.
If you are convinced that your mother’s attitude is as a result for dislike she has for your current girl, then you must include the support of your father or a pastor.
But if you figure out that your mother is after your interest, then you and your girlfriend would need a lot of prayers. Which means the two of you, would have change your lifestyle altogether and devote yourself to prayers to get rid of whatever is going on.
It will be a great commitment but efforts will be rewarding. If you are convinced that you can handle it, then go ahead and marry your girl. Your mother will eventually come to accept her when she realises that your wife is making you happy
Obaa Yaa
Let’s protect the girl child
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a mother whose children are all girls. I am having sleepless nights over cases of little girls being defiled lately.
I wished to give birth to boys because my parents gave birth to only girls.
I am getting worried with the way the girl child is taken advantage of by unscrupulous men and it appears these men are going unpunished.
What can I do to protect my children? We must begin to see actions geared at saving the girl child.
Araba,
Takoradi.
Dear Araba,
YOU must begin to have very frank talk with your little girls. Tell them about sex, and tell them it is wrong for little girls to engage in it.
Tell them that it is wrong for anyone, most especially strangers, to touch or fondle their private parts and should not hesitate to report such cases.
With the children who are too young to speak properly (below three years), make it a point to bath them yourself either in the morning or evening and observe their private parts to make sure are well.
Do not leave them in the company of boys or men for long periods without checking on them.
Obaa Yaa
My mum wants me to end my relationship
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 26 year old driver, and she is 24 and an apprentice seamstress. We have known each other for three years.
I was having launch when my girl entered with another man but she didn’t see me.
When I asked who the man was, she said he was from her hometown and was invited by him for a drink. I just slapped her and she left.
Obaa, I had seen this man with my girlfriend another night and when I questioned them, he tried to fight.
I slapped him and he went to the police station to report that someone had assaulted him and stolen his necklace, watch and an amount of money.
The matter got to my mother and I was asked to pay Gh¢8,000 for assault.
My mother says, I should break up with the girl but I love her and can’t do that. What should I do?
Efe, Mallam.
*****
Dear Isaac,
Your girlfriend needs to be talked to instead of slaps. Let her understand that you felt threatened by the man who is not a mutual friend to the two of you.
You must explain to her that even though this man is from her town, she should have introduced him to you and also make an effort not to be with him at places and times that arouse suspicion.
This would be the first part of saving your relationship. The second part is that you need to control your temper as violence would always land you in trouble.
Finally you need to reassure your mother that you would never act the way you did again.
