Obaa Yaa
Am I wicked?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I met and befriended another girl when my girlfriend travelled out of the country. I made her to understand that my first girl was more or less my wife, so marriage would be out of the question between us, and she understood.
My girl would be returning home within a few months, and this other girl is now saying that she would rather break up with me.
She also has been sending friends to talk to me and to plead on her behalf.
The girl is again saying that I am a wicked person without feelings, and that I have used her. I know that she wants me to feel guilty, but I don’t.
Am I actually wicked like she’s saying?
Efua
Swedru,
Dear Efua,
Yes, I do believe that somehow you have treated the girl badly, and the fact that you are almost man and wife does not make you guiltless, because the end result is that you only used her to pass the time of waiting for the return of your first girl.
You can at least try and be nice to her and let her go gen tly.
But don’t make things worse by prolonging the relations
Obaa Yaa
I am sexually attracted to children
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young man residing in Tamale. I am 40 years old and I have got my own business which is going on successfully.
The nature of my job had made me richer and am able to afford anything that I want.
My only problem is that I need a partner but I don’t fall in love with matured women. I am attracted to children.
I have had an encounter with so many women who are ‘marriage materials and type’ but none of them touch my heart.
In my previous relationship, the girl I dated was 15 years. She took me as a big brother but to me she was my lover.
Now that she is 22 and I can marry her, I have lost interest in her.
Obaa Yaa, what do you think is actually wrong with me? Is it normal? How can I have a partner if I continue to feel this way?
Dabo, Tamale.
Dear Dabo,
I don’t even know how to start this conversation. It is not everything that your heart desires that you should go for.
You need to understand that your desire for children sexually is criminal under the laws of this land so it should not be entertained.
I suggest you seek the assistance of psychologist to advise you or else you might end up in jail.
You might be suffering from pedophilia which is a condition of being sexually attracted to children. You need psychiatric help.
I suggest you also speak to your pastors to help you in prayers, in case it might be spiritual.
Obaa Yaa
The banker deceived me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I fell in love with a banker who told me he wasn’t married and therefore, wanted to marry me.
We started going out and spending time together. He went to the extent of going to see my parents for the engagement list.
It was only after I got pregnant when he confessed he was already married and could not afford to marry me as a second wife.
The problem is that for the past five years, this man has refused to provide for the upkeep of the child.
He is not showing any commitments towards the child and making things difficult for me.
I am currently finding it difficult to take care of the child’s feeding and clothing.
My child is very brilliant at school and my fear is that I cannot give him the best of education since I am not working.
Prisca, Dodowa.
Dear Prisca,
Your story is a sad and unfortunate one. He just ‘toyed’ with you and was successful.
It’s about time women check about the men who propose to them.
And in the first place, why were you intimate with him, knowing very well that you were not married?
Report the matter to the Domestic Violence and Victims Support Unit (DOVVSU) of the Ghana Police Service, formerly known as Women and Juvenile Unit (WAJU) immediately.
They would summon him and question him about the upkeep of his child and employ legal means to make him accept responsibility for the child.