Obaa Yaa
She believes l am cheating on her
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Of late,my wife picks up quarrels with me without any provocations and strongly believes that l am cheating on her.
Though l was once caught with a lady and embarrassed, that should not be the guarantee or the reason for the daily accusations and casting aspersions on me.
I close late from work and prefer to be left alone to think about other things in relation with my work but she fails to give me that peaceful atmosphere to operate.
I sometimes feel like staying with my friends at weekends, yet she keeps bothering me that l am cheating on her.
She is not prepared to believe me despite the explanations lhave given her.
What should l do?
Kwame, Swedru
Dear Kwame,
You must get it clear that decisions or actions you take in life will definitely have dire consequences on you and your family.
Per the narrative, you have called for the tune and must be prepared to dance according to it. You have wilfully created the atmosphere of mistrust and you should not blame her actions because she can’t tell when you will falter again.
You have demonstrated to your wife that you cannot be trusted so far as fidelity is concerned.
I believe prior to her actions, there was no occasion on which she had attacked you for cheating on her.
As a husband, you have the obligation to create a congenial atmosphere and have effective period to dialogue with your wife at home.
Though you close late from work, and become very tired and have no time to spend with your wife, you, however, have plans to spend time with your friends.
I think a change of attitude is what you ought to do and demonstrate to your wife that you have changed for the better.
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
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Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
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Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.