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Sadness, pain and adversity have their use
Sadness and melancholy are feelings we would generally avoid if we could, but of course we cannot. Joy and sorrow are mixed and stirred together to make up the substance of our lives. The Roman poet, Ovid, knew that when he wrote, “No pleasure is unalloyed: Some trouble ever intrudes upon our happiness.”
And modern psychology seems to confirm this viewpoint. Dr. Norman Bradburn wrote, “Happiness is resultant of the relative strengths of positive and negative feelings rather than an absolute amount of one or the other.”
Happiness seems universally accepted as a desirable state in our lives, but what is the purpose of sadness? The somewhat pessimistic preacher of Ecclesiastes had high praise for sorrow when he wrote, “Sorrow is better than laughter: for by the sadness of the countenance the heart is made better.” It could be debated whether sorrow is better than laughter, but most certainly it has an oft times unappreciated value in our lives. We can learn lessons in moments of melancholy that would escape us if all our days were filled with sun and smiles; lessons of patience, endurance, long-suffering and courage in the face of adversity. And these lessons we might well ponder in our pleasure-seeking world.
We are daily indoctrinated to believe that sadness is unnatural, that life should be one steady stream of joy and laughter, and if we are not happy there is something wrong with us.
This shallow view of life can lead us to unfortunate conclusions. Young married people may seek divorce at the first signs of difficulties not knowing that every marriage has its problems.
Others of us may go deep into debt to try and buy our way out of depression.
As a people, we have grown so intent on living lives free from all sorrow that we now seek stimulants and tranquilisers, drugs and panaceas at the slightest sign of sadness. While sometimes medication may be necessary to get us through a crisis, we should not let it rob us of the healing and the strength that we can gain in facing our afflictions and working out our problems.
A bit of melancholy contemplation can be for the injured heart and mind what rest and recuperation are to the body, a chance to let life’s inner powers work and mend and heal the injury, the trauma to the soul which brought about the sorrow.
Yes, sadness is a part of life, and while we do not seek for sorrow, neither do we fearfully flee from it.
It is often the shadows gathering about us that allow us to more clearly discern the light of the Lord’s spirit as He sends it forth to lift us and guide us on our way.
As William Shakespeare wrote, “Sweet are the uses of adversity.” That is counsel we might well keep in mind. The adversity and sorrow we go through may be bitter, but the experience may leave us wiser and more compassionate humans.
The greatest lessons of this life are gained from experience. The finest doctors are not those who have only studied medicine but those who also understand suffering. The staunchest fighters for freedom are those who have been in bondage. The most dedicated teachers are those who have felt the stifling handicap of ignorance. And the wisest spiritual counsellors are those who have seen the sad effects of sin. We are in this world to learn and grow through experience, and sometimes that growth is painful. Even Jesus Christ we are told, “Iearned…obedience by the things which he suffered.”
Likewise, each of us will experience some grief and sorrow in this world. The richest, most powerful, most intelligent, most resourceful of us cannot escape what Hamlet called, “the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.” Physical disease, accidents, the inevitability of age, darkness and depression, sorrows of the spirit and emotions, troubles and tragedies; any or all of these can strike us. Ultimately there is no insulation against the stresses, strains and sadness of this life.
These trials can be to us a crushing burden; or they can be a refining fire to purge from us the trivial cares and concerns which can cloud our vision of what is really important in our lives.
This kind of learning will not come easily, but the truly valuable things in life never do. The adversity will not be sweet, but the uses and results may be if we triumph over our tribulations.
May we remember this when sorrow strikes us in large or small measure? Remember that God is still in His heaven. There can be a purpose in our pain, because some of our most priceless wisdom comes only through experience. And if we endure it well, eventually our grief will be turned to gladness.
Email: samueleghan@gmail.com
By Samuel Enos Eghan
Conflict at work is more common than you might think. According to 2022 research by The Myers-Briggs Company, more than a third of the workforce reports dealing with conflict often, very often, or all the time in the workplace. The same report found that managers spend an average of four hours per week dealing with conflict, and nearly 25 per cent of people think their managers handle conflict poorly or very poorly.
Addressing a dispute might feel tense or awkward, but resolving the conflict is typically well worth it in the long run. Whether you’re trying to mediate conflict between colleagues or are directly involved, here are seven steps you can take to manage workplace conflict.
1. Don’t put it off
Facing conflict head-on is hard. However, waiting too long to address it can negatively impact your emotional well-being, focus, and the entire office environment. If you’re feeling angry, letting that emotion fester can also escalate it over time. This can make you less responsive to other points of view and make it harder to resolve the issue.
The sooner you can address the conflict, the better it will be for you, the person you disagree with, and your entire team.
2. Learn all you can about the problem
It’s important to determine the type of conflict you’re dealing with. Begin by considering the cause of the conflict. For example, ask yourself whether someone said something that upset you or if you have emotions of anger and resentment that stemmed from something that happened.
Then try to identify if it’s a task, relationship, value, or team conflict. Once you know what type of conflict it is, you can work to resolve it with specific tactics for that situation.
If you skip this step, you may waste time or escalate the situation further by trying to address issues irrelevant to the real conflict.
3. Actively listen
Listen attentively when people share their side of the story. Active listening is one of the most valuable professional skills you can possess. This type of listening involves not only hearing what the other person is saying but also listening to understand their point of view.
No matter your role in conflict, it’s easy to begin sharing your opinion with little regard for the other people involved. However, it’s important to learn about all sides of a disagreement to make well-informed decisions before drawing conclusions.
To reach a resolution, you must step back and prioritize listening over talking. Ultimately, that will encourage the other person to do the same when it’s your turn to speak. –source: betterup.com
Today, I focus on the Temple Of Praise Ministries International (TOP Church) in Helsinki, as I continue my description of personalities or institutions and their accomplishments as members of the Ghanaian Diaspora in Finland.
The TOP Church in Finland has seen significant strides and accomplishments that must be made known to the public. 
Some history
The Church was established in Finland in September 2016. Since its inception, it has steadily grown both spiritually and numerically, by the grace of God, as disclosed to me by Mr Matthew Anini Twumasi, the Presiding Elder of TOP’s branch in Finland. The TOP Church has other branches across Africa, Europe, and America.
The Church in Finland was founded with a vision to create a welcoming and dynamic community where people could experience God’s love and grace (see, www.topchurchfinland.org). According to Presiding Elder Matthew, the TOP Church operates within a unique environment where Christianity coexists with what is seen as a largely secular society.
Despite this, he submits, there are significant opportunities for outreach, unity, and demonstrating the love of Christ through service and community engagement.
Activities
Church services at the TOP Church are typically held on Sundays for the main worship. In addition, there are mid-week prayer sessions, Saturday prayer services, and a half-night service held on the last Friday of every month. “We also organise quarterly programs”, Elder Matthew added.
His impression of the Church so far has been positive. “It is a vibrant and welcoming community where members are committed to worship, fellowship, and supporting one another in faith”, he stated.
In sum, Elder Matthew said the Church continues to grow by God’s grace. “We remain hopeful and committed to spreading the Gospel, strengthening the faith of our members, and making a positive impact in society”, he continued.
Achievements
The TOP Church has a number of achievements and achievements. Some of the strengths include strong community bonds, cultural diversity, and deep commitment to spiritual growth.
I also remember that during the COVID-19 period, I heard that the TOP Church was one such bodies that hugely supported its members and others to cope with the situation.
According to Elder Matthew, the challenges facing the church include “adapting to cultural differences, engaging the younger generation, expanding outreach in a secular society, and securing a permanent place of worship”.
Role in the Ghanaian community in Finland
The TOP Church plays a prominent role as a religious group that serves Ghanaian migrants and others in the Finnish society.
Thus, the TOP Church is a religious body for Ghanaian migrants in Finland and other nationalities who want to worship with them for diversity and better intercultural and multicultural understanding.
The Church also has mechanisms in place to support its members who are bereaved as a way to commiserate with them in times of death and funerals.
The Ghanaian community has played a vital role in the growth of the Church. Their strong sense of fellowship, dedication to worship, and active participation have helped build a solid foundation and attract others to the ministry, according to Elder Matthew.
Integration
By its activities, the TOP Church is helping to ensure integration of its members well into the Finish society.
This is important since social interaction and citizens’ well-being are an important part of the integration process.
The role of migrant associations and groups such as TOP Church acting as bridge-builders for the integration and inclusion of migrants through participation in the decision making process and by acting as a representative voice is highly appreciated in Finland. Thank you!
GHANA MATTERS column appears fortnightly. Written in simple, layman’s terms, it concentrates on matters about Ghana and beyond. It focuses on everyday life issues relating to the social, cultural, economic, religious, political, health, sports, youth, gender, etc. It strives to remind us all that Ghana comes first. The column also takes a candid look at the meanings and repercussions of our actions, especially those things we take for granted or even ignore. There are key Ghanaian values we should uphold rather than disregard with impunity. We should not overlook the obvious. We need to search for the hidden or deeply embedded values and try to project them.
With Dr Perpetual Crentsil
