Obaa Yaa
We are friends with benefits
Dear Obaa Yaa
I have been dating my boyfriend for seven years. I later met a male friend a year ago and we are engaging in ‘friends with benefits.’
I have grown to love this guy more than my boyfriend. I always think about him, dream about him, call him and text him more than l text my boyfriend.
I even got pregnant for him, pinned it on my boyfriend and told him I wanted to abort the pregnancy because I knew that when l give birth, the baby will not look like my boyfriend and he might one day discover my secret deeds.
He gave me GH¢ 2,500.00 to abort the pregnancy.
I have realised that my friend is only interested in having sex but not ready for marriage.
I am eager and looking forward to a permanent relationship which will end up in marriage but he said no.
I feel betrayed and fooled but I still have him as a friend.
Pls what should I do?
Jessica- Accra.
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Dear Jessica,
You cannot eat your cake and have it. Since you do not love your boyfriend, there is no need to pretend as if you love him.
Break up the relationship with one and stick to the one who loves you more subsequently marry you.
You will embarrass yourself if you become pregnant for your friend again and try to conceal it.
You should know that it is easy to get someone to make love with you for the fun of it but you can hardly get a man who will genuinely love you and perhaps ready to marry you.
Make a wise decision now because life is full of challenges, surprises and f smart people who are opportunists.
I am in my final year in the university. My elder sister has been very supportive after the death of our parents.
My sister has a boyfriend who visits often. Anytime he comes around, she wonders why I don’t entertain him and why I suddenly find an excuse to leave the room. She takes it as me being cold, even jealous, and it angers her more than I can even imagine.
She has no idea about what is going on behind her back. He has asked me out on several occasions and looks at me in a lustful manner.
But my problem is that I never told my sister the real reason I avoid her boyfriend. I have kept my distance, not out of hate for her or for him, but because I carry a secret that would break her heart.
Princess, Tema.
Dear Princess,
Why are you keeping this away from your sister? As long as you continue to live under the same roof with your sister, tell her about her boyfriend’s behaviour.
Have you by any chance confided in any relative? I’ll advise you to open up to someone, at least to take the weight off your shoulder.
Act fast before the situation exacerbates.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 23 years who lives in a compound house around Kasoa in the Central Region. I live with my auntie.
We are not always at home because she spends most of the time at the market due to her business, and I am mostly on campus.
One sunny afternoon, I overheard some tenants talking about another who takes her bath in a basin and throws the water away. We have two big bathrooms, but just because she doesn’t want to scrub, she has refused to bathe there.
Although she is usually not around due to her work as a nurse, it doesn’t warrant her to do as she pleases. We have spoken to the landlord about it, but she seems unconcerned. What should I do?
Beatrice, Accra
Dear Beatrice,
I am surprised that your landlord seems unperturbed.
Have you considered having a conversation with the tenant to find out why she ignores the chores? She does not seem bothered about the kind of perception the other tenants have about her.
Why would a young lady who is a nurse and an advocate for healthy living be this lazy and unconcerned about her surroundings?
No excuse should be tolerated just because she’s a nurse and mostly not around.
