Obaa Yaa
She’s too friendly with boys
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 25 and she is 22. We have been lovers for some time now and have agreed to get married if God permits.
We are so much in love to an extent that, we cannot go a day without calling each other or seeing each other.
My problem is that she is too friendly with boys. I have warned her several times but all have fallen on deaf ears. She told me not to think about that because they are her friends and she just entertains them for fun.
I love her and I’m afraid someone may take her out of my hands.
Is it nice for a girl (who already has a lover) to be so friendly with other boys? I am totally confused and don’t know what to do.
Barimah, Swedru.
Dear Barima,
YOU seem to have a problem with insecurity. You stated that she always shows how much she cares about you.
I believe you could complain if that is affecting the attention you crave for.
Is she just friendly or she is actually intimate and makes suggestive body contacts with these male friends?
If your answer is no, then I think you should relax and enjoy your relationship with this girl.
You can also let her know that you can’t stand it when you see her with the male friends and for that matter she should stop.
Trying to stifle her may rather kill the relationship.
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
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Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
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Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.