Obaa Yaa
My wife is untidy
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My wife is the only woman I have lived with that is making things difficult for me.
Growing up, I have lived with my mother, aunties and sisters and they were never untidy when it comes to keeping the home.
We currently have two children, who are four and two years old. The children keep themselves busy without much trouble yet my wife cannot keep our house neat.
When I travel for days, I come home to meet dishes left in the sink and an untidy environment.
She would also leave dirty diapers in the hall or packed somewhere in the kitchen.
Clothes she had worn have taken over the chairs and even the bed. You will see wigs lying on the center table and brassier hanging on the sofa.
Anytime I raise concerns about her attitude, she tells me she would put a stop to it.
Every weekend turns into a marathon of cleaning, washing and scrubbing because my wife will not do it.
After six years of marriage I am exhausted and honestly part of me feels like walking away or renting a new place for myself .
Amponsah, Madina
Dear Amponsah,
IT is rather unfortunate things are happening this way in your home. In my opinion, you can assist your wife with the cleaning of the home after you have closed from work.
If that is impossible, you can employ a house or a nanny to assist your wife in cleaning.
Handling children can be stressful especially when they are not teenagers.
It will surprise you, she might be going through something and finding it difficult to address it.
Find time and communicate with her on how you want things to be done. You can also help by assisting her with some of the house chores.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We bumped into each other on orientation day as freshers on campus. I liked his smile, his choice of words, and charisma. I didn’t hesitate at all when he asked for my contact. Who wouldn’t want to be friends with a guy like this, I said to myself.
We texted more often, had conversations on phone, and our friendship literally grew very strong. We attended lectures together, studied together, hanged out together; everyone thought we were lovers.
He did everything for me—surprise dates, thoughtful gifts, pays my academic fees, and gives me a listening ear everyone would wish for.
One evening at a friend’s birthday party, standing in the middle of the audience, he proposed and asked me to be his girlfriend. I declined his proposal; this was because I have no feelings for him, and I just want us to be friends.
He is a man with good morals, so gentle, God-fearing, ambitious, a man every lady would wish for, but my heart just wasn’t in it. I wondered if love was supposed to be this complicated: the more he did, the more I felt like a friend, not a lover. He still wants me, but I want us to be just friends. What should I do?
Naa Kwarley, Kaneshie.
Dear Naa Kwarley,
This is a tough situation, and you’re handling it with both kindness and firmness.
Since you’ve already told him you’re not interested in a romantic relationship, it’s crucial to be clear and direct while still being respectful. I’d advise you to reiterate your feelings to him, emphasising that you value him as a person and appreciate what he’s done, but you see him more as a close friend. Make it clear that you hope you can still maintain a strong friendship, but it can’t be anything more.
It’s essential to be prepared for him to need space or time to process, so be patient and understanding.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a regular reader of your highly esteemed paper and I would like to know whether some amount of money is paid to those who write short stories for publication on the children’s page of your Weekly Spectator.
I wrote a short story which was published last month, and my friends who saw it told me that a token will be paid to anyone whose story is published.
A.J., Kwabenya.
Dear A.J.,
We don’t pay for short stories published on our children’s page. That opportunity is to encourage school children to develop the habit of writing. We believe that by publishing their short stories, they’ll be encouraged to write more.
The paper is open to everyone who wants to share ideas or write about a concern.
