Obaa Yaa
My husband is threatening me
Obaa Yaa,
Our rent is due and my husband wants us to move into a house I’ve built with my own money and I said no, saying that, “That’s not the plan I have for the building. We can’t move in.”
My plan has always been to rent it out. The income would give me some sort of stability. The moment I said that, he became furious. He started calling me selfish, disrespectful, and all kinds of names. Now he is threatening divorce because I refused to move into the house I built alone. Kindly read my story and tell me if I’m wrong to say no to him.
Baaba, Mankesim.
Dear Baaba,
You are not wrong for saying no, but this situation isn’t really about right or wrong. It’s about priorities, communication, and how both of you can handle pressure as couple.
Your situation makes sense. You are the owner of the house.
Your husband is reacting from stress. If your rent is due and housing becomes uncertain, he may see your house as immediate solution. That doesn’t justify the insults or threats.
Calling you names and threating divorce is not a healthy response. It shift the issue from problem-solving to emotional pressure.
My dad has threatened not to attend my wedding; instead, he has been raining curses on me.
Each morning and night, he would call and rain curses on me, telling me I was bringing shame and bad luck to my marriage because I told him, my step father will be present.
I have personally been to his house to invite him, yet he keeps telling me he can’t make it. What should I do?
Kwesi,
Suhum
Dear Kwesi,
Your dad’s curses, guilt, and threats come from his pain and fear of losing his role, but that doesn’t make his behaviour idle.
You can love him as your father and still set a firm boundary for him.
If he crosses that line, end the call or stop replying his messages. Protect your wedding and your peace by limiting contact, especially late at night and early morning, and stand by your partner.
Remember, respecting your dad doesn’t mean erasing the role your stepdad played – both can matter without problems.
Don’t let his behaviour dictate the start of your marriage. You can’t control if he comes around, but you can control not letting his anger affect your emotions.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Before we got married five years ago, my husband told me that his former wife left him shortly after he lost his job following a financial scandal which rocked the company.
But thanks be to God that the court cleared him and ordered the company to pay him for the five years he stayed at home for wrongful dismissal.
As soon as this ex-wife heard that the company had complied with the court’s orders and paid him, she shamelessly declared that she was making a comeback and has vowed to kick me out of my matrimonial home at all cost.
She promised to hire ‘machomen’ to throw my things out of the house and was prepared to bear the consequence for that action.
Even though my husband has assured me that this would never happen, her ex is bent on disturbing my peace.
What should I do?
Adzo,
Tafo.
Dear Bertha,
The lady is threatening to use violence against you. That’s constitutes a breach of the law and she must be reported to the police for issuing those threats.
However, I will advise you to discuss it with your husband so that you are not seen as acting entirely on your own.
As a matter of fact, it is only the police that can handle this matter professionally and must be involved, unless of course your husband talks to his ex-wife to stop harassing you. So have a good discussion with your husband about the matter. All the best.
