Obaa Yaa
Mum insists l marry wealthy young man
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We have been dating over three years now with much progress for which reason we have decided to marry, but my mother is not in favour of this gentleman.
My mother is insisting that l should marry a rich young man instead of my boyfriend. She has gone further to introduce me to her rich friend’s son to make the necessary arrangements for our wedding.
I have told my boyfriend about the latest moves by my mother and he has suggested that we elope together.
Though this plan will take me from my parents as long as l wish, l consider it a great disrespect to them.
Kindly help me out of this problem since l am getting confused.
Adzoa, Accra.
Dear Adzoa,
I am glad you have taken the right decision by writing to this column.
Though children ought to respect their parents and guardians and also seek their advice, there are occasions parents fail to listen to the views of their children before arriving at certain critical decisions they take concerning them.
You may consider eloping from the town and also the reach of your parents the best option, but should something happen to you tomorrow who will come to your aid?
Try to explain your position to some senior members of your family who can champion your decision by holding talks with your parents and help in resolving the problem.
No matter the differences, your parents can never be replaced by any other person, hence the need to resolve the issues and promote peace in the family.
Obaa Yaa
Let’s protect the girl child
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a mother whose children are all girls. I am having sleepless nights over cases of little girls being defiled lately.
I wished to give birth to boys because my parents gave birth to only girls.
I am getting worried with the way the girl child is taken advantage of by unscrupulous men and it appears these men are going unpunished.
What can I do to protect my children? We must begin to see actions geared at saving the girl child.
Araba,
Takoradi.
Dear Araba,
YOU must begin to have very frank talk with your little girls. Tell them about sex, and tell them it is wrong for little girls to engage in it.
Tell them that it is wrong for anyone, most especially strangers, to touch or fondle their private parts and should not hesitate to report such cases.
With the children who are too young to speak properly (below three years), make it a point to bath them yourself either in the morning or evening and observe their private parts to make sure are well.
Do not leave them in the company of boys or men for long periods without checking on them.
Obaa Yaa
My mum wants me to end my relationship
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 26 year old driver, and she is 24 and an apprentice seamstress. We have known each other for three years.
I was having launch when my girl entered with another man but she didn’t see me.
When I asked who the man was, she said he was from her hometown and was invited by him for a drink. I just slapped her and she left.
Obaa, I had seen this man with my girlfriend another night and when I questioned them, he tried to fight.
I slapped him and he went to the police station to report that someone had assaulted him and stolen his necklace, watch and an amount of money.
The matter got to my mother and I was asked to pay Gh¢8,000 for assault.
My mother says, I should break up with the girl but I love her and can’t do that. What should I do?
Efe, Mallam.
*****
Dear Isaac,
Your girlfriend needs to be talked to instead of slaps. Let her understand that you felt threatened by the man who is not a mutual friend to the two of you.
You must explain to her that even though this man is from her town, she should have introduced him to you and also make an effort not to be with him at places and times that arouse suspicion.
This would be the first part of saving your relationship. The second part is that you need to control your temper as violence would always land you in trouble.
Finally you need to reassure your mother that you would never act the way you did again.
