Relationship
Is your marriage counsellor or couples therapist right for you?
Ensure to have a say in whoever counsels you
As a single or couple preparing to get married, take personal interest in who counsels you as your marriage therapist or counsellor. Because who you choose to marry is one of the most important decisions you would ever make in your life.
Pre-marital counselling ought not to be some formality you need to satisfy in order to get married. If you are interested in how your life and future turns out, then do not take for granted the person who prepares you for your marriage journey.
Always remember that your marriage can make or break you. Therefore, make sure you have a say in who counsels you, especially if you realise that the marriage counsellor is not qualified and has very little pre-marital counselling experience.
For most of you, because you are in the Church environment, you are not given the chance to choose who prepares you for your marriage. I understand that perfectly. However, if you realise the counsellor you have been assigned will not be helpful in giving you that solid foundation for your marriage journey, then I would encourage you to ask your Senior Pastor or the Head of Counselling Unit to give you another counsellor you would be more comfortable with.
Make this request in a respectful manner. In many cases, if there are other marriage counsellors available, I know the Church would be more than willing to grant your request by giving you another counsellor.
Nevertheless, in an extreme situation where you don’t get any replacement because it is only one counsellor you are all stuck to, I would encourage you to seek professional pre-marital counselling outside while you still go through the pre-marital counselling package of your Church.
Do not ever rebel against your Church! Instead, get additional professional counselling from a counselling facility like ours (Counsellor Prince & Associates Consult—CPAC, which is a mental health and counselling consult accredited by Ghana Psychology Council).
Indeed, such professional services would attract some fees; however, if experiencing a happy, fulfilling and lasting marriage is your main goal, then no cost would be too much for you to get professional support.
Qualities to look out for in Your Marriage Counsellor
As you embark on the journey of marriage, remember that seeking help from a professional marriage therapist or counsellor can be a valuable asset to your relationship.
I admit there are so many characteristics you would have to consider when choosing your marriage therapist or counsellor. Nevertheless, the following are the core qualities that your marriage counsellor or therapist must possess:
1. Respect for your Christian faith and values
If you are a Christian searching for a qualified Christian marriage counsellor, look for a marriage counsellor who aligns with your Christian beliefs and values. It would be helpful if the counsellor is a strong Christian himself or herself. They should have a solid understanding of biblical principles and must have the required skills to effectively integrate such principles into their counselling approach.
As a Christian couple, it will be a plus if your marriage counsellor is doctrinally solid, secure in his own marriage and family relationships (1 Timothy 3:4-5; Titus 1:7), and living in obedience to God’s Word within his or her marriage.
2. Expertise in marriage counselling
Look for a counsellor with specific training and experience in couple counselling or therapy. The counsellor should have a master’s or undergraduate degree in marriage or couple counselling, or at least some form of professionally accredited certificate in marriage or couplesss counselling.
A professional certificate such as, Counsellor Prince & Associates Consult’s ‘Certificate in Counselling and Marriage Therapy’, which is accredited by Ghana Psychology Council (GPC). In extreme cases where the person does not have any of these training, you could look out for at least general counselling or psychology training, in addition to some years of experience in handling couples.
Within the context of Christian training, I know many recognised and accredited Christian Seminaries and Pastoral Schools integrate some basic marriage counselling courses to equip the pastors. However, it is not all pastors who have the required expertise to provide effective pre-marital counselling.
Ultimately, find a counsellor who has specific relevant experience in working with couples and marriage-related issues. They must have some years of practice and a track record of helping couples overcome challenges and improve their relationships.
To be continued …
Source: Excerpts from ‘Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage’ Book by REV. COUNSELLOR PRINCE OFFEI (Psychotherapist and Marriage Therapist).
COUNSELLOR PRINCE & ASSOCIATES CONSULT (CPAC)
Building and maintaining healthy relationships is an important part of looking after our mental health. Here are six top tips to support you:
1. Get to know yourself
Take time to appreciate yourself and connect with your emotions. Being aware of your feelings allows you to express yourself clearly and effectively. Poor emotional regulation can negatively affect your mental wellbeing.
2. Put in the work
Healthy relationships are built, not found. They require commitment and a willingness to accommodate each other’s needs.
3. Set and respect boundaries
Boundaries communicate what you appreciate and what you don’t like in a relationship. For example, respecting your need for alone time helps prevent unrealistic expectations and reduces pressure on the relationship.
4. Talk and listen
Disagreements are normal. Focus on listening to understand, not just to respond. Be open about your emotions and vulnerabilities with people you trust.
5. Let go of control
You can only control your actions, not those of others. Accepting this reduces stress and saves time while fostering healthier interactions.
6. Reflect and learn
Healthy expression of feelings helps you respond appropriately to others. Often, anger stems from hurt; recognizing this allows for better communication and relationship building. Reflect on the relationships that work well in your life, identify their positive qualities, and apply these lessons elsewhere.
As parents on a mission, raise children who are not just successful, but cultured, morally upright, and ready to lead. The secret? Blend biblical principles and traditional values with practical parenting strategies that work in today’s world.
Ghana’s culture is built on respect, community, and integrity, and when combined with Christian values like love and forgiveness, it is a powerful combo for parenting. Teaching children about traditions, biblical truths, or the importance of greeting elders is not just about preserving culture—it is about building character.
5 Practical steps to raise disciplined, cultured kids
1. Set clear expectations
Explain rules and values clearly. For example, “We respect elders because God says ‘Honour your father and mother’” (Ephesians 6:2). Also, “We respect elders because they have lived longer and know more.” Align household rules with cultural values like obedience and responsibility.
2. Lead by example
Children mimic what they see. Show respect to elders, speak kindly, and demonstrate honesty in daily life. Proverb: “If you show a child how to behave, they’ll behave.” Moreover, Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way they should go …” You can also introduce them to traditional games like “Oware” or “Ampe,” which teach strategic thinking.
3. Teach emotional intelligence
Help children label emotions (“You’re feeling angry”). Encourage resolving conflicts peacefully—like using “sorry” to mend relationships. Ghanaian proverb: “A smooth sea doesn’t make a skilled sailor.”
4. Assign responsibilities
Give age-appropriate chores (e.g., fetching water, helping with cooking). It builds accountability and pride in contributing. Link chores to cultural values like communal living (“We all help in the community”) and biblical stewardship.
5. Embed culture and faith in daily life
Cook traditional foods like Banku, Jollof rice, or Fufu, tell folktales, or celebrate local festivals with prayer and gratitude. Discuss values like ubuntu (I am because we are) to teach teamwork and empathy; alongside God’s love for unity (John 13:34-35). Make culture fun and relatable.
Some other awesome ways to make Ghanaian culture relatable for children include:
- Sharing popular Ghanaian artists like Joe Mettle, Uncle Ato, or Obaapa Christie, and teaching traditional dances like Kpanlogo or Adowa.
- Exploring Ghanaian crafts like kente weaving or bead-making through online workshops.
- Talking about festivals like Homowo (celebrated by the Ga people) or Aboakyer (a deer-hunting festival) using cool videos and pictures online.
Why this matters for Ghana’s future leaders
- Respect and integrity: Cultured children grow into leaders who respect others and uphold ethical standards.
- Community mindset: Values like cooperation and serving others (Galatians 5:13) prepare them to contribute positively to society.
- Resilience: Cultural roots give children a strong identity, helping them navigate life’s challenges.
Parenting in the digital age
- Balance screen time with cultural activities. Use Anansi stories or Bible stories on YouTube or play Oware to teach strategy and patience.
- Discuss social media etiquette through the lens of respect, responsibility, and biblical wisdom (Proverbs 15:4).
Final thought for Ghanaian parents
February 2026 is a fresh start. Blend Ghana’s timeless values with modern tools to raise leaders who are grounded, respectful, and ready to thrive.
To be continued …
Source: REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI and Counselor Blessing Offei’s insights on relationships, marriage, and parenting in Ghana. He is an author, mental health professional, lecturer, and marriage counsellor at COUNSELOR PRINCE & ASSOCIATES CONSULT (CPAC COUNSELLOR TRAINING INSTITUTE). He is the author of several books, including “Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage” and “A Counsellor’s Guide to Using ‘Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage’ Effectively.”
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