Relationship
…tips on coping with step parents
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1. Communicate your expectations
Step-parent(s) have a ‘job’ in the family and in the life of their children. They will not have the same role as biological parents, but they will still be around.
As a stepparent, tell the children what you want them to do for you, and what you do not want them to do.
Do not approach them intending to tell them how they have upset you, but to establish a line of communication
2. Try to be impartial
When conflicts arise, children are more likely to agree with their biological parents than their stepparents. Recognise this and try to view her words and actions without factoring in your relationship with her.
She will appreciate you siding with her on an issue even though you may not have come to appreciate her yet.
3. Recognise the step parent’s challenges
A child may not like that their parent getting remarried, but the stepparent has a task of winning over the whole family. Give him time to get used to being around new children. Being understanding with him should help reduce the amount he gets frustrated with their new family.
4. Let your stepparent know if you are uncomfortable
It is common for relationships between a stepparent and a stepchild to suffer from gender confusion. For example, a stepfather may be confused about whether it is appropriate to hug a stepdaughter the same way as a biological daughter. If he is being too physically affectionate for your comfort, let him know.
5. Let your biological parent(s) help
If you are less laid-back than your siblings, you may have trouble adjusting to the new stepparent. Let your parents know that you want the family to be happy, but want them to help you adjust. Communicating that you want to do your best to get to know your stepparent will improve your relationship with your biological and stepparents.
6. Do not expect an overnight friendship
You will not immediately become close with a stepparent, and that is okay. In fact, his or her relationship with you will never be the same as with your biological parents. If a stepparent is coming on too strong, let him know you just want to take it easy for a while. There is nothing wrong with letting a relationship develop naturally over time
Source: wikihow.life.com
1. Talk early and often
It is never too early to start talking with and listening to your children about the first day of school. Ask them what they think school will be like and see if they have any specific concerns so that you will have time to address it over the next couple of weeks. It is totally normal to have first day jitters.
2. Go to the orientation
If your child’s school is hosting an orientation or back-to-school night, take advantage of it. Often children are worried that they will not know how to get to the bathroom, where to eat lunch, or how to get to a locker. If your school does not offer one or you are unable to make it, ask the teacher if it would be possible to stop by for a visit. Teachers are usually in their classrooms prepping for the new school year in advance.
3. Meet the teacher
For kids, wondering if they will like their teacher is a big source of fear. If your child isn’t comfortable in the teacher’s classroom, he or she will be less likely to be ready to learn. Many teachers will make themselves available for a phone or video call or will return an email if a visit is not possible.
4. For younger children, read books or watch educational cartoons
In August, local libraries will often display books about starting school or going to a new school. These materials can help children read about and see what a typical day will consist of and what they will learn in school.
5. Take your kids shopping with you
Your kids will be more excited to use their back-to-school supplies if they picked them out. Doing so will help them feel prepared and will also provide an opportunity to talk about how the new supplies might be used in the coming year.
6. Set up school “zones” and establish clear expectations
At home, establish a location for school materials such as a place to put backpack and lunchbox, and set up a distraction-free homework zone (like the kitchen table with the TV turned off and phones/tablets put away). Set up homework and study times (for example, Monday–Thursday from 3:30–5 pm) to help manage expectations and build and maintain good routines.
7. Practice your new routine
Both children and adults can benefit from practicing the new school routine one to two weeks before school actually starts. Stage a morning dry run to see how long it takes you and your children to get out of the door in the morning. It will not only help you predict how early you and your kids need to get up, but your children will benefit from learning what to expect each weekday.
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Having a good relationship with your child’s teacher will make it easier for you to share concerns and work together to help your child thrive. Here are some tips for building a partnership. Here are some tips to help parents build a good relationship with their child’s teacher.
1. Meet with the teacher and staff early
Teachers are usually swamped at the start of the school year. But try to meet as soon as the teacher can. At your first meeting, find out how the teacher prefers to communicate it can be either by phone, email, or some other method.
2. Help the teacher get to know your child.
Sharing information is key to a good parent-teacher relationship. Tell the teacher about your child’s interests, strengths, and challenges. If your child has an special need, make the teacher a aware, and let the him or her know about situations outside of school that might impact your child’s learning or behaviour.
3. Be respectful of the teacher’s time.
Be on time for appointments, whether they are phone calls, video meetings, or parent-teacher conferences. Try to wrap things up within the allotted time. The teacher may have other parents scheduled after you or other meetings and commitments. You can always set up another call to finish up.
4. Recognise the teacher’s efforts.
If you are meeting in the classroom, look for displays of students’ work or teaching materials that you can compliment. If you are somewhere else, start things off with a positive statement, like something your child enjoys about the teacher’s class.
5. Never talk negatively about a teacher in front of your child.
Showing your respect for a teacher will set a good example for your child.
6. Participate in school events.
Take part in school events when possible. This shows that you’re part of the school community and want to be supportive. Offer to volunteer in a way that works for you, whether it’s at school or at home on your own time.
7. Say “thank you.”
Show your appreciation for the big or little things the teacher and other staff do for your child. Thank-you notes and emails can go a long way toward building positive relationships.
