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Obaa Yaa

I made a wrong choice

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Dear Obaa Yaa,

I started dating a young man in my neighbourhood. Inter­estingly, I became pregnant for him, without knowing him better.

The moment I got pregnant, I told him to go and see my family and pay the bride price.

He did the needful and I was so happy that he made me proud.

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It has been hell for me after the marriage ceremony. He has become very authoritative and abuses me verbally.

Anytime there is a disagreement between the two of us, he would embarrass me whether people were around or not and later apologise.

I have moved out from my matrimonial home but my par­ents are telling me to go back because he is still my wedded husband.

What should I do?

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Baaba, Sunyani

Dear Baaba,

My advice is that you consider reuniting with your husband. Engage him in a one-on-one conversation, accompanied by prayers asking for divine intervention to change him into the partner you desire.

Additionally, seeking guidance from reputable counsellors who will provide valuable insights to solving this problem.

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By combining open communication, prayers, and profes­sional advice, you may discover the best approach to address the challenges in your marriage and find a path that brings fulfillment and understanding for both of you.

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Obaa Yaa

My husband is uncomfortable with me going to market 

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Dear Obaa Yaa,

My marriage is falling apart because I spent more than an hour at the market, and I honestly do not know what to do anymore.

Anytime I visit the market, my husband gives me only one hour to return home regardless of wherever I have gotten to.

This has brought disagreement between my husband and I .What started as a disagreement between my husband and I  has now become a family affair.

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I never imagined that a simple trip to the market would lead to such a painful situation in my marriage.

He has told me to pack from our matrimonial home until further notice.

Baaba, Apam

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Dear Baaba,

Do not allow family pressure to determine the future of your marriage. 

Your husband’s family may genuinely want peace, but their desire to restore the marriage should not take priority over your emotional well-being.

Marriage reconciliation should not be about getting a woman back to her husband’s house at all costs.

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You can respect your husband’s family without allowing them to dictate your decision.

On a more serious note, your husband should acknowledge the harm caused by his actions and apologise sincerely if he wrongfully sent you away. However, an apology alone is not enough to repair a marriage.

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Obaa Yaa

My landlord wants to eject me over refusal to pay 100% increment

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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 27 years, living in a single room at Lapaz. I have stayed there for three years and I always pay my rent on time.
Last month, my landlord called me and said he had doubled the rent c from GH₵600 to GH₵1,200. 

He says everything had increased so I must pay double or leave by the end of this month. I don’t have anywhere to go and I don’t have that amount. When I tried to beg him, he said if I don’t pay, he will lock my room.
Please advise me, what should I do? I am stressed.
Worried tenant.

Dear worried tenant,
I don’t know why your landlord is acting this way. He cannot just lock your room or eject you like that. In Ghana, the Rent Act mandates a landlord to give proper written notice and go through the Rent Control Department. Locking your room or throwing your things out is illegal.
You can explain to him that you cannot afford 100% at once. Propose something you can afford, maybe ask for time to adjust.
Go to the Rent Control office near you (with your old receipt and any message from your landlord). They will invite him and help you both agree on a fair increment. Usually, an increment should be reasonable, not 100% overnight.
While Rent Control is handling it, quietly start looking at other options, just in case he insists on not renewing your rent after your current rent expires.

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