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Obaa Yaa

I am in a state of dilemma

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 Dear Obaa Yaa,

My name is Owusu and I am 35- years -old while my wife is 30 years. We have been married for five years but been together for seven years. We have two children together and they are doing so well in their academics.

My company had a conference at a hotel in Kumasi and four of us from my department were selected to represent the company.

During lunch, I decided to take a stroll and enjoy the scenery around the hotel since it’s my first time there.

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As I strolled around, I was shocked to see my wife step out of a car with a young man. They started walking towards the reception of the hotel. The man placed his arms around her waist and they seemed to be enjoy­ing each other’s company.

I froze and felt bad. I wanted to shout and approach them but when I opened my mouth, no words came out and my feet were too heavy to drag. I just watched them in awe as they checked in at the reception and disappeared from my sight.

I am in my mother’s house now, I do not know how I will face her if I eventually go home. I told her my mom needs help with a few things at the house so I will lend a helping hand and also sleep over. I haven’t told anyone but my mom suspects that something is wrong.

I am down right now, my mar­riage and home seem to be coming to an end. Please what should I do?

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Sakyi, Adenta.

Dear Sakyi,

**********

I understand how you feel and I plead with you to continue to be patient with your wife.

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Please try and go home to have a word with her concerning the inci­dent you saw.

Give her the benefit of doubt to explain what she was exactly doing there at that time with the man.

I am pleading with you to give her a second chance but most important­ly, kindly inform her parents about it to talk to her.

You can seek the help of a profes­sional counselor and go for therapies with her.

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However, if you are not comfort­able staying with her, please part ways with her peacefully. You can co-parent your daughter.  

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Obaa Yaa

My sister’s boyfriend is pestering meDear Obaa Yaa,

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I am in my final year in the university. My elder sister has been very supportive after the death of our parents.

My sister has a boyfriend who visits often. Anytime he comes around, she wonders why I don’t entertain him and why I suddenly find an excuse to leave the room. She takes it as me being cold, even jealous, and it angers her more than I can even imagine.

She has no idea about what is going on behind her back. He has asked me out on several occasions and looks at me in a lustful manner.

But my problem is that I never told my sister the real reason I avoid her boyfriend. I have kept my distance, not out of hate for her or for him, but because I carry a secret that would break her heart.

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Princess, Tema.


Dear Princess,

Why are you keeping this away from your sister? As long as you continue to live under the same roof with your sister, tell her about her boyfriend’s behaviour.

Have you by any chance confided in any relative? I’ll advise you to open up to someone, at least to take the weight off your shoulder.

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Act fast before the situation exacerbates.

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Obaa Yaa

My tenant is too lazy

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Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am a young lady of 23 years who lives in a compound house around Kasoa in the Central Region. I live with my auntie.

We are not always at home because she spends most of the time at the market due to her business, and I am mostly on campus.

One sunny afternoon, I overheard some tenants talking about another who takes her bath in a basin and throws the water away. We have two big bathrooms, but just because she doesn’t want to scrub, she has refused to bathe there.

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Although she is usually not around due to her work as a nurse, it doesn’t warrant her to do as she pleases. We have spoken to the landlord about it, but she seems unconcerned. What should I do?

Beatrice, Accra


Dear Beatrice,

I am surprised that your landlord seems unperturbed.

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Have you considered having a conversation with the tenant to find out why she ignores the chores? She does not seem bothered about the kind of perception the other tenants have about her.

Why would a young lady who is a nurse and an advocate for healthy living be this lazy and unconcerned about her surroundings?

No excuse should be tolerated just because she’s a nurse and mostly not around.

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