Obaa Yaa
I am in a state of dilemma
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a graduate of the university of Cape Coast and about to start my national service this year.
Unfortunately, my problem is my inability to secure accommodation, considering where I stay and where I have been posted to.
I met a colleague male student who was a good friend of mine in the university. I told him about my problem and he has offered to share his apartment with me.
Though my friend’s apartment is really beautiful, and l need one for my National Service engagement, my fear is that I have never lived in the same apartment with any man, hence my hesitation in accepting this offer.
What should I do please?
Araba, Pokuase.
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Dear Araba,
Your case is a very dicey one which must be handled with maximum care, coupled with deep thinking.
It is normal for you to hesitate a little before accepting an offer like this.
Though this student was a good friend on campus, you are yet to know his true character if you get closer to him.
Staying in the same apartment with him is not advisable because you cannot tell what will happen when the doors are shut and the two of you are left in the same room.
He could genuinely permit you to join him in the flat and later change his mind, for which reason you must be careful.
It is only one out of 10 men who can genuinely grant you such an offer without asking for a favour in return.
If you have no option, then you should stay there at least a week or two and look for your own apartment within the shortest possible time.
The longer you stay in the same apartment, the more likely you may fall a prey to his diabolical plans.
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
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Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
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Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.
