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Obaa Yaa

She used to see a mallam

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Dear Obaa Yaa,

TWO years ago I went and consulted a mallam to help me get a hus­band. Each time, I meet a certain girl there, but we never talked, not even a simple greeting, because I did not feel comfortable to be seen at a mallam’s house.

Somehow, I started going to church and I stopped going to the mallam.

Can you imagine the shock when my elder brother recently brought this same girl home?

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But what even surprised me is that the girl does not give any indication that she knows me.

I am confused because I know my brother will never forgive me if I should be the cause of trouble between them, but I don’t want him to marry someone who got him through foul means.

Please advise me on the right course to take.

T.G, Kumasi.

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Dear T.G,

YOU should not be too quick in judging your brother’s girl. After all, you also went to the mallam before giving up to go to church. May be she also did the same thing, and met your brother through a natural way.

Whatever it is, the only way that you would be able to know anything at all is by talking to her, but you will have to be tactful about it.

Mind you, she does not owe you any explanations, because she could turn around to accuse you too.

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What is important at this stage is to try and convince your brother’s girl, is if she still goes to the mallam, to give up just like you did. You could even invite her to your church.

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Obaa Yaa

What happened

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A CEO visited his office and saw a man who was scrolling through his phone while sitting on a sofa.

The CEO asked, “What are you doing?”

The man replied, “Wasting my time until I’ll get paid.”

The CEO was furious, “What is your weekly salary!?”

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Man, “$1000”

The CEO counted $2000 and gave it to the man, “Take this money and get out! You don’t work here anymore!”

The man silently took the money and left.

CEO walked up to the reception, “By the way, who was this guy?”

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The receptionist said, “Pizza delivery”.

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Obaa Yaa

My father claims he was cursed

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I didn’t understand why my father abandoned me as a child until he appeared recently and told me my mom placed a curse on him.

I was about thirteen or fifteen, my mom took me to the front of a big house and told me that is where I belong.

I knocked the door and the man sacked me from the house to go back to my mother.

Life with my mother was very tough until God came through for me to gain a scholarship.

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Years later, I’d returned from abroad when this man walked up to me apologising.

I take care of him and provide him with everything. He needs my attention but I doubt if he will get that from me because he didn’t take care of me.

Jojo, USA.

Dear Jojo,

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This is such a heart breaking story. No child deserves to grow up wondering why a parent was absent or feeling abandoned.

If your father’s explanation is true, the responsibility for leaving you still rests with him. A curse, fear, or conflict with your mother may explain his decisions, but it does not excuse abandoning his child.

 Parents have a duty to love, protect, and remain present in their children’s lives, regardless of the problems between them.

Now that he has returned, it is reasonable to listen to what he has to say, but you do not have to accept everything without question. Ask him honest questions about why he stayed away for so many years, why he never tried to reach you, and what he hopes to achieve by reconnecting now. His willingness to take responsibility for his choices is more important than the explanation he gives.

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At the same time, try not to carry the burden of your parents’ conflict. Whatever happened between them was their issue, not yours. You were an innocent child who deserved the love and presence of both parents.

If you choose to rebuild a relationship with your father, let it happen gradually. Trust is earned through consistent actions, not just words. If you decide not to have a close relationship with him, that is also your right. Forgiveness, if you choose it, should be for your own peace of mind, not because you are obligated to overlook the pain you experienced.

Most importantly, remember that your worth was never determined by your father’s absence. His choices reflect his decisions, not your value as a person.

The past cannot be changed, but how you respond now can help you find healing and peace.

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