Obaa Yaa
Pregnant for married boyfriend
Dear ObaaYaa,
We have been good friends for a couple of years and our friendship resulted in intimate activities through which l became pregnant.
Throughout our friendship, he kept postponing my request to know his parents, though l know two of his siblings.
Over the years, he promised to marry me and crown our marriage with a wedding.
Now that l am pregnant, heartbreaking revelations are springing up each day. I am surprised to learn that he has a wife and a child in his village.
This discovery has made me to be ashamed of myself, left me confused and l am angry with this gentleman who has made my life miserable.
The predicament in which l find myself makes me feel sick because my mother warned me not to have anything to do with a married man since such relationships are fraught with problems and disgrace.
Should l abort the pregnancy or what?
Ama, Nsawam.
Dear Ama,
You should have listened to the passionate advice of your mother to chart a straight path in life but it is unfortunate you did the contrary.
Now that the harm has been done, you have to plead with your parents to forgive your refusal to listen to them.
Two wrongs do not make a right so forget about aborting the pregnancy and liaise with the gentleman to take care of you through your pregnancy till the time you are delivered of the baby.
Having gone through this turbulent period successfully, make sure you do not fall into the same problem again.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 20 and she is 19. We have been lovers for the past four months and have promised to get married to each other.
We love each other badly that one cannot leave the other for long. Our relatives know about our affair except her grandmother who will be in the country soon.
My problem is that, I doubt if the grandmother will be excited about this relationship. Her grandmother is very strict and I doubt if this relationship can be successful.
Her grandmother has been like a mother and everything to her, so her final decision may count.
We have promised each other to stay holy and clean.
Lartey,
Sunyani
Dear Lartey,
I don’t think your fears are justified if the girl’s parent do not object to your relationship with her.
What makes you think her grandmother will oppose the relationship if her parents endorse it?
Be positive about the relationship. There is no cause for alarm.
I am very happy you guys are staying holy and clean until marriage.
Both of you are student and need to be careful about any decision you take.
I believe you should try as much as possible to support each other and stay away from any negative act.
I have a girlfriend who is ‘allergic’ to me and ‘allergic’ to men in general.
Because of this, I barely touch her. I do not sit too close to her. I do not even hold her hands for long.
We have tried before. Even recently, we tried again. At first, things looked normal.
Then suddenly she lifted her hands and started scratching her back aggressively. We stopped immediately. Moments later, she ran to the bathroom and started vomiting.
She spent almost four hours there, weak, nauseous, and drained.
Watching someone you love suffer while you cannot do anything about it is painful. Is it a curse or an allergy?
Hello Christian,
What you’re describing sounds frightening and emotionally exhausting for both of you. But it is important not to jump to the idea of a curse.
Severe reactions after touch, closeness, stress, or intimacy can sometimes be linked to medical conditions, allergies, anxiety responses, trauma, or psychosomatic reactions.
The safest and most loving step is encouraging her to see qualified doctors, especially an allergist and mental health professional, so the cause can be properly understood.
Your patience already shows deep care. Do not blame yourself or search for supernatural explanations first.
Focus on support, medical guidance, emotional safety, and honest communication while protecting both her health and your relationship.
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