Obaa Yaa
I suspect she is cheating on me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
l am 27 years old and my wife is 24. We have been in friendship for six years and things went on well. I sponsored her to undergo a- four- year hair dressing apprenticeship after which l organised a grand party to mark the completion of her training.
When she started working, she was full of gratitude to me for facilitating her apprenticeship training throughout the period. She would close early from work and come to my residence to prepare meals for me.
However, l later discovered that her visits to me were not as frequent as they used to be. When l enquired, she told me that her customers increased daily and that she had a lot of work to do.
Though l was not convinced, l ignored her answer and concluded that l should give her time to change. But the way things are going it is a clear testimony that she has a lover who is taking too much of her time.
Having got the fact that she is having an affair with somebody, l am contemplating telling her to pay the money l have spent on her with interest, else she will be inflicted with a strange disease till she dies.
I think nobody will blame me if l go ahead with my plan.
Kwesi – Mankessim.
Dear Kwesi,
Take it easy and try to forget about the sacrifices and the assistance you have made to make her fully established in life.
You must remember that you have not as yet performed any rites to officially make her become your wife.
I am sure it was not easy raising funds to support her throughout her apprenticeship, yet l would appeal to you to consider all that you have done for her a charitable act which should not attract a reward in return.
I believe you are a Christian and God will not be happy if you cause her to fall sick to serve as punishment for cheating on you.
Dear Obaa Yaa
I AM a 30-year-old lady who holds a degree in Business Administration from the University of Ghana (Legon). I am married to a very wealthy man who provides me with everything I need.
My problem, however, is that my husband doesn’t want me to work. His explanation is that I am too beautiful, and for that matter, he is scared to lose me. His explanation doesn’t make sense, and I am very angry about his decision.
Secondly, the children are too young, and he is also not ready to employ a nanny, which makes me feel that I am a prisoner. This is a serious problem, and if I am not careful, it will affect my health since I am always indoors. I need your view on this, Obaa Yaa.
—Tina, Ada
Dear Tina
I UNDERSTAND where you are coming from because you want to work and explore. In this era, even if your husband is a billionaire, you need to work to make your own money in case any misfortune happens.
He pays me GH₵5,000 every month for being a housewife, so he doesn’t see the need for me to stress myself about work. I am not happy with this sort of life because, as a woman, it is not everything that I can ask from him. This has been my headache for some time now. Initially, I didn’t see it as a problem, but I realised that in the 21st century, being an independent woman is the best.
For close to five years, I have virtually been under house arrest; I am getting the feeling along the line that when only one person shoulders all costs at home, it makes the other person feel useless.
You need to have a heart-to-heart talk with your husband. Tell him that even if he doesn’t want you to work for any company, he should set up a business for you to manage to reduce the boredom in your life. I hope that if you subtly put this point across, he will change his mind and get you something to do.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
MY fiancé is a journalist with one of the reputable media houses in Ghana.
Plans are far advanced for us to tie the knot but my worry is that he’s always busy and comes home late every evening when I am in bed.
By the nature of his work and schedule, as soon as he comes home, he takes his bath and supper. The next thing is to sleep without spending time with me.
He has no holiday. On Sundays, he goes again to work after church service. I am beginning to entertain some fears that things will get worse when we get married.
I am the type who like to be pampered but my fiancé is not pampering me.
Please advise me to make an informed decision before it becomes too late.
Paulina,
Dodowa.
Dear Paulina,
THERE are no specified working hours for journalists. In short, they are always on the move.
That is why it appears they cannot be good husbands.
And if you want a man who will be at home and pamper you, then a journalist might not suit that purpose, unless he is on leave.
However, I wouldn’t discourage you. Journalists are very interesting people who learn a lot and can help you to widen your outlook.
Don’t look at the romantic aspect of it only; consider the future of the relationship, your self-development and the future of your children. I wish you all the best.
