Obaa Yaa
My mother is bitter
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My elder sister and her boyfriend want to settle down in September but there is some confusion over who will give out the marriage list. My mother thinks my father does not deserve that honour because he had abandoned us for the past 15 years.
The two-bedroom self-contained house in which we live belongs to my father. He owns other houses also which my mother has rented out. My mother is threatening to disown my sister if she involves our father in the marriage arrangements.
Our father has apologised to us and we have forgiven him but I do not know why mom is still bitter. We have tried to convince her but she will not listen to us. What do we do?
Mabel, Kasoa.
Dear Mabel,
Irrespective of whatever happened in the past, your father still has a place in the marriage ceremony. Once he is alive, he has to take the bride price and bless the marriage. However, your mother may be bitter because she might have endured a lot of challenges in the last 15 years when your father was ‘absent’.
Engage your mother once again and help her to forgive your father so they both can support the marriage ceremony. You and your siblings can as well talk to elders in your family to talk to your mother. Hopefully, things will work out because your father’s blessing is important in the marriage. But if all possible resolutions fail, respect your mother’s decision.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 35year –old-lady married to a banker. I am a housewife. I am fair in complexion. I got my left hand tattooed sometime last year. I have never had my peace with my husband because he strongly abhors.
In my attempt to get it erased, I have caused a big scar on my hand which has worsened the situation. Sometime ago, your esteemed paper carried a story about how permanent tattoo can be cleared and a location.
May I know whether it is possible to get the scar and tattoo erased, and how much it would cost.
Worried housewife, Prampram.
Dear housewife,
Since I have no idea how wide and deep the scar and tattoo are, it would be difficult for me to have a meaningful discussion with the specialists at the unit.
I suggest that the next time you visit Accra, you pay a visit to any skincare unit and ask what help they can offer.
But until then, do not apply any self-medication. You may also ask your doctor to advise you as if there is any way out for a surgery. All the best.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Ever since we got married, two years ago, my husband seldom wears his wedding ring except on occasion such as church service, funerals, outdooring and other social gatherings.
For the rest of the week, he goes to work without it. The excuse he gives is that whether he wears the ring to work or not, he is by law married to me.
But I beg to differ. I suspect there is more to it than what he told me. I need your advice on this.
Eno, Ashiaman.
Dear Eno,
Some men don’t like wearing rings; others enjoy it. It is just like how some women like wearing jewellery or large earing while others would rather do away with them.
The fact, however, is that a man can misbehave even when he wears it or not because there are ladies who wouldn’t mind with the ring on.
When he gets back home, he would wear it again. What difference does it make if he doesn’t wear it all?
