Obaa Yaa
She is unwilling to break up with me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 35 years old married man with two children, but two years ago, I befriended a 25-year-old lady.
Before we started our friendship, I explained to her that I was married but she said she was not bothered.
She is very kind, open-minded and possesses the quality every man would look for in a lady.
Our relationship has developed to the extent that she feels lonely and uneasy if she does not see me after a couple of days.
When I suggested to her recently that we should end our relationship because I have discovered that I was wasting her time, she burst in uncontrollable tears.
According to her, she cannot stay without me and that she loves me because of the way I treat her, adding that she always feels comfortable in my arms. She has threatened that if I press further to leave her she would take her life.
Unfortunately, I am not financially sound to cater for two wives.
Please what step should I take?
Kwame, Accra.
Dear Kwame,
Sometimes people find it extremely difficult to comprehend issues pertaining to love.
You are frank in putting across your problem for a solution which needs a gradual approach in dealing with it. Since the lady has threatened to take her life, you must treat this information with great caution and the seriousness that it deserves.
Constant dialogue and the desire to calm down tempers will gradually solve the problem and she will take her mind off you.
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
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Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
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Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.
