Obaa Yaa
Can women be trusted?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young man who is trying to find my true bearing in life and equally battling with a relationship issue.
I am of the view that despite the challenges that confront man, life must be lived to its fullest. I have been single for the past six years after my first girlfriend broke my heart.
Though I did all I could to make her feel what true happiness was, she succeeded in breaking my heart by leaving me for a rich man in our community.
The trust I had in my lady coupled with the pain I endured as a result of the break up has made it impossible for me to propose to another lady.
My disappointment is gradually giving way since I am a bit skeptical about entering a new relationship due to my past experience.
I am not enthused about the ladies around me who appear to be loving because I feel they could also treat me like my previous lover.
Please how do I know if one of these ladies would be the right person to marry?
Newton, Spintex-Accra.
Dear Newton,
I wish to assure you that women can be trusted and that you cannot judge all women by the character of one woman.
You must stop crying over spilt milk now that your former lady has a lover. Additionally, your action is being guided by the adage which says “Once bitten twice shy.”
It is unfortunate that your past experience in a relationship is having a serious effect on your imagination and this is preventing you from taking the next step in your relationship.
Your first experience should not cloud your imagination about the positive side of life. However, you must take inspiration from another adage which says “If you fail to take risk in life, you cannot win a war.”
You ought to consider taking another risk by going into a relationship, and since all the hands are not equal, you may be surprised to meet a lady with a different character and there is the possibility that the two of you will be compatible and end up becoming a successful couple.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My marriage is falling apart because I spent more than an hour at the market, and I honestly do not know what to do anymore.
Anytime I visit the market, my husband gives me only one hour to return home regardless of wherever I have gotten to.
This has brought disagreement between my husband and I .What started as a disagreement between my husband and I has now become a family affair.
I never imagined that a simple trip to the market would lead to such a painful situation in my marriage.
He has told me to pack from our matrimonial home until further notice.
Baaba, Apam
Dear Baaba,
Do not allow family pressure to determine the future of your marriage.
Your husband’s family may genuinely want peace, but their desire to restore the marriage should not take priority over your emotional well-being.
Marriage reconciliation should not be about getting a woman back to her husband’s house at all costs.
You can respect your husband’s family without allowing them to dictate your decision.
On a more serious note, your husband should acknowledge the harm caused by his actions and apologise sincerely if he wrongfully sent you away. However, an apology alone is not enough to repair a marriage.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 27 years, living in a single room at Lapaz. I have stayed there for three years and I always pay my rent on time.
Last month, my landlord called me and said he had doubled the rent c from GH₵600 to GH₵1,200.
He says everything had increased so I must pay double or leave by the end of this month. I don’t have anywhere to go and I don’t have that amount. When I tried to beg him, he said if I don’t pay, he will lock my room.
Please advise me, what should I do? I am stressed.
Worried tenant.
Dear worried tenant,
I don’t know why your landlord is acting this way. He cannot just lock your room or eject you like that. In Ghana, the Rent Act mandates a landlord to give proper written notice and go through the Rent Control Department. Locking your room or throwing your things out is illegal.
You can explain to him that you cannot afford 100% at once. Propose something you can afford, maybe ask for time to adjust.
Go to the Rent Control office near you (with your old receipt and any message from your landlord). They will invite him and help you both agree on a fair increment. Usually, an increment should be reasonable, not 100% overnight.
While Rent Control is handling it, quietly start looking at other options, just in case he insists on not renewing your rent after your current rent expires.
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