Features
Resilience is a choice
The other day I saw a corn springing out of the overhead at Mallam at the end of George Walker Bush Highway in Accra. Whenever we see a plant or a wildflower pushing through a crack in concrete, we marvel at its determination to thrive. A seed landed in a difficult spot, but it had the tenacity to grow and bloom anyway.
We feel the same rush of admiration for trees that spring up after a devastating fire. When everything seemed ruined, somehow nature won, and life continued.
Many of us are like those determined seeds, those persistent trees. We’ve found ourselves in a difficult spot, or we’ve experienced a devastating tragedy: financial or health losses, death of loved ones, lost opportunities. Can we possibly grow and bloom in such conditions?
Religious leader, Dieter F. Uchtdorf, said, “It is your reaction to adversity, not the adversity itself that determines how your life’s story will develop”.
Our attitudes really can make all the difference. A woman who lost her restaurant during the pandemic immediately set up a takeout company. She made ends meet until she finally grew it into a catering business. She worked hard and refused to give up, and her determination paid off.
A couple also survived decades of overwhelming challenges. They joked that if they didn’t have bad luck, they’d have no luck at all! But through it all; health problems, heartache, even the loss of several children, they have shown traits of survivors. They tried to look for the positive in every situation. They thought about others more than themselves. They turned to God for peace and comfort. And they have learnt to serenely accept that there were certain things they simply could not change.
And we all know people whose early childhood seemed to have set them up for failure, yet they defied the odds and joyfully built a happy, successful life. In their adversities, they learned to forgive, to take responsibility for their own growth, and to be resilient. As the expression goes, instead of cursing the rain, they built a boat.
Among the many things we can’t choose about our life, we can always choose our goals, our work ethics, and our attitudes. Even setbacks, though we’d never choose them, can be blessings when they lead us to explore other avenues. Most of the time, we are grateful for the better jobs we landed after we were laid off, or the compassion we felt towards the grief-stricken after our own period of grieving.
Helen Keller is a remarkable example of someone who overcame the incredible disadvantages of being both blind and deaf. She did not only learned to sign and speak, she became a worldwide inspirational leader also. From her unique perspective, she observed, “Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it”
We all have our share of difficulty and tragedy in life. Some of us, in fact, seemed to have had more than our share. And then there are people who somehow, against all odds, survive multiple seemingly impossible situations.
Challenges happen for all kinds of reasons. Sometimes they are the consequences of our own actions. Other times we are the victims of the poor choices of others. But most of the time, heartaches and adversities come upon us randomly—accidents, illnesses, misfortune. No one is to blame; they just happen.
Regardless of their sources, such hardship can either make us bitter, or in some cases better. What makes the difference? Why do some people become angry and resentful after experiencing adversity, while others become more accepting, even forgiving? Of course, we can’t see the inside of other people’s hearts, or pass judgement on their life journey. But experts have observed that resilient people, “survivors,” share certain traits: they are optimistic, selfless, and spiritual, and they accept what can’t be changed.
In a sense, each of us is a survivor. We all have these traits inside of us to one degree or another. We may not know when the next challenge will come, but the best way to prepare to survive whatever life brings is to think positively, turn outward in selflessness, deepen our relationship with God, and learn to accept what can’t be changed. In other words, we can do our best to develop the traits of a survivor.
By Samuel Enos Eghan
Email: samueleghan@gmail.com
On Sunday, October 11, 2026, it was the turn of Ghanaian Catholics in Finland to lead the singing in the church service of the African Catholic Chaplaincy in Finland (ACCF).
It was indeed a spirit-filled feeling for worshippers present. And for the Ghanaian migrants, the occasion also brought back to them memories of church services in their home country, Ghana.
The ACCF has a roster for each country/community to sing from time to time. Next Sunday will be the turn of the Nigerian community. Other communities that usually sing are the Kenyan/Tanzanian community, the Cameroonian, the Ugandan, group, etc.
A powerful religious experience
The mass services of the Chaplaincy usually give a powerful religious experience and a display of cultural diversity, especially in occasions such as when the Bishop of Helsinki, Bishop Raimo Goyarrola, celebrated mass with the Chaplaincy on Pentecost Day, May 24, 2026.
There was a similar time of spiritual joy last month (September 27, 2026) when Emeritus Bishop Teemu Sippo, former Bishop of Helsinki, visited the Chaplaincy. Bishop Teemu was the main celebrant, assisted by the Chaplain, Reverend Father Thomas Otieno.
Last Sunday, Reverend Father Bernard Sor, a Ghanaian Catholic priest based in Austria, was the main celebrant in the mass service where he performed a rite of baptism. Fr Bernard had celebrated mass a few months ago when he visited his sister and her husband in Helsinki. 
All these well-attended religious occasions indeed leave lasting memories. The homilies (peaching) by the priests usually emphasize religious tenets such as the importance of loving and serving God in truth, existing in peace with our fellow humans to promote unity in diversity, etc.
Unity in diversity and a colourful display of cultures
The African Chaplaincy church services usually produce impressive displays of diverse cultures from different parts of Africa and elsewhere. The events are often spiced by rich cultural displays of dances and colourful attires which are a delight to watch.
On special occasions, members of the Ghanaian Catholic community, in their gay and colourful kente attire and with adowa dance and music, usually lead the procession into the church. Other communities such as the Cameroonian, Nigerian, Kenyan and Tanzanian as well as Sudanese/South Sudanese groups also put up well-choreographed performances from their cultures.
The African Catholic Chaplaincy in Finland
The African Chaplaincy was founded on June 4, 2017, which was a Pentecost Sunday, in a Pontifical High Mass celebrated by Monsignor Emeritus Sippo S.C.I., the then Bishop of Helsinki, at the St. Mary’s Catholic Parish Church in Helsinki.
The Chaplaincy was created by Bishop Teemu in collaboration with the Diocesan body when they detected a great flocking of African immigrants to Finland, the majority of whom were Catholics. This was to give the immigrants a possibility to integrate into the Finnish society by worshiping as Catholics and in their African cultural identity.
The responsibility of the Chaplaincy was given by Bishop Teemu to Father Dr Leonard Wobilla Shwei, who is thus the first Chaplain and ably led the Chaplaincy. He was succeeded a few years ago by Father Thomas Otieno, who continues to move the Chaplaincy forward. Thank you!
GHANA MATTERS column appears fortnightly. Written in simple, layman’s terms, it concentrates on matters about Ghana and beyond. It focuses on everyday life issues relating to the social, cultural, economic, religious, political, health, sports, youth, gender, etc. It strives to remind us all that Ghana comes first. The column also takes a candid look at the meanings and repercussions of our actions, especially those things we take for granted or even ignore. There are key Ghanaian values we should uphold rather than disregard with impunity. We should not overlook the obvious. We need to search for the hidden or deeply embedded values and try to project them.
With Dr Perpetual Crentsil
SKIP THE QUEUE, TAP THE NEWS
You can now read the Ghanaian Times and The Spectator newspapers from the comfort of your device via TimesNewsPlus.
Join our WhatsApp Channel: https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VbBElzjInlqHhl1aTU27
She did not find out he was cheating. She found out he was drowning.
It was two weeks after their beautiful wedding. The jollof was still in the fridge. A loan officer called her number-not his-and politely asked, “Madam, please tell your husband to pay his overdue loan. We have been calling him.”
That was how she discovered her new husband had entered their marriage with a hidden debt of over GH¢ 40,000. No cheating. No other woman. Just a financial secret.
And that is how many Ghanaian marriages begin to die. Not with a shout, but with a secret alert on a phone.
We prepare for the wedding. We do not prepare for the wallet.
What is money honesty?
Let me define it simply. Money honesty is not that you both earn the same. It is that you both know the same. It is the ability to sit down and say without fear:
“This is how much I earn.”
“This is how much I owe.”
“This is how I was raised to see money.”
“This is what scares me about money.”
Financial transparency is not about control. It is about clarity. You cannot build trust on top of secrets.
Many couples tell me, “Counsellor, we love each other, love will handle money.” I always answer, “Love is the car, but money honesty is the fuel. Love without honesty cannot move.”
How To Buy Your Marriage Insurance Today – My 5-Step Protocol
If you are engaged, newly married, or even 20 years in marriage, you can still fix this. At Counsellor Prince & Associates Consult—CPAC, this is what I give couples:
Step 1: The 90-Minute Money Naked Session.
No phones, no blame. Each partner writes down on paper: Monthly income, monthly debts, monthly family obligations, savings, and your biggest money fear. Then you exchange papers. Read it. Don’t react for 24 hours. Just absorb.
Step 2: Create OUR Money, YOUR Money, My Money.
You need three pots. OUR money for rent, food, school fees, utilities, properties, and the like— joint contribution. YOUR money and MY money—a small agreed allowance no one questions. This stops the feeling of being controlled.
Step 3: The No-Secret Debt Rule.
Agree from today: No new loan, no new hire purchase, no new family financial commitment above GHS 500 without telling each other first. Not permission, but information.
Step 4: Talk About Your Money Personality.
Are you a Spender or a Saver? Are you Risky or Safe? Most Ghanaian marriages are a Spender married to a Saver. Neither is wrong. But if you don’t understand your partner’s personality, you will call his saving “stinginess” and her spending “wastefulness.”
Step 5: Do a Monthly 30-Minute Money Date
Not an argument date. Light, with tea. “How did we do this month? What worried you? What should we plan for next month?” Couples who do this divorce far less.
My Final Word
Before you say “I Do” at the altar, have pre-marital counselling and also have the money talk on the sofa.
Ask your partner:
“If I lost my job today, how long can we survive?”
“What debt are you bringing into this marriage?”
“How much do you send to your family monthly and will that continue?”
If he or she gets angry that you asked, don’t get married yet. A person who is angry about accountability will be abusive about money.
Marriage insurance is not bought at Star Assurance or Enterprise. It is bought in honest conversations when no one is watching.
The wedding costs one day. The marriage costs a lifetime. Don’t enter a lifetime contract and covenant with hidden costs.
You can still insure your marriage today.
Source:
Counselor Prince Offei, CPAC’s founder, is a leading Mental Health Professional, Marriage Counsellor, Author, ADR Expert/Arbitrator, and Spectator Newspaper Columnist. He writes on relationships, marriage, parenting, special needs support, and their connection to mental health. For therapy, counselling, or enquiries, contact Counselor Prince & Associates Consult (CPAC) in Accra on 0559850604 / 0551428486.
SKIP THE QUEUE, TAP THE NEWS
You can now read the Ghanaian Times and The Spectator newspapers from the comfort of your device via TimesNewsPlus.
Join our WhatsApp Channel: https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VbBElzjInlqHhl1aTU27
