Obaa Yaa
I am hurt by his actions
Dear Obaa Yaa,
As teenagers, we attended the same Senior High School and became close friends after some years.
Having gotten satisfied with the hope that we could spend our lives as a lovely couple, we planned to tie the knot.
Unfortunately, l lost my father through a fatal motor accident and this had affected our scheduled wedding.
We had no choice but to reschedule our wedding to enable me to concentrate on my father’s funeral.
He stood by me during our period of grief through to the burial of my late father.
During the period, l discovered that my fiancé had changed since he did not have time for me as he used to.
When l complained about change in his attitude, he told me that he wanted me to relax after l was done with my father’s funeral.
At the time the dust had settled for us to get back to serious business, my fiancé had changed and did not have time for me again.
The change in attitude gave me the premonition that there was something bad going on in our relationship.
Three weeks ago, l deduced from his statement that we could not live as a couple in the future.
However, l tried to conceal my anger and prayed that things should change.
A few weeks later, he disclosed to me that he was no longer interested in the relationship because his mother was against it.
l was embarrassed and planned never to accept proposal from any gentleman in life.
Should l go by my decision?
Tina, Takoradi.
Dear Tina,
l feel sorry that but for the demise of your father, your scheduled marriage with this gentleman could have taken place.
It is unfortunate that your relationship has ended this way.
l can envisage the pains you are experiencing now. Take heart and brace up for a better future because you cannot understand God’s plan for you. This marriage could have ended on a bad note.
Though l cannot tell how old you are, l must advise you not to shut your doors to any gentleman who may express the interest to marry you in the future.
You are yet to meet your Mr right.
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
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Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
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Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.
