Obaa Yaa

I Want to Give Love a Chance

Published

4 months ago

December 13, 2025

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I’m a lady in my late 30s who wants to give love a second chance, despite all the pain and scars love has caused me.

Tony was just a new staff my company recruited to work in my department. We became friends, and our friendship became stronger when we realised we were both of the same tribe. We fell madly in love, and dating each other was the best option. I got pregnant and less than a month later, we did our traditional wedding and later signed in court.

I found out that my husband, Tony, had a wife and a child in the United Kingdom (UK) when I was eight months pregnant and five months married. What should I do?

Patricia, North Kaneshie

My dear Patricia,

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It takes a lot of courage to open up about your pain. It sounds like you’ve been through a really tough experience with Tony.

First, let’s acknowledge your strength and resilience. You’ve been through a lot, and you’re still standing. That says a lot about your character.

It sounds like Tony presented himself as a good man, and you believed him. You connected well and he seemed to have good family values, but it turns out he was hiding a big secret.

My advice to you is to take time to process your emotions. It’s okay to feel angry, hurt, and confused, but allow yourself to grieve the loss of the relationship and the future you thought you had.

You might want to consider seeking support from loved ones, a therapist, or a support group. Talking through your feelings can really help.

In terms of the next steps, you may consider getting legal advice to understand your rights and options. As a pregnant woman, you have certain rights, and it’s essential to prioritise your well-being and the baby’s well-being.

Obaa Yaa

My wife is living with another man

Published

17 hours ago

April 25, 2026

WeeklySpectator

Dear Obaa Yaa,

Due to a small misunderstanding, my wife has left her matrimonial home and had gone to stay with my in-laws. I have been invited by them to come for the matter to be settled.

However, I have been reliably informed that my wife and my three-year-old son are currently staying with a man.

This is so annoying, I want to call in the police to arrest and charge this man for abduction.

Philip,

Accra.

Dear Philip,

You don’t have a problem with this man. You have a problem with your wife.

Also, do not rely on hearsay to act. I suggest you go to your In-laws to ask of your wife and listen to what they have to say.

Go along with a mature member of your family and discuss the issue.

If it is just a ‘small misunderstanding’ as you say then let your attitude lead to reconciliation.

If it is true that your wife is living with a man and her parents endorse it then that is another matter.

Your family must meet her family squarely on the matter to decide whether your marriage to their daughter is over or not.

But don’t go for a divorce no matter how complicated things may turn out to be. You owe your child his happiness. The police is a last resort.

Obaa Yaa

I cannot wait for him

Published

17 hours ago

April 25, 2026

WeeklySpectator

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am a girl of 25 years. My fiancé is 30 years. We met about three years ago when my fiancé was in training college. The plan was to get married after his schooling so we started making initial preparations towards that.

Now, my fiancé has started working in readiness to carry on with the engagement but his father says he should hold on because he started work not long ago.

His father doesn’t object to our relationship but he insists that my fiancé should further his education at the University before the engagement.

He warned, however, that if we insist on carrying out with the engagement, then he should be counted out. He would have nothing to do with his son again.

My fiancé also thinks marriage without the consent of the father can be disastrous because the Bible even talks about honouring one’s parents.

Obaa Yaa, my problem is that I cannot wait any longer. I feel like walking out of the relationship because my fiancé is being dictated to by the father. Please what should I do.

Ekua,

Obom.

Dear Ekua,

Probably your fiancé’s father is concerned about a better future for the two of you since marriage can be financially demanding.

What you are calling ‘engagement’ is customary marriage.

I believe you need to accept your boyfriend’s father’s advice and also use the opportunity to either further your education or be financially stable.

It is good to be married but it is better both partners are financially stable so that both of you will not be financially or emotionally drained in the marriage.

Real security is when you and your partner have no ulterior motive for marrying each other but for the sake of mutual love and respect which is based on the fear of God.