Obaa Yaa

I don’t love my wife anymore

Published

5 months ago

November 29, 2025

WeeklySpectator

Dear Obaa Yaa,

WE have been married for three years with no child. We have been living together for about five years now.

For eight months, we had a lot of quarrels caused by her. I complained to her parents when they came for a visit.

I later left them in the house for an evening church service around 7pm. Upon my return after about 9:30pm, she was not in the house and neither were her parents. I opened the door and found out that she had left with all her belongings.

I did not go to look for her. She also did not come back that day. She came back on the fourth day to plead for forgiveness.

But the truth is that I have lost interest in her and the relationship, so her return after four days to seek forgiveness meant nothing to me. I don’t love her again. What should I do?
Yawson, Swedru.

Dear Yawson,

I DON’T understand why your wife decided to stay out for almost four days. My second headache is why her parents allowed her to pack out of her matrimonial home without your consent.

I understand your anger, but I think you must listen to her first; know where she went for four days and what informed the decision before arriving at a final verdict on her.

If you investigate and find out that she didn’t go anywhere to ‘misbehave,’ but just went away out of anger only to realise she was wrong, then she is worth forgiving. To err is human, to forgive is divine.

In your letter you said you do not love her again. Are you sure about that? Perhaps you are fuming with anger now, but when your anger abates, you’ll be in a better position to assess the situation.

Obaa Yaa

My wife is living with another man

Published

17 hours ago

April 25, 2026

WeeklySpectator

Dear Obaa Yaa,

Due to a small misunderstanding, my wife has left her matrimonial home and had gone to stay with my in-laws. I have been invited by them to come for the matter to be settled.

However, I have been reliably informed that my wife and my three-year-old son are currently staying with a man.

This is so annoying, I want to call in the police to arrest and charge this man for abduction.

Philip,

Accra.

Dear Philip,

You don’t have a problem with this man. You have a problem with your wife.

Also, do not rely on hearsay to act. I suggest you go to your In-laws to ask of your wife and listen to what they have to say.

Go along with a mature member of your family and discuss the issue.

If it is just a ‘small misunderstanding’ as you say then let your attitude lead to reconciliation.

If it is true that your wife is living with a man and her parents endorse it then that is another matter.

Your family must meet her family squarely on the matter to decide whether your marriage to their daughter is over or not.

But don’t go for a divorce no matter how complicated things may turn out to be. You owe your child his happiness. The police is a last resort.

Obaa Yaa

I cannot wait for him

Published

17 hours ago

April 25, 2026

WeeklySpectator

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am a girl of 25 years. My fiancé is 30 years. We met about three years ago when my fiancé was in training college. The plan was to get married after his schooling so we started making initial preparations towards that.

Now, my fiancé has started working in readiness to carry on with the engagement but his father says he should hold on because he started work not long ago.

His father doesn’t object to our relationship but he insists that my fiancé should further his education at the University before the engagement.

He warned, however, that if we insist on carrying out with the engagement, then he should be counted out. He would have nothing to do with his son again.

My fiancé also thinks marriage without the consent of the father can be disastrous because the Bible even talks about honouring one’s parents.

Obaa Yaa, my problem is that I cannot wait any longer. I feel like walking out of the relationship because my fiancé is being dictated to by the father. Please what should I do.

Ekua,

Obom.

Dear Ekua,

Probably your fiancé’s father is concerned about a better future for the two of you since marriage can be financially demanding.

What you are calling ‘engagement’ is customary marriage.

I believe you need to accept your boyfriend’s father’s advice and also use the opportunity to either further your education or be financially stable.

It is good to be married but it is better both partners are financially stable so that both of you will not be financially or emotionally drained in the marriage.

Real security is when you and your partner have no ulterior motive for marrying each other but for the sake of mutual love and respect which is based on the fear of God.