Obaa Yaa
He has broken my heart
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a Level 300 student in the university and started a relationship with a gentleman in October last year.
I was deeply involved with him to the extent that I thought I had found the ideal man I had prayed for and was not prepared to listen to anyone but was ready to spend the rest of my life with him.
This young man gave me the assurance that he was everything I needed in a relationship and was prepared to marry me.
Before reaching this decision, he introduced me to a couple of friends that I was the one he was going to marry and promised to take me to his parents. This gave me the impression that I was the only person in his life and that he will do everything to marry me.
Early this year, there were signs that our union was not on a sound footing because he received series of calls from a particular lady but he declined to pick the calls. Later he picked and promised to call the person later. This confirmed my fears that there was something wrong with our relationship.
My initial enquiries proved that he had somebody but he denied when I questioned him. It became clear that the nice bond of love that we claimed to have established was a stock pile of deceit.
I had the shock of my life when a close friend of his confirmed my fears that my lover has a two-year-old child.
Things became worse before April and we finally had to break up in May.
I never cheated on him but I love this guy and did everything to make him happy. What should I do now since my heart is broken?
Ama, Accra.
Dear Ama,
It is unfortunate that this gentleman has given you the false hope that he was going to marry you and the promise made you to put your trust in him.
Now that you know his character do not give him the opportunity to deceive you that it was a mistake.
Remember that this guy cannot be trusted because he has a child and was only making fun of you.
Thank God that the secret surrounding this gentleman has been revealed and you now know your stand.
Take heart and listen to what your conscience tells you. Re-organise your life and with time, you will definitely get your partner who will be faithful and love you. .
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My marriage is falling apart because I spent more than an hour at the market, and I honestly do not know what to do anymore.
Anytime I visit the market, my husband gives me only one hour to return home regardless of wherever I have gotten to.
This has brought disagreement between my husband and I .What started as a disagreement between my husband and I has now become a family affair.
I never imagined that a simple trip to the market would lead to such a painful situation in my marriage.
He has told me to pack from our matrimonial home until further notice.
Baaba, Apam
Dear Baaba,
Do not allow family pressure to determine the future of your marriage.
Your husband’s family may genuinely want peace, but their desire to restore the marriage should not take priority over your emotional well-being.
Marriage reconciliation should not be about getting a woman back to her husband’s house at all costs.
You can respect your husband’s family without allowing them to dictate your decision.
On a more serious note, your husband should acknowledge the harm caused by his actions and apologise sincerely if he wrongfully sent you away. However, an apology alone is not enough to repair a marriage.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 27 years, living in a single room at Lapaz. I have stayed there for three years and I always pay my rent on time.
Last month, my landlord called me and said he had doubled the rent c from GH₵600 to GH₵1,200.
He says everything had increased so I must pay double or leave by the end of this month. I don’t have anywhere to go and I don’t have that amount. When I tried to beg him, he said if I don’t pay, he will lock my room.
Please advise me, what should I do? I am stressed.
Worried tenant.
Dear worried tenant,
I don’t know why your landlord is acting this way. He cannot just lock your room or eject you like that. In Ghana, the Rent Act mandates a landlord to give proper written notice and go through the Rent Control Department. Locking your room or throwing your things out is illegal.
You can explain to him that you cannot afford 100% at once. Propose something you can afford, maybe ask for time to adjust.
Go to the Rent Control office near you (with your old receipt and any message from your landlord). They will invite him and help you both agree on a fair increment. Usually, an increment should be reasonable, not 100% overnight.
While Rent Control is handling it, quietly start looking at other options, just in case he insists on not renewing your rent after your current rent expires.
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