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Girls@war on MTN

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If you are a male, elderly and use an MTN number prefixed with 024-4, you are likely to identify with my concerns in my epistle for today. However, if you are not on the social media WhatsApp platform, you will miss the fun. But, truth be told, it is not funny at all.

As a journalist I get to scour social media platforms for news gossips, though not all things on these platforms are edifying. My favourite is Facebook where I endeavour to engage ‘friends’ in intellectual discourse. I limit myself to just a few categories. I do not accept ‘friendship’ from people who do not post their photograph profiles and those who use unreal names for identity.

I am quick to ‘unfriend’ people whose requests I accept yet do not communicate with me. I have noticed people with up to 46,000 friends on Facebook and wonder why it is so. I do not know if they present them as part of their curriculum vitae (CV). I have shut down my Instagram account as I consider it a ‘madhouse’ and follow no one on Twitter.

Now, since the beginning of this year, I have been assailed by as many as 18 girls on Whatsapp; girls who are not on my contact list. They post profile pictures that qualify them for beauty contests any day.

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Their modus operandi is a simple ‘Hi…’ When you respond in like manner, she introduces herself and tells you where she lives, then proceeds to ask your name. If you do not respond to the initial ‘hi’ many of them let go. Some wait for a couple of days and reconnect.

Not all their identities are captured by the Truecaller app, but I have devised a way to get their identities. In all cases, save one, they turn up to be who they claim they are. The one exception was one who claimed to be a student at the Nursing Training School in Koforidua and said she wanted a relationship with me but was short of funds to pay her fees. She needed my help. I told her my niece taught at that school so I would get to her through my relative. All her response to this was “Fool,” and deleted our chat immediately thereafter.

Anytime I ask how they got my contact, their answer mostly is that they get it from WhatsApp. I give them the benefit of the doubt, but what runs through is their lack of communication skills. How are you? I’m a beautician. I’m fine, you? These are the only way they converse.

Then after a week or two, they ask you to send them money to pay medical bills for their ailing mother; never their father. I tell them in plain words that I am unable to help, first, because I do not know who they are, whether their demand is genuine and go on to ask if they look for people on Whatsapp to help their ailing relatives.

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One, who claimed to be a “fashion and designer,” (whatever that means) living in Nzema, wanted to visit me in Accra after saying ‘hi…’ for four days and wanted me to send her GHc500 for transport. Seeing through this, I asked her to find her way to the capital and I would pay her transport fare. That was the last I heard from her.

I own multiple numbers from all the Telcos, but why these girls only target MTN baffles me. Even with MTN, I have prefixes 024-2, 054 and 055, but it is only the 024-4 they contact me on in spite of the fact that all the others are also on Whatsapp. Or am I the only one these girls take a fancy to?

These are really girls at war. A bold one asked to be my friend on Facebook. Seeing she was friends with many people from my family, church and friends, I accepted her friendship. Her profile painted a picture of someone who graduated from the University of Ghana, lives somewhere in the capital and is into beauty therapy.

A couple of months later, she asked if I was on Whatsapp. I gave her one of my numbers. She asked what I did and I asked her to check my profile on LinkedIn, Google or Facebook. I asked if she wanted my CV. She did not know what a CV was. That was proof she never went to Legon.

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One morning, she sent the usual greetings and, out of the blue came, “When can I make love with U?” I almost felt giddy. Then I called my brother in Koforidua to find out about this girl. He said he had many friends on Facebook he hardly communicated with, adding he was rarely on that platform lately. My other friends could not remember her. My brother cautioned me against a possible blackmail.

Later, my response to her was, “Really? But we hardly know each other and U don’t know if I’m married or not. Secondly, I’ve seen that U are friends with two of my brothers on Facebook and very good friends of mine too. And I don’t have relationships without telling my siblings bcoz of my position in society, so I’m at a loss as to how this can work out.” Unfazed by my response, she shot back that she had feelings for me.

How girls can spray their pheromones all over social media befuddles the mind. When I returned to check her out on Facebook, it turned out that she has many accounts to her name, and her photographs are on full display.And all these girls are below 30, far younger than my youngest daughter who turns 36 today.

I don’t know if the economic situation in the landis what drives these girls into this rather aggressive mode of soliciting sustenance or they are just there to fleece lascivious or lecherous men who might be game for their escapades. 

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A lady friend gave me a perspective on this.  She tells me that the young men of their generation, to start with, are not as romantic as the elderly ones. Next, all they think of is sex, sex and more sex. To them sex is coterminous with love; nothing more, nothing less. She adds that young women are looking for love and affection and the elderly men fit the bill.

Why then do these girls make financial demands? My friend did not have a ready answer to this, but surmised that some might be driven first by financial considerations. “They are likely in the category of desperados who want money at any cost,” she quipped.

But there is one who claims she wants an elderly, but experienced, man to take her under his wings and teach her what life is all about. She says she is ready to introduce her ‘mentor’ to her family in case doubts arise. As espoused by Rev. Dr. F. K. Fiawoo, a pet snake may appear harmless in its infancy, “…but the tendency to prey upon man grows in proportion. And soon you have at home a ferocious animal with all elements of atrocity fully developed.”

One other thing I do is to give them the Whatsapp number of a fund administrator. They are asked to provide verifiable details. For example, which hospital the ailing relative is, name of the physician, contact of the health facility etc. None has so far provided any details.

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Personally, I lay no claim to be tech savvy but is there a way our Telcos can protect their clients from unsolicited ‘attacks’ from people not on their contact list? Or can Whatsapp protect us from these spams? But then, why do these girls target only MTN users?

I know I have not seen the last of these girls. Indeed, they are girls at war, but I am ready for them.

Writer’s email address: akofa45@yahoo.com

By Dr. Akofa K. Segbefia

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Traditional values an option for anti-corruption drive — (Part 1)

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One of the issues we have been grappling with as a nation is corruption, and it has had such a devastating effect on our national development. I have been convinced that until morality becomes the foundation upon which our governance system is built, we can never go forward as a nation.

Our traditional practices, which have shaped our cultural beliefs, have always espoused values that have kept us along the straight and the narrow and have preserved our societies since ancient times.

These are values that frown on negative habits like stealing, cheating, greediness, selfishness, etc. Our grandparents have told us stories of societies where stealing was regarded as so shameful that offenders, when caught, have on a number of instances committed suicide.

In fact, my mother told me of a story where a man who was living in the same village as her mother (my grandmother), after having been caught stealing a neighbour’s cockerel, out of shame committed suicide on a mango tree. Those were the days that shameful acts were an abomination.

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Tegare worship, a traditional spiritual worship during which the spirit possesses the Tegare Priest and begins to reveal secrets, was one of the means by which the society upheld African values in the days of my grandmother and the early childhood days of my mother.

Those were the days when the fear of being killed by Tegare prevented people from engaging in anti-social vices. These days, people sleeping with other people’s wives are not uncommon.

These wrongful behaviour was not countenanced at all by Tegare. One was likely going to lose his life on days that Tegare operates, and so unhealthy habits like coveting your neighbour’s wife was a taboo.

Stealing of other people’s farm produce, for instance, could mean certain death or incapacitation of the whole or part of the body in the full glare of everybody. People realised that there were consequences for wrongdoing, and this went a long way to motivate the society to adhere to right values.

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Imagine a President being sworn into office and whoever administers the oath says, “Please say this after me: I, Mr. …., do solemnly swear by God, the spirits of my ancestors and the spirits ruling in Ghana, that should I engage in corrupt acts, may I and my family become crippled, may madness become entrenched in my family, may incurable sicknesses and diseases be my portion and that of my family, both immediate and extended.”

Can you imagine a situation where a few weeks afterwards the President goes to engage in corrupt acts and we hear of his sudden demise or incapacitation and confessing that he engaged in corrupt acts before passing or before the incapacitation—and the effect it will have on his successor? I believe we have to critically examine this option to curb corruption.

My grandmother gave me an eyewitness account of one such encounter where a woman died instantly after the Tegare Priest had revealed a wrong attitude she had displayed during the performance on one of the days scheduled for Tegare spirit manifestation.

According to her story, the Priest, after he had been possessed by the spirit, declared that for what the woman had done, he would not forgive her and that he would kill. Instantly, according to my grandmother, the lady fell down suddenly and she died—just like what happened to Ananias and his wife Sapphira in Acts Chapter 5.

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NB: ‘CHANGE KOTOKA INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT TO KOFI BAAKO

By Laud Kissi-Mensah

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Emotional distortions:A lethal threat to mental health

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Emotional distortions can indeed have a profound impact on an individual’s mental health and well-being. These distortions can lead to a range of negative consequences, including anxiety, depression, and impaired relationships.

Emotional surgery is a therapeutic approach that aims to address and heal emotional wounds, traumas, and blockages. This approach recognises that emotional pain can have a profound impact on an individual’s quality of life and seeks to provide a comprehensive and compassionate approach to healing.

How emotional surgery can help

Emotional surgery can help individuals:

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Identify and challenge negative thought patterns: By becoming aware of emotional distortions, individuals can learn to challenge and reframe negative thoughts.

Develop greater emotional resilience: Emotional surgery can help individuals develop the skills and strategies needed to manage their emotions and respond to challenging situations.

Improve relationships: By addressing emotional wounds and promoting emotional well-being, individuals can develop more positive and healthy relationships with others.

The benefits of emotional surgery

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The benefits of emotional surgery can include:

Improved mental health outcomes: Emotional surgery can help individuals reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression.

Enhanced relationships: Emotional surgery can help individuals develop more positive and healthy relationships with others.

Increased self-awareness: Emotional surgery can help individuals develop a deeper understanding of themselves and their emotions.

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A path towards healing

Emotional surgery offers a promising approach to addressing emotional distortions and promoting emotional well-being. By acknowledging the impact of emotional pain and seeking to provide a comprehensive and compassionate approach to healing, individuals can take the first step towards recovery and improved mental health.

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BY ROBERT EKOW GRIMMOND-THOMPSON

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